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  • for the love of Fsm
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    • Jan 2011
    • 37

    #256
    Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

    Originally posted by KJV Lover View Post
    Has your god shot his wad over a 400 year old tome, such as The Holy Bible?
    I find that comment to be childish and immature to the point I will not reward it with a intelligable response.

    Originally posted by KJV Lover View Post
    Has the Godly Sarah Palin been touched by his noodly apendage?
    I do not claim to know the answer to that question. All I can say is I certainly hope, as I hope for all, that she has been.

    Originally posted by KJV Lover View Post
    Has your god sent his army to Iraq and proven he is more powerful than the false Muslim god?
    No war has ever been started by the one true god. No war will ever be started by our one true god. Dominance and force, are not something that pastafarians use to "convince" others to accept the truth.

    Originally posted by KJV Lover View Post
    Is your god punishing Australia with floods?

    The answer to all these questions, and many others, is no. Only the True Christian God exists, He hates all other gods and He hates all those that worship false gods.

    Got it? ?
    You are correct, no was the right answer for many of those statements.

    Comment

    • Homosexualgaylord
      Unsaved trash chantarded God mocker
      • Feb 2011
      • 6

      #257
      Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

      Agreed; Pastafarianism is definitely the right way to go.
      Revelation 20:14-15
      And death and hell were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death. And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.

      Comment

      • ~Cutter~
        Confirmed Enemy of God
        • Feb 2011
        • 27

        #258
        Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

        Originally posted by Nefiron View Post
        Okay.
        Since most of the users here are older than my grandmother I would keep this as short as possible for you believers.

        this is:
        10 Reasons why Pastafari is actually god.


        1: He created midgets
        2: The Religion explains global warming and piracy is having a connection.
        3: Pirate cloth is teh shit!
        4: He is everywhere, there is pictures that proves! Because we can PROVE that he exists!
        5: Hell is a myth! You can sin much as you want! (Start peeing on your couch)
        6: It's a denial of darwinistic theory. The stuff you guys hate with all your heart.
        7: Everyone loves spaghetti and meatballs!
        8: There is no need to have a religion named after a boy name, when you can have a religion nearly named after some delicious food!
        9: You can laugh of hatemails. The High Priest gets them a lot!
        10: Do you hear the voices too?

        Btw: To sign up for the new curch, you can visit. http://www.landoverbaptist.net

        Post people!
        Hey buddy, why don't you put down the crack pipe and pick up the Bible?

        Comment

        • Jo Freddie
          Unsaved trash
          Hateful God mocking pirate
          • Apr 2009
          • 6339

          #259
          Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

          Originally posted by ~Cutter~ View Post
          Hey buddy, why don't you put down the crack pipe and pick up the Bible?
          Nefiron's mind is clearer then yours can ever be while you remain under the influence of the cult of the Zombie on a stick.
          Posted via Pasta

          True Pastafarian™

          May my Sauce be with you!
          Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
          Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
          The Loose Canon - HTML version
          Loose Canon Fan Page
          North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
          I have been to The Volcano!

          Comment

          • Benedict A. Davis
            Winning Souls in his Winnebago
            True Christian™
            • May 2010
            • 3900

            #260
            Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

            The next thing will be that this is proof positive of your deity, some sort of coffee stain on a tea towel.
            Click image for larger version

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            Come on, get a life.
            sigpic 1 Chronicles 16:15
            Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
            Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
            Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

            Comment

            • Zechariah Smyth
              Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
              True Christian™
              • Feb 2011
              • 15251

              #261
              Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

              Originally posted by Homosexualgaylord View Post
              Agreed; Pastafarianism is definitely the right way to go.
              Yes, we should all heed the advice of a pole-smoking Eskimo.



              You know, it is possible to Pray the Gay Away™...I did! I did it the hard way, but if you follow Brother Harold Porter's 12 Step Program at



              you'll be back to normal in no time.



              YiC,

              The Vicar
              sigpic

              Comment

              • John_Burrows
                Confirmed Enemy of God
                BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                • Mar 2011
                • 3

                #262
                Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                I love me some Sgadetti I mean Spaghetti.

                Jon

                Comment

                • Jo Freddie
                  Unsaved trash
                  Hateful God mocking pirate
                  • Apr 2009
                  • 6339

                  #263
                  Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                  Brothers and Sisters, Pirates and Wenches, I would like to share a miracle with you all.

                  Today when I go into work I reached into my bag and found the top of my coffee (I like real coffee so I take fresh coffee into work everyday), my first thought was "Oh Soggy Noodles, no fresh coffee for me tonight" I then found the coffee container, still full to the brim with ground coffee, none had split out. Our Lord Noodle had clearly used his Noodly Appendage to keep the grounds from spilling out all over the inside of my bag.

                  This proves to me that God IS the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I mean do these Baptist not consider me to be "Unsaved trash" and a "God mocking pirate" The false god of the KJV is mean and vengeful, if he existed then the inside of my bag would be covered in ground coffee would it not?

                  A little background, I have a 70 mile journey to work, along country roads, over speed bumps, up and down hills, there is no way the coffee could have stayed in the container without divine assistance.
                  Posted via Pasta

                  True Pastafarian™

                  May my Sauce be with you!
                  Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
                  Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
                  The Loose Canon - HTML version
                  Loose Canon Fan Page
                  North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
                  I have been to The Volcano!

                  Comment

                  • Ahzohe
                    Unsaved trash
                    • Apr 2013
                    • 6

                    #264
                    Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                    Hail the Flying Spaghetti Monster!

                    Comment

                    • Pastor Ezekiel
                      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                       
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 78555

                      #265
                      Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                      Originally posted by Ahzohe View Post
                      Hail the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
                      Let's not and say we did.
                      Who Will Jesus Damn?

                      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                      Comment

                      • ThyShepherdsSheep
                        Unsaved trash
                        Under Investigation
                        • Apr 2013
                        • 19

                        #266
                        Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                        Originally posted by Lisa H View Post
                        I can only think of 1 Reason why God is not a flying spaghetti monster!

                        Genesis 1:1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth

                        Spaghetti came after the creation of the earth
                        AMEN!! For a woman, you have much potential in the eyes of the LORD. This argument should have ended after this statement. Nothing could be more factual than this. Who can argue with HIS word? No one!!
                        Zechariah 12:4 - In that day, saith the LORD, I will smite every horse with astonishment, and his rider with madness: and I will open mine eyes upon the house of Judah, and will smite every horse of the people with blindness.

                        Comment

                        • dawkins
                          Unsaved trash
                          Under Investigation
                          • Apr 2013
                          • 1

                          #267
                          Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                          hail the flying spaghetti monster , i am a true Pastafarian

                          Comment

                          • Zechariah Smyth
                            Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
                            True Christian™
                            • Feb 2011
                            • 15251

                            #268
                            Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

                            Originally posted by dawkins View Post
                            hail the flying spaghetti monster , i am a true Pastafarian
                            Hi there! Instead of trying to bore us to tears with the same tired "humor" that kids post here every single day, how about coming up with something original?

                            Failing that, please make a thread of your own in the Introduction Forum...we want to get to know you!

                            Yours in Christ,

                            Z. Smyth
                            sigpic

                            Comment

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