[Alan Roberts Jr.]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

Well, to be honest none - and that is not a practice of my religion, but a practice of middle eastern culture. I could reply back with how many women and children have you bombed lately?

0.
Can you reply with a reason that you hate Jesus? He did die so that you could have a second chance, you know.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

Personally I wrap by telephone in a few layers of saran wrap. I pray over my phone before I answer it. I have a secret phobia of demons coming out those little holes in the receiver and going into my mouth or my ear holes.

I also microwave all of my mail for 5 minutes before I open it. I say a prayer of protection while it is running.

So far so good. I'm still demon free and free of the AIDS.

[Perkele123]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

gay germs? Wow did you get a nobel prize for this discovery.

[Alphonse Alban]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

gay germs? Wow did you get a nobel prize for this discovery.

Are you a victim of public school or something?

Even a child knows that that it was Luc Montagnier with Françoise Barré-Sinoussi who got the Nobel prize for their work with the gay germs starting from early 80's.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

gay germs? Wow did you get a nobel prize for this discovery.

How many eskimos have won the Nobel Prize?

[poop paul]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

I have been thinking about using oven to decontaminate the gay mail, but I'm not sure if the heat is high enough without paper catching fire.

A toaster oven would work fine for letter mail, regular oven is ok for bigger mail. Set at 200 Fahrenheit, 200 will kill anything but wont set paper on fire.

[Brother Hawkins]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

I have always trusted Clorox bleach. Soaking packages and skin in bleach for five minutes has no downside.

[krunsch]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

Or is there some even more effective way?

Hmm, I might need to describe the problem from the start.

As we all know, gays spread AIDS around for fun. I have always done my best to protect me and my family by keeping any homo at least baseball bat's length away from me. However, now I'm in bit of a stalemate with post office.

It all started some time ago when I called to post office to get confirmation that I am getting gay free service. Person on the other side of the phone line sounded bit funny when he told me that he is not sure, but he will check it out and contact me later.

After few months I begin to suspect that I was not to be contacted by this person again, so I made another call with more forceful approach. Again the first person I called did not know about that kind of service, but I got another number within the post office I could call to. After quite lengthy round of phone calls, I found out to my horror, that post office in my country does not have "No-homo" policy with their employees.

Ever since I have been pressuring the post office so they start to respect human rights of Christians by guaranteeing gay free mail for good people.

So now we get back to my dilemma. Until post office starts to respect their customers, I have to protect me and my family by cleaning my AIDS laced mail. So far I have used tweezers to remove mail from mailbox and put it in special container. The container I then have placed in very cold freezer for a week. After that I go through mail with dispensable latex gloves and burn envelopes and such right away.

This seems to do the trick (so far we have remained AIDS free), but weeks delay before you can read your mail is bit inconvenient, so I was wondering if I could speed up the process some how. I have been thinking about using oven to decontaminate the gay mail, but I'm not sure if the heat is high enough without paper catching fire.

Has anyone else had these kind problems and thus have more experience with the problem I'm facing?

I am a chemist, I could provide you with something. I can also offer you a filter for nuclear free water and an environment without genes.

[Nobar King]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

If you're such a good chemist maybe you should try curing baldness.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

I am a chemist, I could provide you with something. I can also offer you a filter for nuclear free water and an environment without genes.

Sounds like you're describing your home.

[WWJDnow]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

I'm pretty sure the only thing sure to remove gay germs is the sweet smelling blood of Jesus.

[Alphonse Alban]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

I am a chemist, I could provide you with something.

No thank you. If you wouldn't be so lazy, you would have read the whole tread and noticed that I have all the chemicals I need.

Then I realized that there are faster ways to get things really cold than freezing. So I called to my old buddy who works in chemical plant and ordered daily supply of liquid nitrogen from him. First I just sank the mail in nitrogen and after picking it up, hammered it to get rid of AIDS. This however shattered the mail. So further testing was needed. As I wanted to see if the liquid nitrogen is enough itself to kill small critters like gay-germs, I used my my daughters guinea pig as, well, guinea pig. I was happy to see that it was very much dead after fishing it out of vat even before hammering (but I must say hammering DID cause rather spectacular effect). When the girl was asking after her guinea pig, I just told her that God wanted it dead and now it is resting in pieces. She did not get it. I wish she had been a son.

Anyway, I am now content with liquid nitrogen. It kills the AIDS growth and my neighbors have started to look at me with whole new level of respect, after they have seen me dipping my mail with huge pliers into steaming and bubbling vat on my porch, while wearing black rubber boots, rubber apron and rubber gloves. Of course it is economical and good for environment too, as I don't have to use any MY electricity on making liquid nitrogen.

I'm pretty sure the only thing sure to remove gay germs is the sweet smelling blood of Jesus.

Amen! That must be the reason why blood of Jesus is also the only known cure for gaysexuality.

[Basilissa]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

I am a chemist, I could provide you with something. I can also offer you a filter for nuclear free water and an environment without genes.

I think he's threatening to nuke us!

[Vavoline Johnson]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

Make sho yo Lady folks douche wif Lysol and going over them kids wif a Steam Shark ain't gonna hurt neither. Both them remedies kill jist about everything

[Obese Gay Al]

Re: What's better, hot or cold for removing gay germs?

Or is there some even more effective way?

Hmm, I might need to describe the problem from the start.

As we all know, gays spread AIDS around for fun. I have always done my best to protect me and my family by keeping any homo at least baseball bat's length away from me. However, now I'm in bit of a stalemate with post office.

It all started some time ago when I called to post office to get confirmation that I am getting gay free service. Person on the other side of the phone line sounded bit funny when he told me that he is not sure, but he will check it out and contact me later.

After few months I begin to suspect that I was not to be contacted by this person again, so I made another call with more forceful approach. Again the first person I called did not know about that kind of service, but I got another number within the post office I could call to. After quite lengthy round of phone calls, I found out to my horror, that post office in my country does not have "No-homo" policy with their employees.

Ever since I have been pressuring the post office so they start to respect human rights of Christians by guaranteeing gay free mail for good people.

So now we get back to my dilemma. Until post office starts to respect their customers, I have to protect me and my family by cleaning my AIDS laced mail. So far I have used tweezers to remove mail from mailbox and put it in special container. The container I then have placed in very cold freezer for a week. After that I go through mail with dispensable latex gloves and burn envelopes and such right away.

This seems to do the trick (so far we have remained AIDS free), but weeks delay before you can read your mail is bit inconvenient, so I was wondering if I could speed up the process some how. I have been thinking about using oven to decontaminate the gay mail, but I'm not sure if the heat is high enough without paper catching fire.

Has anyone else had these kind problems and thus have more experience with the problem I'm facing?

I couldn't help but laugh at this.