[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

When a born again Christian tells a story about going to Heaven during a near death experience, it is always true. When it happens to a Pastafarian, it is just a psychotic delusion. That is because the God they worship doesn't exist. Ours does. See how obvious the difference is? It is so tangible and accessible to people. Non-believers truly deserve eternal damnation.

[DDM1985]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

one of my friends had this kind of experience back in the 80's but...he was abducted by soviets...


freddie you should check that the russians havn't implanted a probe in your rectum....


yours in christ
-peter

That sounds like an incredibly horrible experience...

It almost made me throw up.

Why would Russians even have an interest in that kind of thing?!

[DDM1985]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

When a born again Christian tells a story about going to Heaven during a near death experience, it is always true. When it happens to a Pastafarian, it is just a psychotic delusion. That is because the God they worship doesn't exist. Ours does. See how obvious the difference is? It is so tangible and accessible to people. Non-believers truly deserve eternal damnation.

Good point. It's like the other "gods" that are man-made... except this one can be eaten. Seriously, why would anybody worship food? I don't get it. Food is for eating... not worshipping

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

When a born again Christian tells a story about going to Heaven during a near death experience, it is always true. When it happens to a Pastafarian, it is just a psychotic delusion.

I did not have a near death experience, resulting in a delusional episode. The event did not just happen within my imagination, there is photographic evidence of the aftermath of me being taken, my partner was there when Our Lord took me to The Volcano.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

Good point. It's like the other "gods" that are man-made... except this one can be eaten. Seriously, why would anybody worship food? I don't get it. Food is for eating... not worshipping

Let The Holy Text explain...
FAQ 64-74

Frequently Asked: “Well, one aspect of other religions you do have is a god. Who happens to be made of pasta. Isn't it sorta wrong to eat what He's made of?”
And the Dalai Llama Answered: “Eat some of this bread instead, and wash it down with this wine, then.”
Frequently Asked: “What?”
And the Dalai Llama Answered: “The Flying Spaghetti Monster is not pasta, but a deity who chooses to represent Himself as pasta. If you like Pasta, go ahead and eat some. He doesn'tmind, because the Sharing of the Pasta is a form of worship. Especially the sharing part. Transubstantiation is not part of Pastafarian doctrine. That means when you eat Pasta, you aren't eating Him, but eating Pasta.”

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

I did not have a near death experience, resulting in a delusional episode. The event did not just happen within my imagination, there is photographic evidence of the aftermath of me being taken, my partner was there when Our Lord took me to The Volcano.

I am not interested in hearing about your delusions of salvation. Only True Christians™ can be saved. Not noodle worshiping Pastafarians. I have already explained the vast difference between your religion and the Truth©. The difference is that your God doesn't exist, and I have faith. Not only that, but there are huge mountains of decisive evidence that my God exists, while everyone knows that spaghetti does not fly unless you are throwing it at your wife as punishment for screwing it up, not that I would every eat a false idol like spaghetti. The evidence for my God has been documented in the KJV Bible, and also by scientists such as Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron. Haven't you ever seen a banana before? A banana proves that God exists, but a bowl of spaghetti does not. Spaghetti was created by Satan to deceive you.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

I did not have a near death experience, resulting in a delusional episode.

Your experience was more likely to be a delusional episode resulting in a near death experience, Mr Freddie!

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

Is this thread still active? I leave and come back all the time. It's called going to the toilet.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

I am not interested in hearing about your delusions of salvation. Only True Christians™ can be saved. Not noodle worshiping Pastafarians. I have already explained the vast difference between your religion and the Truth. The difference is that your God doesn't exist, and I have faith. Not only that, but there are huge mountains of decisive evidence that my God exists, while everyone knows that spaghetti does not fly unless you are throwing it at your wife as punishment for screwing it up, not that I would every eat a false idol like spaghetti. The evidence for my God has been documented in the KJV Bible, and also by scientists such as Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron. Haven't you ever seen a banana before? A banana proves that God exists, but a bowl of spaghetti does not. Spaghetti was created by Satan to deceive you.

I do not dispute that God exists, as for the work of any scientist, they are all playthings of Our Lord, he uses his Noodly appendage to adjust any result to that, which for some reason, amuses Him.

Yet again you display you inability to understand a simple concept, God is NOT Pasta, Pasta is NOT God, God CHOOSES to represent himself as Pasta, and gave us the means to make Pasta and Noodles so we could make a simple nutritional meal, that we can share with others to honour Him.

You worship a very insecure god of hate, vengeance, violence, jealousy amongst other less then noble traits, a being that is not worthy of our love & respect.

I worship a God of Love, OK he his a little absent minded at times and takes his eye of the ball from time to time, but that just makes Him all the more Loveable.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

I do not dispute that God exists, as for the work of any scientist, they are all playthings of Our Lord, he uses his Noodly appendage to adjust any result to that, which for some reason, amuses Him.

Yet again you display you inability to understand a simple concept, God is NOT Pasta, Pasta is NOT God, God CHOOSES to represent himself as Pasta, and gave us the means to make Pasta and Noodles so we could make a simple nutritional meal, that we can share with others to honour Him.

You worship a very insecure god of hate, vengeance, violence, jealousy amongst other less then noble traits, a being that is not worthy of our love & respect.

I worship a God of Love, OK he his a little absent minded at times and takes his eye of the ball from time to time, but that just makes Him all the more Loveable.

PROVE your' god exists Jo Freddie.

It should be easy. Just give us a Bible quote.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

PROVE your' god exists Jo Freddie.

It should be easy. Just give us a Bible quote.

Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster, if you can prove that Jesus is not the Son of the FSM there is a prize waiting for you to claim.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster does in deed speak though your Bible, as I have pointed out MANY times before.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster, if you can prove that Jesus is not the Son of the FSM there is a prize waiting for you to claim.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster does in deed speak though your Bible, as I have pointed out MANY times before.

You can hide in your dark closet of ignorance all you want, Mr. Freddie, running with sea-faring gangsters, doing marijuana, engaging in anal sex... but God isn't fooled. You are fooling yourself.

I'm telling you, spaghetti doesn't exist. God exists.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

You can hide in your dark closet of ignorance all you want, Mr. Freddie, running with sea-faring gangsters, doing marijuana, engaging in anal sex... but God isn't fooled. You are fooling yourself.

Still choosing to ignore the possibility that God is the flying Spaghetti Monster BB, I will repeat...

Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster

I'm telling you, spaghetti doesn't exist. God exists.

Then what is this?

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

Then what is this?

Some demonic ectoplasm or something. God is the only thing worthy of your attention, Jo Pasta. Stop sinning and throw yourself to the ground in sublime adoration for the invisible and omnipotent God who surreptitiously causes so many events with otherwise perfectly natural explanations. Feed yourself with the nourishing Blood of Christ, not the foulness of spaghettios or whatever other abominations you pirates consume.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone!

God is the only thing worthy of your attention, Jo Pasta. Stop sinning and throw yourself to the ground in sublime adoration for the invisible and omnipotent God who surreptitiously causes so many events with otherwise perfectly natural explanations.

I do not dispute the existence of God or how awesome He is, just who he is!

Still choosing to ignore the possibility that God is the flying Spaghetti Monster BB, I will repeat...

Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster