[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Does this also mean you are Moon worshipers?

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Have you any idea of the tortures eternal and excruciating reserved for those who would mock the Lord of Hosts?

I have no idea where the satan figure figures in your farinaceous friends fiendishness, but God created our Satan and he's good at his job.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Have you any idea of the tortures eternal and excruciating reserved for those who would mock the Lord of Hosts?

I have no idea where the satan figure figures in your farinaceous friends fiendishness, but God created our Satan and he's good at his job.

Who is mocking?
Who was it who said their Lord likes to flash his bottom at men?

So let me get this right, you say that your Lord created your Satan, you say it is wrong to give in to Satan, but if he is one of your lords creations then how can it be wrong to do what he asks.

I find the Teachings of the True Creator much less confusing, be nice to people you get good beer and nice strippers, if you are not nice you get warm beer and poxy strippers, if you are really bad then you don't even get to see the stage. A much more straight forward look at things

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Now let make it clear to start with, a persons sexual orientation is their own affair, I do not judge them for it, but you lot seem to feel that is very important. This I find strange as considering what you have just explained, it clearly shows that your book depicts your version of God as someone who likes men to look at his bottom. So how can you hate homosexuals so much when you follow a myth that clearly depicts a supreme being that is what some of you would call a "shirt lifter"

Because GOD tells us DO AS I SAY, NOT AS I DO. We can't do God things anyway. It's not that we hate homosexuals at all. We are merely ordered to kill them.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Who is mocking?
Who was it who said their Lord likes to flash his bottom at men?

Likes? Likes? Where do you get that from. He probably went away weeping Perfect Godly Tears. He could only show His rear parts because His Face kills.

So let me get this right, you say that your Lord created your Satan, you say it is wrong to give in to Satan, but if he is one of your lords creations then how can it be wrong to do what he asks.

You're like my wife - she speaks in pronouns. The final "he" do you mean God or Satan? If you mean Satan, then the answer is obvious - Satan is the father of lies, and as such he will not be giving any useful commands - he is a sort of Anti-God. Anyway, my dog is a creation of God and if I obeyed her, I'd be out in the fields all day chasing critters and urinating in the street. Sir, you're an idiot.

I find the Teachings of the True Creator much less confusing, be nice to people you get good beer and nice strippers, if you are not nice you get warm beer and poxy strippers, if you are really bad then you don't even get to see the stage. A much more straight forward look at things

Ah! The path to damnation is broad and easy, you forego an eternity of bliss for these few short years in this Vale of Tears.

Can you not find it in your heart to abandon the noodly (did I write that?) god that now dominates your life, invades every one of your waking hours and accept the Warm Blood of Baby Jesus?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Who is mocking?
Who was it who said their Lord likes to flash his bottom at men?

So let me get this right, you say that your Lord created your Satan, you say it is wrong to give in to Satan, but if he is one of your lords creations then how can it be wrong to do what he asks.

I find the Teachings of the True Creator much less confusing, be nice to people you get good beer and nice strippers, if you are not nice you get warm beer and poxy strippers, if you are really bad then you don't even get to see the stage. A much more straight forward look at things

Friend, your problem is that you are trying to think for yourself. Nothing in ANY religious literature even remotely suggests that anyone should think for themselves. Remember what happened to Eve when she wouldn't listen to GOD and took advice from a serpent?

As soon as you try to think for yourself SATAN whispers in your ear. If you listen and deny GOD, it won't be pleasant for you boiling away in a vat of RAMEN for eternity!

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Likes? Likes? Where do you get that from. He probably went away weeping Perfect Godly Tears. He could only show His rear parts because His Face kills.

I thought you claim your god to be all powerful, yet he can not choose what can be seen by his creation? I think it was written that way as the writer liked mens bottoms, not there is anything wrong with that.

Any True Creator would be able to appear to his creation as the True Creator clearly did in the past hence the cave paintings and the ancient geek pottery depicting such appearances.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

I thought you claim your god to be all powerful, yet he can not choose what can be seen by his creation?

