[Anne Sayne]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Sister Handmaiden, what a wonderful song! Especially impressed because it comes from the same tune of the band that created the most evil genre of music, rock!

[BrotherLarry]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

I Saw God Standing There (Tune of the Beatles "I Saw Her Standing There")



Well my soul was unclean
I was just like Charlie Sheen
And the way I sinned
Was way beyond compare
But I'll never sin, oh my brother
Since I saw God standing there.

Well He looked my way
And I had to pray
I confessed my sins
He took them all away
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother
oooooh
Since I saw God standing there.

Well my soul was cleaned
Yeah I felt redeemed
When I felt His hand in mine

So He cleansed me from lust
And I knew I could trust
He would keep my soul and treat me really fair
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother oooooh
Since I saw God standing there
Well since I saw God standing there
Yeah well since I saw God standing there.

[Anne Sayne]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

I Saw God Standing There (Tune of the Beatles "I Saw Her Standing There")



Well my soul was unclean
I was just like Charlie Sheen
And the way I sinned
Was way beyond compare
But I'll never sin, oh my brother
Since I saw God standing there.

Well He looked my way
And I had to pray
I confessed my sins
He took them all away
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother
oooooh
Since I saw God standing there.

Well my soul was cleaned
Yeah I felt redeemed
When I felt His hand in mine

So He cleansed me from lust
And I knew I could trust
He would keep my soul and treat me really fair
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother oooooh
Since I saw God standing there
Well since I saw God standing there
Yeah well since I saw God standing there.

Another great replacement of a godless Beatles song! We should go to the store, take all their albums off the shelves, and replace them with a collection of THESE masterpieces! Very impressed, BrotherLarry

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

My version of "Hound Dog" by Elvis Pressly

Sodomite

You ain't nothin' but a sodomite
Faggin' all the time
Well, you ain't goin' to heaven
And you ain't no friend of mine

Well you said you were normal
Well that was just a lie
Yeah you said you were a Christian
Well that was just a lie
Well you ain't gonna live much longer
and you will soon die in AIDS

You ain't nothing but a pedophile
Molestin' all the time
Well you never loved Jesus
and you ain't no friend of Him

[BrotherLarry]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Whip Her (Tune of "Whip It" - Devo)


Crack that whip
Don't let that woman slip
Catch her doing crack?
Break your woman's back

When a magpie comes along
You must whip her
Before bad habits last too long
You must whip her
When your supper tastes all wrong
You must whip her

Now whip her
Into shape
Shape it up
Set her straight
Go forward
Move ahead
You must correct it
It's not too late
To whip her
Whip her good

When your wife is talking back
You must whip her
You will never live it down
Unless you whip her
What will your buddies say
If you don't whip her?

I say whip her
Whip her good
I say whip her
Whip her good


Crack that whip
Give her face a slap
When she tells you "no"
Break her little toe

When problem women come along
You must whip them
Just like children going wrong
You must whip them
Be inspired by my song
You must whip them

Now whip her
Into shape
Shape her up
Don't wait!
Go forward
Move ahead
Let God detect it
It's not too late
To whip her
Into shape
Shape her up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead
Is she aids infected?
Then it's too late
To whip her
Whip her good.

[Titus Templeton]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Slowly but surely we have enough songs for an entire album.

My version of "Hound Dog" by Elvis Pressly

Sodomite

You ain't nothin' but a sodomite
Faggin' all the time
Well, you ain't goin' to heaven
And you ain't no friend of mine

Well you said you were normal
Well that was just a lie
Yeah you said you were a Christian
Well that was just a lie
Well you ain't gonna live much longer
and you will soon die in AIDS

You ain't nothing but a pedophile
Molestin' all the time
Well you never loved Jesus
and you ain't no friend of Him

I think we found the first song of the album.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!




Perhaps this would be an appropriate cover for our album?

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

From Michelle Jackson's "Beat It"

Beat Her

You told her that she shouldn't do it again
She burnt the pot, you had to buy a new one
So I say it to you now and my words are really clear
Just beat her, just beat her

She will run, she will do what she can
You want to see blood, be a Christian man
You better be tough, be the man in the house
So beat her, if she's been bad

Just beat her, beat her, beat her, beat her
But not until she's defeated
Showin' how good and strong is your fist
It really matters, that she knows what's right or wrong

Just beat her, beat her
Just beat her, beat her
Just beat her, beat her
Just beat her, beat her

She is on the run now, better catch her while you can
Don't want to be a faggot, you want to be a man
You want to stay Christian, better do what you should
So beat her, just beat her

[Anne Sayne]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

[ATTACH]26103[/ATTACH]


Perhaps this would be an appropriate cover for our album?

