[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

We have to stay focused on the scheming of Creflo Dollar.

Now he is shaking down his supporters for money by telling them he has visions of a bigger airplane. Of course, what he means is he wants an airplane bigger than Pastor Zeke's.

One thing we will not doing is come on this site and beg for money like Creflo is doing. God will provide us with adequate money for WHITE EAGLE because He knows Pastor Zeke is the thin blue line holding back domination from Satan.

Landover Baptist members should know time is of the essence.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Samuel had another dream related to Pastor Ezekiel's new airplane last night. He says that in the dream, he saw a large and beautiful plane with the words "White Eagle" and some crosses painted on the sides and the tail in gorgeous gold paint. He has decided to send in another $500,000 and his family and mine will send in an additional $200,000.

Glory! Now we're on the right track. That extra $200,000 will help pay for that custom wallpaper guy to do the game room on the plane. He's doing some Jesus sketches for me already.

[Esther B.]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Samuel had another dream related to Pastor Ezekiel's new airplane last night. He says that in the dream, he saw a large and beautiful plane with the words "White Eagle" and some crosses painted on the sides and the tail in gorgeous gold paint. He has decided to send in another $500,000 and his family and mine will send in an additional $200,000.

[Naomi Ruth Lamb]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Esther,

I have stopped the payment on the $500,000 since your family is not in need. I was going to do this out of kindness for you, but I want nothing to do with donating for this monstrosity that is both unnecessary and takes away from the needs of the less fortunate.

Brother Dollar's ministry has mailed me a financial statement indicating expenditures for the downtrodden. Perhaps my money would be better spent there.

Still no satellite, still have a business on a street filled with potholes, and I am relinquishing my titanium tither parking spot and seating pass. I can sit on the bleachers with the faithful.

NRL

[Esther B.]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Esther, this is madness! You told me once that your family needed the money for their retirement and medical care. The need is far greater for your loved ones, darling! PLEASE - keep your funds.

Instead, I will give the money ON BEHALF OF YOUR FAMILY. I am not doing so in support of this project, but rather to preserve your family's financial future.

I have wired the amount of your donation already - so please don't fight me on this.

Trust me, I'll get a return on my investment. I'm on my way to Daisy's right now.

NRL

Thank you, Sister, but I don't remember telling you that. The majority of the money was donated by Samuel and his father, so my family won't suffer too much in terms of finances.

Also, Samuel is thinking of sending in some more money, but he's not sure how much yet.

[Freddy Osborne]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

I hope I'm not poking my nose into the private affairs of others at LBC, but I'd like to mention that March Madness, the national basketball tournament just ended.

There were dozens of games. My suspicion is some of the crafty sports experts among the men at LBC wagered on these games.

It is my humble opinion winnings such as these can be called the wages of sin. This money must be remitted entirely to the WHITE EAGLE aircraft fund.

On behalf of the Committee, thank you.

Excuse me Mayor but it appears those hens in the Flo Shack once again don't know what they are clucking about. Can you really imagine any of the fine men at Landover watching a bunch of sweaty jiggabboos flapping and jumping around for an entire month?

I actually administered the 2015 Bracketology Challenge for the Landover Men's Recreation Club. Below is the winning bracket submitted by yours truly.

I picked Yoga Pants because only pagan worshipping lesbosexuals wear them.

Deuteronomy 22:5 "The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God."

Exodus 20:3 "Thou shalt have no other gods before me."

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

I hope I'm not poking my nose into the private affairs of others at LBC, but I'd like to mention that March Madness, the national basketball tournament just ended.

There were dozens of games. My suspicion is some of the crafty sports experts among the men at LBC wagered on these games.

It is my humble opinion winnings such as these can be called the wages of sin. This money must be remitted entirely to the WHITE EAGLE aircraft fund.

On behalf of the Committee, thank you.

[Jim Farmer]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

That's great, ladies. I've already received Esther's family's combined $500,000, and now another $500,000 from Miss Lamb. Thank you ladies.

[Naomi Ruth Lamb]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Esther, this is madness! You told me once that your family needed the money for their retirement and medical care. The need is far greater for your loved ones, darling! PLEASE - keep your funds.

Instead, I will give the money ON BEHALF OF YOUR FAMILY. I am not doing so in support of this project, but rather to preserve your family's financial future.

I have wired the amount of your donation already - so please don't fight me on this.

Trust me, I'll get a return on my investment. I'm on my way to Daisy's right now.

NRL

[Esther B.]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

That is officially not enough. That amount wouldn't even cover the cost of my private chef for a week.

Tell Samuel to add a few more zeroes to that amount. Tell him "the chickens have come home to roost." He'll know what I mean.

