[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

Uses the word "fabulous"
Works for the Vatican and the papist "church"
Sings in the shower
Uses body wash instead of a manly bar of soap
Wears cologne (though we're still investigating if Axe Body Spray counts)
Wears deodorant
Has any sheets on his bed that aren't white, khaki, or camouflage cotton
Text messages (what is he saying that he doesn't want people to hear?)
Doesn't own a gun

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

In my truck stop ministry, I've encountered many of these "secret" homosexuals, Sister Maria!

A few things I've learned to watch for:

Mentions that he drives a "big rig" (that's code for "is a 'top man' who has a large tallywhacker")
Wears ball cap backwards (so the brim doesn't get in the way of performing fellatio!)
Wears a ball cap frontwards (because he's a "top man")
Has a "chain drive" wallet (chain is used to bind the hands of innocent forced-sodomy victims)



Wears dirty jeans and t-shirts (covered with lubricant and other fluid stains, and grass stains from raping other men behind truck stop buildings)
Rides a Harley Davidson motorcycle in "full leather"
Calls Men of God "faggots" and tells them to "suck my d*ck" instead of praying to Jesus for Salvation
When a Man of God is on his knees praying to Jesus, says, "Hey, while you're down there . . ."

[MightyMouse]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

Sister, is there an "whining exemption" for those accursed by THE LORD?

I don't want to be a homosexual! I'll slice my neck open with a Skilsaw if I am, that's too much.

Will I go straight to Heaven if I slice my neck open with a Skilsaw before the faggotry consumes me?

Please, let me know, I'm just sick worrying about it. Skilsaw?

You silly bastard.. Skillsaws suck. You need a nice Porter*Cable Circular saw.. That'll get the bone just right...
Of course you may not get all the way through if you start from the back and go forward.. I know, I've tried. I just paralyzed myself from the eyebrows down.

This site is amazing.. I'm starting to understand why MSNBC exists. Here I was thinking being a Libitarian/conservative was a good thing, but apparently the people that the Left makes fun of DOES, in fact, exist.

[Miimii]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

More signs;

- Uses the word "darling" and "sweetie".
- Looks at men with desire.
- Doesn't have a girlfriend.
- Drives like a woman.
- Is a member of a book club.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

More signs;

- Uses the word "darling" and "sweetie".
- Looks at men with desire.
- Doesn't have a girlfriend.
- Drives like a woman.
- Is a member of a book club.

. . . especially the Oprah Book Club.

[NoFriendofGod]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

Is a liberal arts major in college

Okay, hold on. I'm a music education major because I really believe that God speaks to me through music, so I want to help students realize that God speaks in other ways to people. So how does that make me gay?
Also, having red hair? Conan O'Brian isnt' gay...

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

Okay, hold on. I'm a music education major because I really believe that God speaks to me through music, so I want to help students realize that God speaks in other ways to people. So how does that make me gay?
Also, having red hair? Conan O'Brian isnt' gay...

Sure. And neither is Carrot Top.

[NoFriendofGod]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

Sure. And neither is Carrot Top.

He is?
My goodness, that explains a lot.
But still. I know a lot of redheads who are straight, so I fail to see how that makes any sense. As for the men wearing wedding rings, isn't it kind of ironic since that ring is proof that they're married to women? Some of these observations seem a bit iffy in my humble opinion, but then again, what do I know, I'm just a music major. :/

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

• Has prostate, testicle or colon cancer. The only way you can get cancer is threw gay sex.
• Lives with his parents past age eighteen. Momma's boy.
• Never served in the military. All draft dodgers are gay (exception: when to collage to get his buisness career started)
• Owns a weed wacker (that's what Mexican gardener's are for)
• Likes to paint. Art homo with sketch books full of drawings of other men's bottoms. Enough said.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

As for the men wearing wedding rings, isn't it kind of ironic since that ring is proof that they're married to women?

A real man doesn't have to prove anything.

[NoFriendofGod]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

A real man doesn't have to prove anything.

So should a man be able to just walk about having women (or men in my case) think that he's single when he's really not? I mean no disrespect, but that sounds rather dishonest.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

So should a man be able to just walk about having women (or men in my case) think that he's single when he's really not? I mean no disrespect, but that sounds rather dishonest.

Well, if you are a flaming sodomite than of course the most innocent of things would sound dishonest.
Men didn't start wearing wedding rings until well within the last century, by no coincidence when men in this society start getting feminized and homos*xualized!
It's irrelevant what other people think! Harlots shouldn't be throwing themselves at men anyway, married or not! A good, Godly, decent man would just rebuff any such advances anyway, and if he's married he would say so. A man's word should be his bond, he doesn't need any jewelry to do the talking for him.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

More to add the the gaydar

• Multilateralist, real men do it alone and like God don't need partners.
• Can live with a mosque in their town. gay AND secret Muslim.
• Has to take a drug test. Gays abuse drugs, so if their boss suspects them of drug abuse, they are gay.
• Needs health insurance Gays get AIDs all the time.

[NoFriendofGod]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

Gays get AIDs all the time.

You do realize that a higher percentage of the heterosexual population has HIV/AIDS than the homosexual population right? I mean, really. Gay men and women make up about 10% of the population of the United States, so odds are there are going to be a lot more straight people with said disease than gays.

[incapableofthought]

Re: How to Recognize a Homosexual

I have worked with gays for many years and have found these signs to be a sure thing in determining a homosexual

- carries a wallet
- wears a belt
-drives on the right side of the road
- uses words like "yes" and "ok" (so gay)
-believes in that america is the greatest country ever (cough economy cough)