[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

And since the bible seems to be the only way to convince you people of anything, remember Babel? God made the different languages, not people.

Yes, and He did it to thwart their evil plans, so maybe that isn't the best argument that different languages are a good thing.

[Sparky]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Yes, but trying to speak a little bit of the local language will gain you respect and make people more likely to help you out

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Yes, but trying to speak a little bit of the local language will gain you respect and make people more likely to help you out

If they want my tourist dollars, they can learn my language.

[Warner S. Davidson]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Australians just love tourists.....

Why we have one of the biggest Mardi Gras in the world in Sydney every year.......people come from all over the world and its get bigger each year.

I have never been but I am reliably informed that it is like something you have never witnessed previously

Note: American tourist are particularly welcome so this might be an idea for Landover members seeking something different next vacation

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Australians just love tourists.....

Why we have one of the biggest Mardi Gras in the world in Sydney every year.......people come from all over the world and its get bigger each year.

I have never been but I am reliably informed that it is like something you have never witnessed previously

Note: American tourist are particularly welcome so this might be an idea for Landover members seeking something different next vacation

Oh Swish!! No True Christian, especially LBC Brothers and Sisters would EVER attend the Mardi Gras in Sydney (unless of course for research purposes) which usually happens between Late Feb and the first week of March each year.

I actually came onto this thread to warn them of MANY things here in Australia and what to watch out for. It IS best for them to be alert, rather than be alarmed! Especially now that a "fluffy" Christian is the Prime Minister KRudd is at the helm. Gosh, I miss the days where John Howard, an all around good guy and one of President GW Bush's best pals was running the country. Oh, I partially digress.

Just know Brothers and Sisters, now when you come, you cannot expect a viable exchange rate for the US $$. It is also an expensive place to live and to visit.

Secondly, it is best to stay in your hotel room as much as possible as stepping out will mean you are confronted with all sorts of evil debauchery, no matter what state and what city you would stay in.

I would suggest that you leave Melbourne out of the equation on all counts. They are so close to Tasmania it is not funny and I doubt any of you want to end up in any incestuous behavior (which is STANDARD activity in Tasmania). Melbourne also tend to rejoice in Gay activity. They have a game that originated there known (formerly as VFL) but now AFL. They have even tried to pass their gayness onto other states by claiming it is AUSTRALIA WIDE interest.

Sydney.. well The mardi gras is just PROOF of their antics.

Queensland: One would think it obvious that homosexual activity would be standard, given the name and all, but in the main, the only thing to worry about in any capacity, is the deadly insects and sea life. Steve Irwin- thank the lord is now dead and in hell, so that is one less worry, but just know his offspring are still here and continue to do his "works" ANY child named after a prickling weed (bindi) has to be the work of satan himself!!

If any of you do want to venture here, despite the above eye-opening information, please don't hesitate to contact me via PM. I do have a great travel agent who looks out only for the most wholesome activities, but also makes sure you have great time!

YIC,

WS

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Australians just love tourists.....

Note: American tourist are particularly welcome so this might be an idea for Landover members seeking something different next vacation

I guess you're unaware of our wildly successful Mission to Australia a couple of summers ago. Too bad you missed it, but you can read about it and see the pictures HERE.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

When in a foreign land like Hawaii or Australia while surfing, make sure you paddle out faster to get the waves the locals are seeking. I mean, you are the guest and you are an American. You should get to go first. They can surf those waves any day.


Don't forget to travel to Mexico armed. It is a dangerous place. You should walk down the streets with your pistol strapped to your belt in a holster to let those spics know you mean business.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Here's some more country specific tips.

When in Canada, refer to them as the "51st State" or "America's Hat". They love to be thought of as one of us!

In Ireland, if you visit a pub, don't have any of their stouts. Order a Budweiser and show you're proud to be an American.

In China, if you start making random chink sounds like "Wang ching dong lo pan chung", you're bound, by probability, to actually say something that makes sense. Helps with the language barrier.

In Brazil, it might be helpful to brush up on some Spanish phrases before you go.

[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

When visiting Scotland remark on how well everyone speaks English and that you can almost understand them sometemes. The Scots loved to be compared to our more sophisticated southern neighbours.

Also make sure you get your genealogy traced back to the Jacobites and have a kilt made in Mel Gibson tartan.

The Scots also love tourists saying 'Och Aye' and mentionuing that Scotty was the best Star Trek character.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Here's some more country specific tips.

When in Canada, refer to them as the "51st State" or "America's Hat". They love to be thought of as one of us!

In Ireland, if you visit a pub, don't have any of their stouts. Order a Budweiser and show you're proud to be an American.

In China, if you start making random chink sounds like "Wang ching dong lo pan chung", you're bound, by probability, to actually say something that makes sense. Helps with the language barrier.

In Brazil, it might be helpful to brush up on some Spanish phrases before you go.

I travel to the Ornament once a month. I speak only American, the slopes seem to enjoy the challenge. When in Japland I make the chef cook hamburgers from prime Kobe beef. They seem to enjoy it. Oh and always tell them to cook your fish, its the American way.
In England remind them that with out our help they would be speaking German. Drive on the correct side of the road, dont worry the other drives will adapt in a hurry.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

My motto is:

Do not ye risk
The dark continents abroad
The further from Freehold
The further from God™

(the end)

[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

My motto is:

Do not ye risk
The dark continents abroad
The further from Freehold
The further from God™

(the end)

Blessed art thou who art fortunate enough to live by that tenet sister.

Some of us are stuck here. (Abroad)
And brother Dewitt's livelihood depends on abroad too.


YIC, McUinnean, of that abroad Ilk.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Blessed art thou who art fortunate enough to live by that tenet sister.

Some of us are stuck here. (Abroad)
And brother Dewitt's livelihood depends on abroad too.


YIC, McUinnean, of that abroad Ilk.

I do have business interests in foreign lands, but I do not do business with broads, just men.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

Blessed art thou who art fortunate enough to live by that tenet sister. Some of us are stuck here. (Abroad)

That is a tragedy. You are such a firm and devout True Christian™ I sometimes forget you are outside our gates.

I have half a mind to risk it all and borrow Brother DeWitt's jet to fly over there to overhaul your cottage in True Red White & Blue Patriotic Fashion. It would remind all visitors where your sympathy lies, and also serve as a daily inspiration to you as to what your blessed future holds.
.

[Johannes Kirkeholm]

Re: Brother Levi's guide to the American traveling abroad.

If any of you True Americans(tm) ever need to travel to lowly Denmarkistan for some reason let me advise you to buy a zipperless rubber suit like this one:



This suit could possibly save you from being raped by a gang of Denmarkian sodomites. Most Denmarkians are really lazy and if they have a hard time getting your clothes off they will just give up and rape something else.