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May the 
bless you extra special today on the anniversary of your birth!
bless you extra special today on the anniversary of your birth!-
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View PostMay the bless you extra special today on the anniversary of your birth!
Thank you, Dear Sister Mary. The cats are adorable, of course. I'm guessing that the black cat on the left represents the devil tempting the cat in the middle, and the white cat on the right is an angel trying to guide the middle cat to follow Jesus.
Thank the Lord for giving us black and white judgments set out in black on white print. With the Holy Spirit guiding my reading, I know that I can never go wrong going right to the Bible.
From God's Mouth to our eyes--through prophets, scribes, archeologists, translators, typesetters and editors. But we know that God guided everyone charged with delivering His Word to humanity. So how can there be any mistakes?
Confidently Yours,
HandmaidenHis left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the Economy.gif "Gunsmilie(1)")
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Many happy returns of the day! I am preparing a large spliff which I will enjoy in your honor shortly.Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Young man, I indulge in nothing stronger than tea.Originally posted by I Man Rastafari View Post
Please turn your heart and mind towards Jesus. You can't get any higher than heaven.
Reprovingly Yours,
HandmaidenHis left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the EconomyComment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
God created fossils to test our faith.
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My favorite LBC sermons:
True Christians are Perfect!
True Christian™ Love.
Salvation™ made Easy!
You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
God HATES Rational Thinking!
True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Happy Birthday, Dear Sister,
Had more women during the past centuries attained your level of Godly submission and servitude, we wouldn't have had to wait for two millennia for the Regime of God to re-establish itself in the form of Mr. Donald Trump. You're an example to females all over the world!
Hebrews 13:17
Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you.
May you enter Heaven soon to serve Lord Jesus Christ in Worship and domestic chores for all Eternity!
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:- Hitler is Alive!
- Hitler - the First man on the Moon!
- Hitler was maybe a Nazi!
- Hitler and the English Royal Family!
- Vladimir Putin is immortal! Perhaps Hitler is, too?
- Paris Hilton for President and the Hitler connection!
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Many happy returns, sister. I am sorry this is late but I have to prioritise my time for my nephew who is reaching the age where he's on the cusp of adulthood and needs a firm hand layed on him from time to time (and you've had several birthdays now that you must must be used to them).
But don't be down hearted: I'm sure Jesus has a good reason for not taking you to His muscular bosom. That hitch in your breath? That could be the lung flux. That pain in your back? You could be getting the birittle bones that will get you.
Jesus has SO many options for ways to take you! And if all else fails a simple botched home invasion or visiting friend's child could accidently discharge you gun into your face and mouth could send you winging your way Heavenly to sit by Jesus' side to sing His praises for ever and ever and ever and ever without a moment of pause, rest or break.
YIC1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.
Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
It's nice to have something to look forward to.Originally posted by Dr Laurence Niles View Post
Optimistically Yours,
HandmaidenHis left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the EconomyComment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Thank you my Brother in Christ. Such lovely images of female domestication warm my heart but I do see a rather passionate embrace in the lower right corner.Really, it's one thing for a man's dog to greet him with such enthusiasm, but in a wife it smacks of an unseemly level of eagerness to attend to certain. . .chores, if you know whereof I speak.Originally posted by Elmer G. White View PostHappy Birthday, Dear Sister,. . .
May you enter Heaven soon to serve Lord Jesus Christ in Worship and domestic chores for all Eternity!
Still, I thank you for your kind thoughts and magnanimous approval. May I prove worthy to dust Jesus' throne someday.
Particulatematterly Yours,
HandmaidenHis left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the EconomyComment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Dear Sister Basilissa;
You are always so sweet and thoughtful. However, I do hope that you haven't served up a devil's food chocolate cake.
I will pray for you, just in case you mixed up the recipes.
Bless you, my dear.
Blissfully Yours,
HandmaidenHis left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the EconomyComment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDMAIDEN!
Since no other birthdays have occurred I will now enjoy another large spliff in your honor.Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4Comment
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