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  • Ezekiel Bathfire
    Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
    Christ's Rottweiler
     
    • Jan 2008
    • 22899

    #31
    Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

    Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
    As a black metrosexual, you could imagine that I am confused.

    But as it stands I am Still going to be the new Minister.
    I don't see the temperature in Hell dropping much and my pig's still firmly attached to the ground.
    sigpic


    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

    Comment

    • Al_Sharpton
      Unsaved trash
       
      • Mar 2008
      • 53

      #32
      Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

      Originally posted by Ahimaaz Smith
      [...] But we do love you.

      Amen brother, lets spread this praise of the lord.
      Landover's Newest African American Minister. Worship an African Jesus!

      "O lord, why is thy heaven so bright? and the lord returned: If it was dark, you would not be able to see my form for I am a man like you, only with the color of the night"

      Comment

      • Ezekiel Bathfire
        Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
        Christ's Rottweiler
         
        • Jan 2008
        • 22899

        #33
        Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

        Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
        Amen brother, lets spread this praise of the lord.
        Just a point of politeness and honor - The Lord's name is always captialized as His pronoun.
        sigpic


        “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

        Author of such illuminating essays as,
        Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

        Comment

        • Rabbi_Abe_Goldstein
          Unsaved trash
          Under Investigation
          • Mar 2008
          • 22

          #34
          Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

          Originally posted by Deaner View Post
          Oh boy, here we go; the persecuted Jew song and dance. How come when everybody tells you to take your disgusting religion elsewhere you accuse them of persecuting you. You have to realize that we don't believe the first step towards God is mutilating your penis.
          How much of my money would sway you to cut off your mullet? Does your religion require the mutilation of your hair?
          "I don't believe in Jesus."

          Comment

          • Remy Lebeau
            LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire
            President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association
            Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2006
            • 2058

            #35
            Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

            Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
            As a black metrosexual, you could imagine that I am confused.

            But as it stands I am Still going to be the new Minister.
            Please tell me that you, a buck nigra psuedo preacher, don't honestly believe that you are righteous enough to preach to God's Choosen people. Your name isn't even listed as an Ex-Negro alumni. And quite frankly I'm not at all happy with your conversations with Sister Talitha. I know how you bucks think when it comes to white women and I'm gonna let you know right this instant that you stand no chance at all of ever getting into her holy panties.

            Hit the road, boy. Unless your applying for a job as a church lobby shoe shiner assistant(we already have a show shiner) you have no reason to be here.
            Master of Godly Debating

            Latest Conquest:Sacred Heart

            Debate Record
            Currently Undefeated
            Lastest Debates:
            Catholic - Not Christian: Former Altar Boy/Molestation Victim with "Stockholm Syndrome" admits catholicism is false
            James Peter: Idiotic Catholic Retard Thwarted
            Vayhr of the Warhost: Unrepentant wigger struck down.
            Teflon: See the post that nailed him.
            86 Victories
            0 Defeats

            Past Victories (Archive):
            Uppity Atheist Pagan Witch finally keels over and DIES. America Wins Again!!!
            Uppity feeble minded witch needs to be taught how to debate
            Racist Nazi Feminazi Bulldyke CRUSHED in debate

            Comment

            • Al_Sharpton
              Unsaved trash
               
              • Mar 2008
              • 53

              #36
              Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

              I am a black man yes.

              A womanizer no and adulterer. NO.

              Your mind has gone too far.
              Landover's Newest African American Minister. Worship an African Jesus!

              "O lord, why is thy heaven so bright? and the lord returned: If it was dark, you would not be able to see my form for I am a man like you, only with the color of the night"

              Comment

              • Remy Lebeau
                LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire
                President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association
                Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 2058

                #37
                Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
                I am a black man yes.

                A womanizer no and adulterer. NO.
                That's an oxymoron. You can't be "black" and at the same time not a womanizer. Unless you are a manizer. Are you a homer, Mr. Thurmond?
                Master of Godly Debating

                Latest Conquest:Sacred Heart

                Debate Record
                Currently Undefeated
                Lastest Debates:
                Catholic - Not Christian: Former Altar Boy/Molestation Victim with "Stockholm Syndrome" admits catholicism is false
                James Peter: Idiotic Catholic Retard Thwarted
                Vayhr of the Warhost: Unrepentant wigger struck down.
                Teflon: See the post that nailed him.
                86 Victories
                0 Defeats

                Past Victories (Archive):
                Uppity Atheist Pagan Witch finally keels over and DIES. America Wins Again!!!
                Uppity feeble minded witch needs to be taught how to debate
                Racist Nazi Feminazi Bulldyke CRUSHED in debate

                Comment

                • Al_Sharpton
                  Unsaved trash
                   
                  • Mar 2008
                  • 53

                  #38
                  Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                  Lebeau, I cannot respect you. You are afraid of me.
                  Landover's Newest African American Minister. Worship an African Jesus!

