[Anne Sayne]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Why couldn't the gay man cross the street?
He couldn't go straight!
(However he will go straight to hell if he doesn't repent!)

[Billy Tucan]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What's the similarity between Santa and Jesus? Only children believe they're real

[I Man Rastafari]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What's the similarity between Santa and Jesus? Only children believe they're real

Greetings Mr. Billy Tucan. I am also a Black man and I have found many friends on this forum. I think the white people who own this forum are as thirsty for diversity as it seems everyone in Babylon is. I believe they will be happy to see another Black man among them but I fear they will rebuke you for being a liar and let me be the first to rebuke you. Your profile says you are a pastor and you do not believe in Jesus. This is difficult to reconcile.

In my own country which is Jamaica almost everyone is Black. There are people who lie but not many. In Babylon the Black man has the reputation of being a lazy scheming liar and a stealer of pies. As a Black man I find it offensive to see another Black man who steals or lies because I believe it delays the time that the Black man will again rule the world as Jah intended. If you are honest with these Baptists they will embrace you as they have me.

Jah Guide
Trevor

[Anne Sayne]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What's the similarity between Santa and Jesus? Only children believe they're real

Hello Billy,
I believe you're on the wrong forum. Please go to the introduction forum and introduce yourself like any decent person would do. Also, stop mocking Jesus!

[Segoosuoia]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

And this is why a lot of Christians don't like atheists. Coming on a Christian forum and ridiculing our faith just makes you sound like a troll. Some of these militant atheists are just as bad as the militant Christians. Okay I'll step off the soapbox now.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

And this is why a lot of Christians don't like atheists. Coming on a Christian forum and ridiculing our faith just makes you sound like a troll. Some of these militant atheists are just as bad as the militant Christians. Okay I'll step off the soapbox now.

What a quaint little soapbox that was. Thank you for sharing. Would you be so kind as to explain what a "militant Christian" is? Are you referring to the Crusades,




or how the New World was cleaned up of riff-raff and given the Good News?

[Segoosuoia]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I'm referring to how atheists stereotype Christians as being hateful and trying to shove their beliefs down people's throats, and then they go and do the same exact thing. I've been on YouTube videos where there will be a song or a message or whatever, and there's always someone who has nothing better to do making stupid comments about how only an idiot would believe in God and calling Him "the imaginary friend in the sky" or something equally disrespectful.

[Basilissa]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I'm referring to how atheists stereotype Christians as being hateful and trying to shove their beliefs down people's throats, and then they go and do the same exact thing. I've been on YouTube videos where there will be a song or a message or whatever, and there's always someone who has nothing better to do making stupid comments about how only an idiot would believe in God and calling Him "the imaginary friend in the sky" or something equally disrespectful.

I know, right?! That's just utterly ridiculous! We know He's not imaginary (the Bible tells us so), and we know he's not our friend (a friend would not cast us to eternal damnation for a single tiny offense, James 2:10), and we know He's everywhere, not just in the sky!

Atheists are so dumb!

Psalm 14:1 The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Why are Jewish men circumcised?

Because Jewish women won't touch anything that isn't 10% off.

[Des]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What is the difference between a Jew and a pot roast?


People get upset when you burn a pot roast.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Pastor told this one at Sunday services:


A Jew, a Mormon, and a True Christian(TM) all dared each other to jump over a candlestick with a three ft. high flame.


"I'll go first!" said the True Christian(TM) and he went through unscathed.


The Jew was next to go. He was engulfed in flames and died almost instantly. .


Next went the Mormon. He, too, went through the flame without incident. This puzzled the True Christian(TM). "How did you do that?" he inquired.


The Mormon smirked and said, "Asbestos magic underwear!"
Of course, the Mormon died a few months later of mesothelioma.

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

One rainy night after a few too many beers down at the road house, Pastor Dewitt Prejean over in Iberia Parish came home and got into an argument with his wife Carrie Ann and she got mad and drove off into the rainy night. Pastor Dewitt wasn't too worried because that kind of thing happened on a pretty regular basis. After a while Pastor Dewitt crawled into bed and slept like a log until about sunup. He wasn't real surprised that Carrie Ann wasn't there because she usually went to her mamma's house when she got mad.


That afternoon when Carrie Ann still hadn't come back, Pastor Dewitt called over to mamma's house and she hadn't seen her at all. Dewitt was concerned and he called the sheriff to report Carrie Ann missing. Deputy Robichaux came out and took the report and said he'd be in touch.


The deputy didn't call that night at all but he came back the next morning and knocked at the screen door. Pastor Dewitt came out on the porch and Deputy Robichaux told him he had some bad news and he had some good news. Pastor Dewitt said to go on and give him the bad news first. The deputy said he was sorry but he had to tell Dewitt that Carrie Ann drove off the bridge into the bayou and she was drowned. They had found her floating about 100 yards from the bridge.


The Pastor was shocked and he broke down in tears. The deputy said he was very sorry and that the coroner would be getting in touch with Pastor Dewitt the next day. The Pastor asked what the delay was for and the deputy brightened right up. He smiled and said that brings him to the good news. She had twelve big blue crabs on her he said and they were going to float her again that evening.

[Des]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

One rainy night after a few too many beers down at the road house, Pastor Dewitt Prejean over in Iberia Parish came home and got into an argument with his wife Carrie Ann and she got mad and drove off into the rainy night. Pastor Dewitt wasn't too worried because that kind of thing happened on a pretty regular basis. After a while Pastor Dewitt crawled into bed and slept like a log until about sunup. He wasn't real surprised that Carrie Ann wasn't there because she usually went to her mamma's house when she got mad.


That afternoon when Carrie Ann still hadn't come back, Pastor Dewitt called over to mamma's house and she hadn't seen her at all. Dewitt was concerned and he called the sheriff to report Carrie Ann missing. Deputy Robichaux came out and took the report and said he'd be in touch.


The deputy didn't call that night at all but he came back the next morning and knocked at the screen door. Pastor Dewitt came out on the porch and Deputy Robichaux told him he had some bad news and he had some good news. Pastor Dewitt said to go on and give him the bad news first. The deputy said he was sorry but he had to tell Dewitt that Carrie Ann drove off the bridge into the bayou and she was drowned. They had found her floating about 100 yards from the bridge.


The Pastor was shocked and he broke down in tears. The deputy said he was very sorry and that the coroner would be getting in touch with Pastor Dewitt the next day. The Pastor asked what the delay was for and the deputy brightened right up. He smiled and said that brings him to the good news. She had twelve big blue crabs on her he said and they were going to float her again that evening.

I'm sorry, Brother Moss, but I don't get this one. Why was Pastor Dewitt crying? Was the missus driving his favorite car?

[Red Army]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

After Stalin’s death, the Soviet nation decided to get rid of him once and for all and bury him as far away as possible. They set up a special commission.
The commission turned to the British government with the request that they make available a plot in a British cemetery.
“Well,” replies the British government, ”we do already have Karl Marx in England … Two such great masters in the one cemetery . . . That would be overdoing it a bit…”
So they tried the Germans.
”Well, we would bury him here,’ reply the Germans, ‘but Hitler is already buried here. Two such great tyrants in the one country …”
Suddenly there arrived a telegram from Tel Aviv: ”In view of the fact that Stalin did not block the creation of the state of Israel, we agree to bury him here.”
”No way,” said the members of the commission in sudden panic. ”No way. After all they had a resurrection there …’”

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

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