Manly Men Rejoice! Being fat saves your life!

[Ofc. Don W. Richards]

Fat men more likely to survive car crash

Researchers at the University of Michigan Transportation Institute have found that heavy men with a body mass index of 35-50 have a 22% LOWER chance of dying in a car crash than skinny wimpy men.

As an Officer of the Law, I have always adhered to the strictest physical and dietary disciplines. Despite being a bit tubby in appearance, I'm all muscle underneath.

I once backed a cruiser into a fire hydrant and I hardly felt a thing, so I can attest to the validity of this article's findings.

What is very interesting, and obvious proof of an Intelligent Designer, is that this does not apply to the weaker sex, women. Ladies of a BMI range between 35 to 50 are 10% more likely to die in a crash than normal women. God wants you to stay petite and AWAY from the steering wheel, gals.

Us Godly Southern Baptists may get picked on for our substantial girth, but in the end it's us and the Lord that will have the last laugh when one of those scrawny, malnourished vegetarians gets his (or her) itty bitty hybrid smashed in by one of our SUVs. Praise God!

[HTannor]

Re: Manly Men Rejoice! Being fat saves your life!

Wonderful find, Officer Don, but somewhat troubling.

By bringing this to my attention, I will be forced to re-evaluate by physique.

I am 6’-3”, 225 pounds, washboard abs, and less than 2% body fat. But don’t take my word for it, here’s the proof:




Since I like to be one with nature, I have only a moped for my transportation needs. I’m wondering whether colliding with another motor vehicle would endanger me because I lack the additional mass to absorb the blunt force trauma.

Perhaps we can get together tomorrow at your family-owned donut shop and discuss this startling new information in greater depth. (I will gladly pay for your first dozen as a small token of my appreciation for discovering this information.)

[Seth Campbell]

Re: Manly Men Rejoice! Being fat saves your life!

Ah Brother, your phsyique is a wonder to us all. However since officer Roberts mentioned the BMI, I have to point out that according to it, our wonderful President Bush was considered Fat by that scale, yet he was also considered the "fittest president ever".

The BMI is another one of those liebral lies that is used to turn us into weak little vegetarians that Obama's hench men will be able to destroy easily. I believe it's a plot to destroy the healthy American.

Just take a look at this from Consumer Freedom. Look at what it's doing to British Children

http://www.consumerfreedom.com/news_detail.cfm/h/4221-theres-overweight-and-then-theres-overweight

And Obama's not going to be happy until they destroy the American Children as well.

[HTannor]

Re: Manly Men Rejoice! Being fat saves your life!

.... I have to point out that according to it, our wonderful President Bush was considered Fat by that scale, yet he was also considered the "fittest president ever".

Just take a look at this from Consumer Freedom. Look at what it's doing to British Children
http://www.consumerfreedom.com/news_detail.cfm/h/4221-theres-overweight-and-then-theres-overweight

Wise words, Brother Seth.

I have to confess that during the Bush administration, I paid little attention to G.B. Jr. During those wonderful years my attention was always focused upon my precious Dick. Well, sure, my Dick carried a pound or two, of course, but always stood tall when there was a call to action.

I checked out the link you included in your post, but found much of it met my expectations. Those Brit fags lived up to what I expected and their research verified my suspicions.

I still plan on meeting Brother Don tomorrow morning. To prepare myself for the meeting, this afternoon I went to the Cinnabon store here the mall in Des Moines and loaded up on rolls and cookies. I can feel myself already bulking up to face the “hazards of the road.”

Thank you, Brother Seth, for your concerns.