                  "O lord, why is thy heaven so bright? and the lord returned: If it was dark, you would not be able to see my form for I am a man like you, only with the color of the night"

                  Comment

                  • Remy Lebeau
                    LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire
                    President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association
                    Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
                    True Christian™
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 2058

                    #39
                    Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                    Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
                    Lebeau, I cannot respect you. You are afraid of me.
                    Nigra don't respect anyone. That's why it's so easy for them to steal, kill, and rape.

                    Jesus protects me from your nigra tendacies so I have no reason to fear you. However, all unsaved white women outside of our gates have ample reason to fear you.
                    Master of Godly Debating

                    Latest Conquest:Sacred Heart

                    Debate Record
                    Currently Undefeated
                    Lastest Debates:
                    Catholic - Not Christian: Former Altar Boy/Molestation Victim with "Stockholm Syndrome" admits catholicism is false
                    James Peter: Idiotic Catholic Retard Thwarted
                    Vayhr of the Warhost: Unrepentant wigger struck down.
                    Teflon: See the post that nailed him.
                    86 Victories
                    0 Defeats

                    Past Victories (Archive):
                    Uppity Atheist Pagan Witch finally keels over and DIES. America Wins Again!!!
                    Uppity feeble minded witch needs to be taught how to debate
                    Racist Nazi Feminazi Bulldyke CRUSHED in debate

                    Comment

                    • Al_Sharpton
                      Unsaved trash
                       
                      • Mar 2008
                      • 53

                      #40
                      Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                      www.blackpeopleinthebible.com


                      Enough Said.
                      Landover's Newest African American Minister. Worship an African Jesus!

                      "O lord, why is thy heaven so bright? and the lord returned: If it was dark, you would not be able to see my form for I am a man like you, only with the color of the night"

                      Comment

                      • Pastor Ezekiel
                        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                         
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 78556

                        #41
                        Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                        Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
                        Please refrain from posting your demonic websights on our Godly forum.
                        Who Will Jesus Damn?

                        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • Ahimaaz Smith
                          True Christian™
                          True Christian™
                          • Nov 2007
                          • 2549

                          #42
                          Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                          Originally posted by Rabbi_Abe_Goldstein View Post
                          How much of my money would sway you to cut off your mullet? Does your religion require the mutilation of your hair?
                          It's always about money with you people, isn't it?

                          Originally posted by Al_Sharpton View Post
                          A womanizer no
                          I always suspected Sharpie was gay, but this proves it.

                          Pour out thy fury upon the heathen that know thee not, and upon the families that call not on thy name.... Jeremiah 10:25

                          Comment

                          • Cheshire
                            True Christian™
                            True Christian™
                            • Jan 2008
                            • 213

                            #43
                            Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                            So THIS is what happens when I leave for a few days! Some uppity negro pie stealing boy thinks he can sodomize and rape his way into this GODLY church?

                            I really hsould stop taking long breaks..
                            Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things!

                            Comment

                            • One-eyed Jack
                              True Christian™
                              True Christian™
                              • Nov 2007
                              • 1092

                              #44
                              Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                              We should remember Al Sharpton's credentials.

                              He is a notorious jailbird, imprisoned for a 90-day sentence for common trespassing. (With intent to commit voyeuristic crimes against the US Navy, no less! No one gets away with spying on the private acts of US Naval officers banging away in Puerto Rico.)

                              He supports the gay and lesbian lifestyles, believes in same-sex marriage, and is in favor of raising transexual ministers with two penii to the pulpit. (Sorry, ladies, but these things have to be said.) He wants the government to distribute condoms to highschool children, cocaine to gradeschoolers, and clean underwear to his homies. He is a nappy-haired, dusky-skinned, trouble-makin', melon-theivin' jigaboo who might as well have a chicken bone through his nose...never mind all his civilized and even debonair manner.

                              Be not fooled by his literate style, his slyly correct grammar. Pay no attention to his (mostly) correct spelling, and his apparent cleanliness.

                              Just remember, he was preaching Pentacostalism at the age of four!

                              Be very, very wary of this ravening black wolf in lambskin!

                              ~~ OEJ

                              PS: No offense, of course, Mister Sharpton. No offense.

                              Comment

                              • Youth Pastor Marty
                                True Christian™
                                True Christian™
                                • Sep 2006
                                • 365

                                #45
                                Re: Al Sharpton, Landover's Newest Minister to be!

                                This Negro was a dishwasher here at Landover ages ago. He stole all of his Bible knowlege from the late Pastor Ebeneezer Smith. I have doubts about his authenticity anyway, since it would surprise me that he could even type simple English.

                                Matthew 13:41-43 The Son of man shall send forth his angels, and they shall gather out of his kingdom all things that offend, and them which do iniquity; And shall cast them into a furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. Then shall the righteous shine forth as the sun in the kingdom of their Father. Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.

                                Comment

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