[Get Thee Hence!]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

She probably uses it for fornicating reasons, the filthy harlot. The poor little thing.. I say that we should send a squad to rescue it(and whatever else she keeps..) and put her in a cage, and rehabilitate her.

I think it best we ask for reinforcements before tackling this task.

Who knows what 'she' keeps in her dungeon.

God shudders at the depravity.

[Cheshire]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

I think it best we ask for reinforcements before tackling this task.

Who knows what 'she' keeps in her dungeon.

God shudders at the depravity.

For all we know, she could be keeping dogs, even men down there! She's certainly fat enough to overpower them.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

My husband would never strike or otherwise harm me - he loves me. And I don't know who this man is that you supposedly liberated from a cage, but I can assure you that the only being kept in a cage at my house is the parakeet.

Your husband would never dare beat you because you are such an abusive bully Lumpy. Decent people know fear is not the same as love.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

Lumpster,

Your poor long suffering husband has been recently released from the enclosure you made for him under the basement stairs. Please do not demean him any further.

My husband would never strike or otherwise harm me - he loves me. And I don't know who this man is that you supposedly liberated from a cage, but I can assure you that the only being kept in a cage at my house is the parakeet.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

Your husband would never dare beat you because you are such an abusive bully Lumpy. Decent people know fear is not the same as love.

Well said, Pastor!

Nothing disturbs me more than to see these so-called "religious" folk such as Muslims, in terror of making a mistake lest their demon god Allah destroy them utterly. What's wrong with these people? They could become True Christians™, and know that Jesus loves them completely and unconditionally. Then, they'd stop sinning out of love, not out of fear of a punishment. They'd strive to be pure like Jesus because of His sacrifice, not because God will cast them into eternal torture if they ignore His laws!

Really, isn't loving God much better than being afraid all the time?

What about you, Lumpy? You live in fear of Karma, or the Threefold Law, or whatever, that anything you do bad will come back to kick you in the behind. Why the fear? Just love Jesus and obey all His laws, and you'll have no more worries!

Lumpster,

Your poor long suffering husband has been recently released from the enclosure you made for him under the basement stairs. Please do not demean him any further.

Pssst . . . Will the cage fit two juveniles and an adult?

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

My dear, power of attorney?

You simply have to be committed (involuntarily) and remanded to Landover's psychiatric facility.

Silly Lumpy.

Now, about that cage . . . I may want to use it as a trap. Where can I pick it up?

Involuntary commitment is only permissible under certain extreme circumstances. And no one from the mythical town of Freehold would have the authority to order it.

[JennyD]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

Involuntary commitment is only permissible under certain extreme circumstances. And no one from the mythical town of Freehold would have the authority to order it.

Why not come visit and prove him wrong?

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

Why not come visit and prove him wrong?

It's impossible to visit a place that doesn't exist.

[Roberta]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

Another truly witty response from DW/OJ!

[Tinkerbell]

Re: Do I have the right to beat Lumpy senseless?

You have no right to beat anyone into submission. Spanking a disobediant child, I can understand, but a grown woman? No, that is simply cowardly and unjust. There are laws against it as well. It's called "Assault."