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  • hellion
    Nasty and Mean-Spirited
    • Nov 2006
    • 564

    #91
    Re: And I had thought I saw it all

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    Do you equate secular prison with eternal hellfire? I assure you that they are both quite different. True Christians%#153; may be locked up by activist judges appointed by Bill Clinton, but once we are Saved©, we are Saved©. Nothing can ever change that.

    For your possible edification, here is a partial list of things that God says that killing is prescribed. Try studying the Holy Bible to fill your spirit with goodness, instead of the venom you currently spew.

    Which of these sins have YOU committed?


    For Adultery

    And the man that committeth adultery with another man's wife, even he that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death. -- Leviticus 20:10

    For Animals

    If an ox gore a man or a woman, that they die: then the ox shall be surely stoned. -- Exodus 21:28

    For Bestiality


    Whosoever lieth with a beast shall surely be put to death. -- Exodus 22:19

    And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast. -- Leviticus 20:15

    And if a woman approach unto any beast, and lie down thereto, thou shalt kill the woman, and the beast: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. -- Leviticus 20:16


    For Blasphemy

    He that blasphemeth the name of the LORD, he shall surely be put to death, and all the congregation shall certainly stone him. -- Leviticus 24:16

    For Breaking the Sabbath

    Ye shall keep the sabbath therefore; for it is holy unto you: every one that defileth it shall surely be put to death. -- Exodus 31:14

    Six days may work be done; but in the seventh is the sabbath of rest, holy to the LORD: whosoever doeth any work in the sabbath day, he shall surely be put to death. -- Exodus 31:15

    Six days shall work be done, but on the seventh day there shall be to you an holy day, a sabbath of rest to the LORD: whosoever doeth work therein shall be put to death. -- Exodus 35:2


    For Disobedient children


    He that smiteth his father, or his mother, shall be surely put to death. -- Exodus 21:15

    He that curseth his father, or his mother, shall surely be put to death. -- Exodus 21:17

    For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall be surely put to death: he hath cursed his father or his mother; his blood shall be upon him. -- Leviticus 20:9


    For Homosexuality

    If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. -- Leviticus 20:13
    For Incest

    And the man that lieth with his father's wife hath uncovered his father's nakedness: both of them shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. -- Leviticus 20:11

    And if a man lie with his daughter in law, both of them shall surely be put to death: they have wrought confusion; their blood shall be upon them. -- Leviticus 20:12

    And if a man take a wife and her mother, it is wickedness: they shall be burnt with fire, both he and they; that there be no wickedness among you. -- Leviticus 20:14



    For Rape Victims who don't cry out loudly enough

    If a damsel that is a virgin be betrothed unto an husband, and a man find her in the city, and lie with her; Then ye shall bring them both out unto the gate of that city, and ye shall stone them with stones that they die; the damsel, because she cried not, being in the city; and the man, because he hath humbled his neighbour's wife: so thou shalt put away evil from among you. -- Deuteronomy 22:23-24

    For Stealing Slaves

    He that stealeth a man, and selleth him, or if he be found in his hand, he shall surely be put to death. -- Exodus 21:16

    For not being a Virgin on the night of the wedding

    If any man take a wife, and go in unto her, and hate her ... and say, I took this woman, and when I came to her, I found her not a maid: Then shall the father of the damsel, and her mother, take and bring forth the tokens of the damsel's virginity unto the elders of the city in the gate.... But if this thing be true, and the tokens of virginity be not found for the damsel: Then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die: because she hath wrought folly in Israel, to play the whore in her father's house: so shalt thou put evil away from among you.-- Deuteronomy 22:13-22

    For Witches

    Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live. -- Exodus 22:18
    For Worshiping another god

    He that sacrificeth unto any god save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed. -- Exodus 22:20
    Wow! You're just a bunch of homicidal maniacs! And it says 'shall be put to death' not 'you have to kill them'. And you call the Catholics a cult...

    I've broken: The Sabbath ones, the disobedient children ones, and the blasphemy ones.
    "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

    Moderatio est Figmentum

    Comment

    • Pastor Al E Pistle
      Christ's Cōnsiliārius
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 9323

      #92
      Re: And I had thought I saw it all

      [quote=hellion;17698]Wow! You're just a bunch of homicidal maniacs! And it says 'shall be put to death' not 'you have to kill them'. And you call the Catholics a cult...

