[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

Say WHAT??????
And just what are your sources for THAT lovely piece of info, Pastor?

You have confessed all of this to me in the late hours when you were drinking tequila shooters with beer chasers. You SAY you don't like beer, but.......

[SUV]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

Take heart, Congregation. His poetry is improving.

Thank you, Mrs. Rogers.

You know, I admire your wisdom and do accept your guidances.

Am struggling, all my pitiful life, to strike that fine balance between

gallantry and Godliness. I open doors. I put the seat up, then down.

Help me, Mrs Rogers. By this time next month (if I survive Investigation),

I hope to have improved to the point where I may be depended upon

to leave the seat down and moistened. You do me

so much good, Mrs. Rogers. You're the Inspiration for my Investigation.

Mrs. Rogers, you scanned the Bible for us. A gift, Mrs. Rogers; you!



I resolve to begin at the beginning. It's why I am here. To redeem

decades wasted in Congregationalism.



Peter
serious

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

Yeuchhh!!! I'm glad my husband's a heathen like me, if he ever used the 'Wash method', I'd be making him go to the bathroom on the lawn (of our apartment block, so even worse!)
Sheesh, and you doubt evolution. You've very aptly illustrated the resemblance people can have to animals. Even monkeys do their business neater than you!!

Oh so the idea your husband is spraying his spunk around your bathroom like a tom cat from marathon self pollutio sessions is something to be proud off Rachael??? Pagan homes are probably the only place were the old warning that a woman could get pregnant from a toilet seat is true.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

You have confessed all of this to me in the late hours when you were drinking tequila shooters with beer chasers. You SAY you don't like beer, but.......

You assured me that was all going to be kept in the strictest confidence!! Hmph, guess one can't take the word of a landover baptist then!

Oh so the idea your husband is spraying his spunk around your bathroom like a tom cat from marathon self pollutio sessions is something to be proud off Rachael??? Pagan homes are probably the only place were the old warning that a woman could get pregnant from a toilet seat is true.

He doesn't do that. Lookit, just because YOU do those things, doesn't mean you can accuse all other men of being the same way. Besides, we heathen women are not like your robot-wives who just cook and clean. We see to ALL the needs of our men

And besides, the whole 'Wash method' is utterly repulsive. You'd rather have waste all over the bathroom than using simple aim? Animals, the whole lot of you! Can't even do what any monkey could do!

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

You assured me that was all going to be kept in the strictest confidence!!

Yes, and it would have if you had kept up with your blackm.....tithes.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

Yes, and it would have if you had kept up with your blackm.....tithes.

You do not play fair, dear Pastor.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

And besides, the whole 'Wash method' is utterly repulsive. You'd rather have waste all over the bathroom than using simple aim? Animals, the whole lot of you! Can't even do what any monkey could do!

That's why I have Mexican servants, they can clean up the mess after anyone uses the bathroom in my Christian house. And by the way just like any house in Freehold my house is inspected Monthly by the Landover Spiritual Hygiene Service for signs of self pollution and I have passed every time.

Deny all you want Rachael; Jesus knows your over stimulated husband could never resist the temptation to indulge in self love anytime his hand gets near his throbbing man meat. Only pure TRUE Christians(tm) with Jesus' help have that kind of will power.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

That's why I have Mexican servants, they can clean up the mess after anyone uses the bathroom in my Christian house. And by the way just like any house in Freehold my house is inspected Monthly by the Landover Spiritual Hygiene Service for signs of self pollution and I have passed every time.

And I bet it's because you have that new vacuum cleaner, isn't it BJ?

Deny all you want Rachael; Jesus knows your over stimulated husband could never resist the temptation to indulge in self love anytime his hand gets near his throbbing man meat. Only pure TRUE Christians(tm) with Jesus' help have that kind of will power.

Like I said, I can tend to his needs any time, so he doesn't need to do what you obviously need to!
The fact is, I doubt that when a guy is needing to urinate he'd be thinking about self-stimulation! He'd be thinking about needing to take a leak!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

I am bumping this thread for Sister Anne Teak. She expressed concern this week at Bible Study that her son may be gay because he spends too much time in the bathroom and was reminded of this excellent thread.

I hope this helps Sister Anne!

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

That's disgusting - there's no way I would have my husband pissing all over the bathroom and then leaving it for me to clean up.
You should at least have the decency to clean up after yourself.

[Nobar King]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

That's disgusting - there's no way I would have my husband pissing all over the bathroom and then leaving it for me to clean up.
You should at least have the decency to clean up after yourself.

Your comment is SO helpful. I hope Sister Anne Teak sees it the same way. She's obviously struggling with raising her child, and all you can do is criticize more Godly True Christians. Shame.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

Your comment is SO helpful. I hope Sister Anne Teak sees it the same way. She's obviously struggling with raising her child, and all you can do is criticize more Godly True Christians. Shame.

I didn't say anything to her, but if her son is making a lot of trips to the bathroom, or spending inordinate amounts of time there, perhaps the problem is not his sexuality, but his diet.

And if he makes a mess in there, she ought to make him clean it up.

[Nobar King]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

You really ARE insensitive. Don't you think that if her son had a medical condition that she would have taken him to see a specialist? She's not a scientologist, you know. I'm sure she's mostly concerned about the gender orientation of her son.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

You really ARE insensitive. Don't you think that if her son had a medical condition that she would have taken him to see a specialist? She's not a scientologist, you know. I'm sure she's mostly concerned about the gender orientation of her son.

Did she ask him if he was having diarrhea or constipation? Did she ask him if he was having discomfort or difficulty urinating? Or did she just assume that the reason he was spending so much time in the bathroom was because he was fantasizing about men while masturbating in there?

[Nobar King]

Re: Going to the bathroom; a gateway to evil.

I'm sure she knows more about the situation than you do.