That would be a beautiful album cover! I can't wait to see if these end up in stores. You would save thousands of souls with this music

[BrotherLarry]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Where Our Souls Belong (to the tune of Joe Cocker's Up Where We Belong)


God knows what tomorrow brings
In this world few souls survive
True Christians™ know when the rapture comes
Forever, we'll be alive.
The road is long
There are sinners in our way
But we shut them down every day
Lord lift us up where we belong
Toward the King of Kings
Though we don't have wings
Lord lift us up where we belong
Far from the world below
Up where True Christians™ go


Some hang on to foolish things
Live their lives sinning all day
But we have more than here and now
No matter what the heathens say

The road is long
There are catholics in our way
But we pray against them every day


Lord lift us up where we belong
Toward the King of Kings
Though we don't have wings
Lord lift us up where we belong
Far from the world below
Up where True Christians™ go


Time goes by
No need to cry
You'll fly up high
Unless you're gay


Lord lift us up where we belong
Toward the King of Kings
Though we don't have wings
Lord lift us up where we belong
Far from the world below
Up where True Christians™ go


Lord lift us up where we belong
Toward the King of Kings
Though we don't have wings
Lord lift us up where we belong
(Fade...)

[Titus Templeton]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Ozzy Osbourne - Catholic (Dreamer)

Gazing through the window
At the Pope outside
Wondering will Jesus
make him stop
Hoping that God will
Stop him from abusing them, sometime

After all the Pope
Is the choosen one
And here all these boys
Fighting for their lives
Watching all of this
Repeat itself
Makes me sad

I'm just a catholic
A catholic in the Vatican
I'm just a catholic
Who dreams of better days

I watch them worship Mary every day
But it doesn't feel right
I'm hoping that this madness ends one day
And God brings a sign
A better catholicism for those
Who will come after us, this time

I'm just a catholic
A catholic in the Vatican, oh yeah
I'm just a Catholic
Who dreams of better days

My higher power is
God or Jesus Christ
It does really
Matter much to me
Without each others help
There ain't no hope for catholicism
I'm living in a dream
A fantasy, oh yeah yeah yeah

If only we could stop
The celibacy
It would be nice if
We could stop it now
When will all this stupid rules
and bigotry, be gone?

I'm just a catholic
A catholic in the Vatican
Today
I'm just a Catholic
Who dreams of better days
Oh yeah
I'm just a Catholic
Who's searching for
The true way, today
I'm just a catholic
Dreaming to be a True Christian™
Oh yeah yeah yeah

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Warning. This Tune Will Get Stuck in Your Head.

Do the Donald
(Victory Dance)(Sung to the tune of Do the Hustle)

Do it!

Do it!

Do it!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do it!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

Do the Donald!

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Warning. This Tune Will Get Stuck in Your Head.

Sister, you've provided a most infectious ear-worm, and I can't stop singing and dancing and praising Jesus for this Inevitable Trump Triumph!

[BrotherLarry]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Catlicks
(to the tune of the Willie Nelson song by a similar name)

Catlicks ain't easy to love, they smell kind of like mold. .
They'd rather give you some guilt than part with their gold.
Rosaries, cross buckles and habits of black,
A different saint's feast every day.
If you don't let him molest you, or play with your kids
He'll prob'ly just ride away.

Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be catlicks.
Don't let 'em wear a crucifix or go to a mass.
Make 'em be baptized and paddle their ass.
Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be catlicks.
'Cos they'll be pedophiles tricking kids with their wiles.
Spitting in Jesus' sweet face.

Catlicks like kneeling and standing and crossing themselves,
Worshipping Mary and keeping saint statues on shelves.
Them that don't worship the pope, they truly despise,
And sometimes they will fake it
He's wrong, won't admit it, his pride won't let him,
Tells lies to make you think he's right.

Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be catlicks.
Don't let 'em wear a crucifix or go to a mass.
Make 'em be baptized and paddle their ass.
Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be catlicks.
'Cos they'll be pedophiles tricking kids with their wiles.
Spitting in Jesus' sweet face.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills!

Here's a treat with an actual video taking the devil out of Lady Gaga's song, Bad Romance. Here is someone that looks like Sister Mary's sibling singing "God's Romance."


Warning: her talent is going to deeply affect you. You'll be shouting before its over.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eZ4bz4G1L0