      I've broken: The Sabbath ones, the disobedient children ones, and the blasphemy ones. And I've worshipped other gods, no god, and Satan. And I used to be Wiccan and I still play with Ouija boards.[/quote]Boy, are YOU ever in trouble! After you send me your credit card information, we will have to send some people to talk with you.
      Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
      "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
      Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


      Comment

      • hellion
        Nasty and Mean-Spirited
        • Nov 2006
        • 564

        #93
        Re: And I had thought I saw it all

        [QUOTE=Pastor Al E Pistle;17717]
        Originally posted by hellion
        Wow! You're just a bunch of homicidal maniacs! And it says 'shall be put to death' not 'you have to kill them'. And you call the Catholics a cult...

        I've broken: The Sabbath ones, the disobedient children ones, and the blasphemy ones. And I've worshipped other gods, no god, and Satan. And I used to be Wiccan and I still play with Ouija boards.[/quote]Boy, are YOU ever in trouble! After you send me your credit card information, we will have to send some people to talk with you.
        Why would I send you my credit card info? I'd rathar talk to dead people via Ouija board.
        "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

        Moderatio est Figmentum

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78556

          #94
          Re: And I had thought I saw it all

          [QUOTE=hellion;17727]
          Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post

          Why would I send you my credit card info? I'd rathar talk to dead people via Ouija board.
          Then you are bound for eternal damnation, without any doubt. Refusing to send a love offering to Jesus, as Pastor Pistle so lovingly suggested, will do nothing but hasten your unspeakable fate.

          Your dark master satan will not put up with your feminazi backtalk, I promise.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • hellion
            Nasty and Mean-Spirited
            • Nov 2006
            • 564

            #95
            Re: And I had thought I saw it all

            [QUOTE=Pastor Ezekiel;17733]
            Originally posted by hellion View Post

            Then you are bound for eternal damnation, without any doubt. You forget, I don't care.
            Refusing to send a love offering to Jesus, as Pastor Pistle so lovingly suggested, will do nothing but hasten your unspeakable fate.

            Your dark master satan will not put up with your feminazi backtalk, I promise.
            I know I'm supposed to be Atheist, but certain events have led me to believe in your fantasy world about god. Although I still believe the bible's full of shit, I do believe in Satan. And I think he's a pretty cool guy. I talked to him via Ouija board and he convinced me there was a guy up in my attic. So I went to check it out and there was no one up there! I was mad. Then he started laughing at me. I got to admit, it was a clever hoax. Point so being, I don't think Satan's as bad as you put him out to be.
            "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

            Moderatio est Figmentum

            Comment

            • Pastor Al E Pistle
              Christ's Cōnsiliārius
               
              • Sep 2006
              • 9323

              #96
              Re: And I had thought I saw it all

              [quote=hellion;17745]
              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post

              I know I'm supposed to be Atheist, but certain events have led me to believe in your fantasy world about god. Although I still believe the bible's full of shit, I do believe in Satan. And I think he's a pretty cool guy. I talked to him via Ouija board and he convinced me there was a guy up in my attic. So I went to check it out and there was no one up there! I was mad. Then he started laughing at me. I got to admit, it was a clever hoax. Point so being, I don't think Satan's as bad as you put him out to be.
              You should have just asked me. I can assure you that your attic is completely empty.
              Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
              "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
              Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


              Comment

              • Brother Temperance
                Senior Usher
                True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                A very nice young man
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 15621

                #97
                Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                Originally posted by hellion View Post
                Wow! You're just a bunch of homicidal maniacs! And it says 'shall be put to death' not 'you have to kill them'. And you call the Catholics a cult...

