Have You started collecting stones?

[Younghotgirl]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

I'm working on collecting stones and hiding them in my clothing on the way back from school... I will have many stones that I can give to a young christian boy to use for throwing as my young arms do not have the strength to take out an infidel

[Dirk]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

As you may all know I am a big fan of stones. I have quit a collection back in the States (I will be back in the States soon, glory!) and am willing to show them to brother James. May I remind you to the following:

Freehold Summer Stoning Festival

It's an upcoming event that has been away for 5 years, but has returned to Freehold! Me and brother James are organising this festival. I did my share back here with the promotion, making my land available for the fest (You all know I own quit some land in Freehold) and arranging a few things.

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

As my Brothers and Sisters know, next month I will be arriving in America. Even though I am in the Australian Mission Chapter, I think it is important that we too show support.

This weekend I've spent much time racing around in the Church Mini-Bus, from beach to, quarry, to river and collected an assortment of stones and so far I have collected over 100 pounds of them. One problem though. My luggage allowance for my trip over there is only 40 pounds and I wanted to bring the right ones.

So, my quandary is; should I just dump the soft smooth river stones and just opt for the razor-sharp stones for "more" impact?

Please advise as this is causing me much distress.

YIC,

Mrs.P.Wintersnow.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

James Dewitt

Brother James, There is wisdom in what you say and it might be the time for stockpiling. My problem is that , as you might be aware,is my only residence is presently my Winnebago, until I can afford my move to Freehold (ie when I settle my law suit with Toyota). I have limited space to stockpile stones so I will have to settle for quality not quantity. What is considered the perfect projectile? Should I worry about weight, size or is shape the most important consideration? How long will we really have after the election before these godless secular laws are repealed ?
Have you heard of any other congregations, like Westboro, that have begun stockpiling as well?
Can you think of any other things that might go short after the election?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

Amen to all this Brothers. It seems that the Holy Ghost is preparing us for something big! Let's all pray over this.

I'd like to see a few of our creation scientists take on the task of improving stoning techniques. Bringing them into the 20th century, so to speak. There's nothing in the Good Book against that.

Praise Jesus. The stone age is coming!

[Jedediah]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

I have a large assortment of stones I collected while on pilgrimage to the Holy Land during my studies in Young Earth Geology. With the Tea Party and Reconstructionist candidates like Rand Paul gaining momentum, it is only a matter of time before Osamba's socialism is replaced with Biblical Law, and it will be up to us True Christians™ to mete out God's Righteous Judgment!

This may even turn into a lucrative enterprise for us at Landover Baptist, as there are very few congregations of perfect, sin-free True Christians™ holy enough to initiate a stoning in the nation.

John 8:7
So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

I propose that we ask local church governments for a generous love offering for every stoning we initiate in righteousness.

[Ofc. Don W. Richards]

Re: Have You started collecting stones?

This would really make my day. I've still got my old soft ball arm. They used to call me Don "The Cannon" Richards.

I bet that I could put a sinner out of his misery with a single throw. I hope to be able to do so someday soon!

Imagine if, instead of leaving them to eat up our tax money in jail, the FPD could just drag sinners to the middle of the street and invite people to start hurtling rocks, bricks, and whatever other hard materials they could find at guilty parties! Praise God!

[James Dewitt]

Brothers and Sisters, with the up and coming Presidential election it is my hope that stoning will be become lawful in all 50 states. God has given us clear direction on how to handle sinners. It is rather unfortunate that the wishes of our founding fathers have gone by the wayside. This great nation was built on the principles that God gave to us. God makes it quote clear how we should handle people who DO NOT follow his word. Brothers and Sisters it is my prayer that Brother Huckabee and Sister Palin will gain the Office of President and Vice President of the US of A. Upon their coronation , it is my hope and dreams that that law of the land will be that of God Himself has given to us in the Holy KJV1611.

Exodus 19:13
There shall not an hand touch it, but he shall surely be stoned, or shot through; whether it be beast or man, it shall not live: when the trumpet soundeth long, they shall come up to the mount.

Numbers 15:36
And all the congregation brought him without the camp, and stoned him with stones, and he died; as the LORD commanded Moses.

Joshua 7:25
And Joshua said, Why hast thou troubled us? the LORD shall trouble thee this day. And all Israel stoned him with stones, and burned them with fire, after they had stoned them with stones.

1 Kings 12:18
Then king Rehoboam sent Adoram, who was over the tribute; and all Israel stoned him with stones, that he died. Therefore king Rehoboam made speed to get him up to his chariot, to flee to Jerusalem.

2 Chronicles 24:21
And they conspired against him, and stoned him with stones at the commandment of the king in the court of the house of the LORD.

Matthew 21:35
And the husbandmen took his servants, and beat one, and killed another, and stoned another.

John 8:5
Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

2 Corinthians 11:25
Thrice was I beaten with rods, once was I stoned, thrice I suffered shipwreck, a night and a day I have been in the deep;

Hebrews 11:37
They were stoned, they were sawn asunder, were tempted, were slain with the sword: they wandered about in sheepskins and goatskins; being destitute, afflicted, tormented;

Brothers and Sisters, I tell you this. Start collecting stones today. There will come a time when we will have a stone shortage, BE PREPAIRED , don't be caught short handed. YIC James Dewitt