Obviously “Bits” of Him can be seen, it is just that his face is so awesome, it kills you – why shouldn’t God have that?

I think it was written that way as the writer liked mens bottoms, not there is anything wrong with that.

Fortunately, as a heathen, your opinion is of little value.

Any True Creator would be able to appear to his creation as the True Creator clearly did in the past hence the cave paintings

Why would any half-decent creator appear to Abos?

and the ancient geek pottery depicting such appearances.

As much as I enjoyed that, I see Jesus has directed your typing finger and is reminding you not to mock Him…

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Why would any half-decent creator appear to Abos?

We agree the world and all in it was created by a supreme being, just you are blind to the truth that it was The Flying Spaghetti Monster... So all people are HIS creation so why would he not appear to one section of them?

As much as I enjoyed that, I see Jesus has directed your typing finger and is reminding you not to mock Him

Why? did the Greeks not have geeks too?

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

We agree the world and all in it was created by a supreme being, just you are blind to the truth that it was The Flying Spaghetti Monster... So all people are HIS creation so why would he not appear to one section of them?

There are certain obvious facts that would dictate that an appearance to Abos would not be a way of showing the world of your Glory. What God in His Right Mind would appear to a stone-age culture surrounded by desert and pronounce mysteries and His presence.

They didn't have the interweb in those days and the only way that word could get out was probably many centuries later after which time His Message would have been garbled (if it was worth reciting in the first place.)

Anyhoo, I'm not too sure he gave a message: I quote from the "I'd Rather You Didn't" bit of the Gospel of FSM "7. I'd really rather you didn't go around telling people I talk to you."

God was very talkative in the old days - He's dropped off a bit of late on the Public Broadcasting side having had 6,000yrs to say all that we require but He does still talk to True Christians(tm)

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

They didn't have the interweb in those days and the only way that word could get out was probably many centuries later after which time His Message would have been garbled (if it was worth reciting in the first place.)

Mmm and what was the interweb like around the Med 2000 years ago, or in 1620 for that mater?

God was very talkative in the old days - He's dropped off a bit of late on the Public Broadcasting side having had 6,000yrs to say all that we require but He does still talk to True Christians

LOL the world and every thing in it was only created 5000 years ago so if your god was gong to have a lot to say for 6000, we should have another millennium of chatter from him.

I don't claim the FSM talks to me, I am not that interesting but we are all his creation so if he was to appear then it would just as likely he appear to any one group of people then any other group.

[JennyD]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Those so called pirates do not have parrots, wooden legs or even eye patches so how can they be called true?

They hijack ships and steal things from them. That makes them pirates.

You probably just don't consider them "true pirates" because they are Negroes, and Pastafarians are notorious racists.

You are the one displaying a sexist attitude, assuming the strippers would all be female

Even if some strippers are male, you are still objectifying them and oppressing them, forcing them to be whores for the pleasure of your adherents.

Disgusting. No Christian would ever use other people for his or her own pleasure, only for the glory of God!

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

They hijack ships and steal things from them. That makes them pirates.

You probably just don't consider them "true pirates" because they are Negroes, and Pastafarians are notorious racists.

The true pirates I speak of where not exclusively white European, many were liberated slaves

Even if some strippers are male, you are still objectifying them and oppressing them, forcing them to be whores for the pleasure of your adherents.

Disgusting. No Christian would ever use other people for his or her own pleasure, only for the glory of God!

Heaven consists of Beer Volcanoes and Stripper Factories, so not actually people, so no objectifying or oppressing involved. Heaven is open to all not just those that no the truth, the quality of the Beer and the Strippers is dependent on how nice a person you are, not what you believe.

If someone lives a good life but has had the misfortune to not have had the truth made known to them they still get the good beer and great strippers

[JennyD]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Heaven consists of Beer Volcanoes and Stripper Factories, so not actually people, so no objectifying or oppressing involved.

I see. So you promote cloning, or slavery, or perhaps android-lust?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

I see. So you promote cloning, or slavery, or perhaps android-lust?

No, a gift from our creator to his creation.