[Levi Jones]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Hello. We're delivering our message all the way from Iceland, where witch-hunting is completely unheard of. We're just two teenagers surfing on the internet, and actually we find this a bit disturbing (Please don't be offended.)
We don't believe in witches, or anything supernatural for that matter since one of us is very interested in logic and science. Have you actually seen any one of them perform anything that is beyond average human capabilities?
Many things that people may find unnatural can be explained in a very simple way, with science.
We are not denying the existence of god, or his will. But are you sure that you are indeed killing witches, not just normal human beings?
Again we want to ask you not to be offended, but I really don't think witches would be that easy to find.
A lot of this generation of teenagers like to dress in black, and I'm worried that you might mistake them for witches...

One only needs to look at the number of witch trials in North America to understand that the Europeans were foisting their witches upon us over here from a very early time.

Witchcraft is still rather common in the U.S. through tarot, ouija, use of demonic familiars and etc. We have to constantly thin the herds of them out, until we can eliminate it altogether.

Unfortunately, we haven't been successful in completely destroying witchcraft in over 300 years of trying.

[JennyD]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Yes it says "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." but if you would of read I said.... hunt and kill people who YOU THINK are witches

Wiccans are witches. Wicca is witchcraft. Ask any Wiccan. They have already confessed to their crimes against God.

Their foolish decision to come to Freehold, where God's laws are enforced, only goes to show how idiotic Wiccans and other witches are.

Exodus 22:29 "Do not hold back your grain offerings or wine offerings." "You must give me the oldest of your sons."

To the Lord's SERVICE, fool. Just as the grain and wine offerings were consumed by the priests, not burned up!

We don't believe in witches, or anything supernatural for that matter . . . We are not denying the existence of god, or his will.

So you don't believe in anything supernatural, but you do not deny the existence of God, whose name you can't be bothered to capitalize.

Sure.

Have you actually seen any one of them perform anything that is beyond average human capabilities?

As I just mentioned above, Wicca is witchcraft.

One does not have to cast successful spells to reject God and practice the dark arts. One merely has to take up the practice to be a witch.

However:

Phyllida Law, mother of the actress Emma Thompson, has had her stolen gargoyles returned two years after they were stolen after announcing she had put a curse on the thieves.

The figures were swiped from outside the home of Miss Law, who is also an actress, in West Hampstead, London, in August 2007.

After the theft the 77 year-old posted a warning on shrubs that a curse would be put on the thief.

Now the thief has returned the stone statues along with a hand-written note saying: "Help me please. I have been very, very ill since I stole these. Please lift the curse."

In return, the Kingdom star has put up a new sign saying: "Thank you for returning the statues. All curses lifted."

She said she had been inspired to cast the curse by her daughter's role as Professor Sybil Trelawney in the Harry Potter films.

I obviously did not make this up. SEE?


Now, Bobby-Joe, why don't you just confess that you brought all these ridiculous teenagers in here to rain on my parade, now that I've . . . er, made sure that Joe and Mary Maria Whitford's mailbox is going to be properly repaired?

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

I'm not even going to try and call everybody. Get over to Madrid up north past Polk City!!! Me and the wife were driving through and saw a light. Turned out to be a camp fire. And you won't believe the weirdo's out there. It's like 20 of em. We need backup. I got my cell's tracker on so just get out here.

[Nobar King]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

I was going to hunt down these two but there were other people around. The fat one on the left has candies placed temptingly around her bosom for attracting unsuspecting boys into her grasp:

I took this photo so that I'd be able to recognize them if I saw them later. Be careful, witches!

[Pastor Billy-Reuben]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Baiting the field behind my house with tempeh and incense seems to be doing the trick for me. I've also got speakers mounted in the corners of the field blasting "My Chemical Romance" and that is really drawing them in as well.

My youngest boy Elijah and I just sit up in a tree stand with silenced 30-06's and they are easy pickings. They don't even seem to notice when one right beside them drops.

This past weekend, we just shot one right after another until we used up all 6 boxes of ammo. Then I cut on the flood lights and switched the music over to the Statler Brothers and all the witches we didn't have the ammo for took off. When we loaded up all the carcasses, we had 60 kills. Add that to the 36 we got last weekend and we are up to 96. The Devil's birthday keeps getting closer and closer, so I'm sure next weekend will be even bigger.

On a related note, does anyone know of a good way to get patchouli off of skin? After we ran out of bullets, I wanted to put a drop on as scent thinking I could sneak up on some of the remaining witches and kill them with my rambo knife, but it came out too fast and I got way too much on me. I scrubbed in the shower for 30 minutes but Doreen still couldn't get close to me without gagging. She's a good woman though and she stuffed an earplug up each nostril so she could perform her duty as a wife.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

No one's caught me again. Surprise, surprise. Maybe Zeke would find it easier if I dressed as a bear and donned a bright pink tutu?

[JennyD]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

96? Darnit, I only have 42. Vinnie and I will have to work a little harder!

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

No one's caught me again. Surprise, surprise. Maybe Zeke would find it easier if I dressed as a bear and donned a bright pink tutu?

You insufferable harlot. If you think you're so sneaky why are you hiding out over in Jailbird Island? How about you take a little vacation to the Des Moines area. Get away from the abo stench for a few weeks.

[JennyD]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Ms. Van Hellthing, you could stay with me and my bodyguard good friend Vinnie. We'd make sure you were completely safe from any and all danger.


Sister Victory, how many points is this one worth? I'd say 50, at least, given how crafty she is.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Ms. Van Hellthing, you could stay with me and my bodyguard good friend Vinnie. We'd make sure you were completely safe from any and all danger.


Sister Victory, how many points is this one worth? I'd say 50, at least, given how crafty she is.

Protecting witches again now, are we?

I'd hate to see another accident befall you up there in the People's Republic of Oregon.

[JennyD]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Protecting witches again now, are we?

I'd hate to see another accident befall you up there in the People's Republic of Oregon.

I see you haven't been paying attention. Vinnie and I are outside Freehold at present. We're in town for the Witch Hunt and to . . . drop in on some old "friends" of mine.

[AvatarOfChaos]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Curious. just wondering when and where it'll take place in South Carolina...
I'd love to ambush a couple of mad, homicidal Christians...

[Keith]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

we dont really have halloween in my country

so no candy for me

[FoundGirlJNB]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

we dont really have halloween in my country

so no candy for me

No one cares about the opinions of unsaved foreigners!

[JennyD]

Re: WITCH HUNT 2009!

Curious. just wondering when and where it'll take place in South Carolina...
I'd love to ambush a couple of mad, homicidal Christians...

Freehold, Iowa is not in South Carolina.

I assume your avatar is really you. Would you care to check in with Sister Mary Maria and learn about Landover's Ex-Retarded program? You, like Mr. Tannor (HTannor), could become a Saved© Ex-Retard!