Of course, Pastor! It just so happens that Samuel had a dream last night where God told him to "send a lot more money than that" (Samuel paraphrased it). He woke up and decided to send in $300,000 instead. His father and my father are going to send a combined total of $200,000 as well.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Samuel told me last night that he's like to send at least $3000 to go towards a new plane for Pastor Ezekiel. He'd like to know if that would be an acceptable amount. He says that if it isn't enough, he can send more.

That is officially not enough. That amount wouldn't even cover the cost of my private chef for a week.

Tell Samuel to add a few more zeroes to that amount. Tell him "the chickens have come home to roost." He'll know what I mean.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

I heard back from the Christian Children's Fund. They said the reason they are skimping on the donations this time around is because the number of shamans being burned in Africa is not up to quota. They are counting on us to preach the word of Jesus to these jigaboos. We need to step it up folks.

[Esther B.]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

Samuel told me last night that he's like to send at least $3000 to go towards a new plane for Pastor Ezekiel. He'd like to know if that would be an acceptable amount. He says that if it isn't enough, he can send more.

[Prayer Warrior]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

I refuse to participate in this campaign. As I said before, dogs are suffering while Arms of the Angel plays; our wounded warriors need us to say a prayer for peace; St Jude Hospital is providing life-saving care to a bald child; Hurricane Katrina victims are still trying to rebuild, and I couldn't care less what Creflo Dollar rides around in.

Now I get the news that the repaving of Crouch Blvd is being "indefinitely postponed" and my satellite dish doesn't work still...are these connected in some way? And the police didn't respond when my employee called to report a suspicious person last night. I'm dismayed but will keep my faith in the LORD.

I don't blame you for being skeptical. At first glance, 86 million might seem like a huge figure, especially when we have problems at home. Though you have to consider the bigger picture here.

Imagine you're about to hire a surgeon for an operation to save your eyesight, one looks really professional, is fully licensed, and is charging $5,000. Another man comes along and says "Hey, you know, I don't have those licenses or anything, but I'm really good, trust me. I have training in medical school and I looked this up on YouTube. That's pretty much the same thing. I'll do it for $200". Most people would pay the $5,000 without a second thought. Because when it comes to your health, it's that important, the cost isn't the issue. Getting your vision working is. You'd do just about anything to raise that money, right? Even if it meant going into debt, or selling off a valuable or cherished asset.

The same thing applies to companies, when you have multibillion dollar financial transactions on the line, you want someone with a proven track record, and some companies are even willing to pay millions of dollars to get it. Because there's just so much more at stake and they'd rather pay an extra 10 or 100 million to go with a proven product than take even a slight risk by going with someone cheaper.

Now imagine, when your immortal soul is at stake. Not just the 80, give or take 20 years of your life here on Earth, but your entire eternity. Wouldn't you be willing to pay a lot more than that measly $5,000?

We are incredibly fortunate to have God's favorite pastor here at Landover Baptist church. Trying to offer him less would be like going to a major Hollywood actor and saying "Hey, I know you made $30,000,000 on your last film, but could you work in my film for $500,000? I mean that's still a pretty good wage right? It's more than most people make." they'd laugh in your face and go somewhere else because they know how much revenue their movies generate. Someone as talented as Pastor Ezekiel could ask for stuff completely unrelated to giving his service, but instead he's asking for an aircraft that can have a real and tangible difference in people's lives.

Think of it in terms of soul per dollar ratio here. I'm just guessing here, as I'm not actually on the Aircraft committee. Lets say it costs roughly $100 million for the cost of the jet after including all the gas and travel expenses for the next 10 years or so (I'm assuming he'll be needing a new aircraft by then), making 20 trips a year. Pastor Ezekiel probably saves at least 1,000 souls per trip (that is a conservative estimate, I'm guessing the real number is much higher but I'm just using an even number to help keep it simple).

That's 200,000 souls won over for Christ! Or about $500 per soul. Would you damn people to Hell forever to save $500? I don't mean to discount your repaving projects, or getting sufficient police force, those are all important; but all that can wait! Even the police use hundreds of dollars per visit, sometimes thousands of dollars and in the process, may or may not save a life (which is why we need the second amendment). Pastor Ezekiel on the other hand is about as safe a bet you can get when it comes to saving souls, which are far move valuable than lives.

You should definitely reconsider making a donation, if for no other reason, the faster they have this new aircraft built, the faster we can move onto other projects. But the aircraft is priority number #1 for the time being.

[Jim Farmer]

Re: The New Jet Aircraft for Pastor Zeke Committee.

I ran into Granny July today, and she gave me $10.31 towards the plane.
She is currently the favorite for winning the catering contract.