                I've broken: The Sabbath ones, the disobedient children ones, and the blasphemy ones.
                It commands us not to suffer witches to live. That is a direct order. And if we don't put the unrighteous to death, who will?
                Originally posted by Helliar
                I know I'm supposed to be Atheist, but certain events have led me to believe in your fantasy world about god. Although I still believe the bible's full of shit, I do believe in Satan. And I think he's a pretty cool guy. I talked to him via Ouija board and he convinced me there was a guy up in my attic. So I went to check it out and there was no one up there! I was mad. Then he started laughing at me. I got to admit, it was a clever hoax. Point so being, I don't think Satan's as bad as you put him out to be.
                Translation: I am full of marijuana, and possessed by a demon.
                O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                Comment

                • Pastor Ezekiel
                  Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                   
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 78556

                  #98
                  Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                  [QUOTE=hellion;17745]
                  Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post

                  I know I'm supposed to be Atheist, but certain events have led me to believe in your fantasy world about god. Although I still believe the bible's full of shit, I do believe in Satan. And I think he's a pretty cool guy. I talked to him via Ouija board and he convinced me there was a guy up in my attic. So I went to check it out and there was no one up there! I was mad. Then he started laughing at me. I got to admit, it was a clever hoax. Point so being, I don't think Satan's as bad as you put him out to be.
                  FOOLISH WOMAN! If you believe in satan, then you also believe in God!

                  I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.--Isaiah 45:7

                  You have chosen the wrong side, and so you can expect God's anger to be reflected in your eternal damnation. You won't need to worry about God sending you up into the attic as a practical joke. No siree bob....
                  Who Will Jesus Damn?

                  Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                  Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                  Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                  Comment

                  • hellion
                    Nasty and Mean-Spirited
                    • Nov 2006
                    • 564

                    #99
                    Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                    Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                    It commands us not to suffer witches to live. That is a direct order. And if we don't put the unrighteous to death, who will?
                    Translation: I am full of marijuana, and possessed by a demon.
                    Yeah...I don't do drugs and I've never been possessed.
                    "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

                    Moderatio est Figmentum

                    Comment

                    • Brother Temperance
                      Senior Usher
                      True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                      A very nice young man
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 15621

                      #100
                      Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                      Originally posted by hellion View Post
                      Yeah...I don't do drugs and I've never been possessed.
                      So if it's not chemicals and it's not demons, then what the hell is wrong with you?
                      O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                      God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                      Comment

                      • Poetic Peter
                        Christian Poet Emeritus
                        Forum Member
                        • Nov 2006
                        • 1696

                        #101
                        Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                        Originally posted by hellion View Post
                        <snick>I've never been possessed<snock>

                        Young lady, regarding "possession";
                        I am sorry you've not had a Baptist for a husband.

                        I feel rather kindly towards you.
                        Mrs. Peter, though, does not.





                        Between a sock and wringer
                        Peter

                        Comment

                        • hellion
                          Nasty and Mean-Spirited
                          • Nov 2006
                          • 564

                          #102
                          Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                          Originally posted by Poetic Peter View Post

                          Young lady, regarding "possession";
                          I am sorry you've not had a Baptist for a husband.

                          I feel rather kindly towards you.
                          Mrs. Peter, though, does not.





                          Between a sock and wringer
                          Peter
                          your poetry sucks.
                          "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

                          Moderatio est Figmentum

                          Comment

                          • Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.
                            Scientific Advisor
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 2373

                            #103
                            Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                            Such vile language makes Jesus sad.... Poetry is indeed beautiful if it is for Jesus, no matter the rhyming scheme and beat! Indeed, the entirety of the Psalms is music to His ears, as is any form of worship (and, of course, the weeping and gnashing of teeth of the damned).
                            Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"

                            Comment

                            • Brother Temperance
                              Senior Usher
                              True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                              A very nice young man
                              True Christian™
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 15621

                              #104
                              Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                              Originally posted by hellion View Post
                              your poetry sucks.
                              You have been assigned fresh new warning points for lying. And I'd like to see you write better poetry.
                              O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                              God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                              Comment

                              • hellion
                                Nasty and Mean-Spirited
                                • Nov 2006
                                • 564

                                #105
                                Re: And I had thought I saw it all

                                [QUOTE=Pastor Al E Pistle;17753]
                                Originally posted by hellion View Post
                                You should have just asked me. I can assure you that your attic is completely empty.
                                How would you know?
                                "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

                                Moderatio est Figmentum

                                Comment

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