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  • Levi Jones
    Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
    Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
    Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
     
    • Jul 2009
    • 13930

    #1

    Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

    In this latest attempt by Satan to turn normal people gay, Oreo (Nabisco division of Kraft Foods) has released a show of solidarity with the queer acceptance movement.




    I am calling on all Christians to join with Landover Baptist church as we boycott the fag lifestyle of soul damning, nation-destroying filth company Kraft.

    Ephesians 5:11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.

    Here is a list of all the foods that Kraft puts out that I don't want to see in any Christian household.

    • Africana (Romania)
    • Air Crisps
    • Ali Coffee
    • Alpen Gold (chocolate) (Hungary, Russia)
    • Arrowroot biscuits
    • Back to Nature
    • Bagel-Fuls
    • Baker's (chocolate)
    • Balance Bar
    • Bassetts Allsorts (sweets) (United Kingdom)
    • Better Cheddars
    • Boca Burger
    • Bonox
    • Breakstone's
    • BullsEye Barbecue Sauce
    • Cadbury plc
    • Café HAG
    • California Pizza Kitchen (grocery store items)
    • Calumet Baking Powder
    • Cameo (biscuits)
    • Capri Sun (juice drink)
    • Carte Noire
    • Cheesybite
    • Charada (Peru)
    • Cheese Nips
    • Cheez Whiz
    • Cheezels (Malaysia)
    • Chicken in a Biskit
    • Chips Ahoy! (cookies)
    • Chipsmore (Malaysia, Singapore)
    • Christie (Canadian division of Nabisco)
    • Claussen (pickles)
    • Clight
    • Club Social (crackers)
    • Cool Whip (non-dairy whipped cream)
    • CornNuts (snack food)
    • Coronita (Peru)
    • Côte d'Or
    • Country Time (powdered drink mix)
    • Cracker Barrel
    • Crystal Light
    • Daim (Sweden)
    • Dairylea (Europe)
    • Delissio (Canada)
    • Easy Cheese
    • Eden processed cheese (Philippines)
    • El Caserío (Spain)
    • Estrella (Sweden)
    • Field (Peru)
    • Fig Newton
    • Figaro (Chocolate) (Slovakia)
    • Filipinos (snack food) (Spain, Portugal)
    • Freia (Norway)
    • Fudgee-O (Canada)
    • General Foods International
    • Gevalia (Sweden)
    • Grape-Nuts (breakfast cereal)
    • Green & Blacks (chocolate) (United Kingdom)
    • Grey Poupon (mustard)
    • Handi-Snacks
    • Halls (medicated sweets) (United Kingdom)
    • Harvest Crisps
    • Honey Maid
    • Hospitals
    • In-A-Biskit (Australia)
    • Jack's Pizza
    • Jacobs (Europe)
    • Jacob's (biscuits)
    • Japp (Scandinavia)
    • Jell-O (gelatin dessert)
    • Jet-Puffed Marshmallows
    • Jiagai (China)
    • Kenco (United Kingdom)
    • Knox (gelatin)
    • Kong Haakon (Norway)
    • Kool-Aid (flavored drink mix)
    • Korona (Ukraine)
    • Kraft BBQ Sauce
    • Kraft Caramels
    • Kraft Macaroni and Cheese
    • Kraft Dinner (Canada)
    • Kraft Easymac
    • Kraft Mayo
    • Kraft Bagelfuls
    • Kraft Peanut Butter (Canada)
    • Kraft Singles (pasteurized prepared cheese product)
    • Kraft Sandwich Spread
    • Kraker Bran
    • Lacta (Brazil, Greece)
    • Lefèvre-Utile
    • Lucky crackers (Taiwan)
    • Lunchables
    • Lyuks (potato chips) (Ukraine)
    • Maarud (potato chips) (Norway)
    • Marabou (Sweden)
    • Maxwell House (coffee)
    • Maynards Wine Gums (sweets) (United Kingdom)
    • Mellow Bird's Coffee (United Kingdom)
    • Milka (Europe)
    • Miracle Whip (salad dressing spread)
    • Miracoli (Germany)
    • Mostro (Peru)
    • Mikado (United Kingdom)
    • Nabisco
    • Nabob (coffee) (Canada)
    • Natural Confectionery Company ('natural' sweets) (Australia & United Kingdom)
    • Nilla
    • Non-Stop (Scandinavia)
    • Nutter Butter
    • O'boy (Scandinavia, Estonia)
    • O'smile (Taiwan)
    • Onko (coffee)
    • Oreo (cookie)
    • Orchard Crisps
    • ORO Saiwa
    • Oscar Mayer
    • Grated Parmesan cheese
    • Pacific crackers (China)
    • Philadelphia cream cheese
    • Pigrolac
    • Planters
    • Poiana (Romania)
    • Polly-O (cheese)
    • Premium (a Nabisco brand of saltine crackers)
    • Pretzels
    • P'tit Québec
    • Prince Polo
    • Pure Kraft Salad Dressings
    • Ritz
    • Ritz Metro
    • Royal baking powder
    • Saiwa (Italian Division of Nabisco)
    • Seven Seas (salad dressings)
    • Saimaza (Spain)
    • Sanka (decaffeinated coffee)
    • Shake 'n Bake
    • Simmenthal (canned meat)
    • Snackabouts
    • SnackWells
    • South Beach Living
    • Starbucks (grocery store items)
    • Stove Top stuffing
    • Suchard
    • Svoge (Bulgaria)
    • Swiss Crackers
    • Sugar Wafers
    • Taco Bell (grocery store items)
    • Tang
    • Tassimo (single-serve coffee machines using pods branded as T-Discs)
    • Teddy Grahams
    • Terrabusi (Kraft Foods Argentina)
    • Terry's (chocolates)
    • Terry's Chocolate Orange
    • Tiger Energy Biscuits (Southeast Asian countries)
    • Toasted Chips
    • Toblerone (Kraft Foods Switzerland)
    • Tombstone (frozen pizza)
    • Triscuit (snack cracker)
    • Thinsations
    • Trakinas
    • Trebor (sweets) (United Kingdom)
    • Twist
    • Twisties (Malaysia)
    • Uguan (China)
    • Vegemite (Australia)
    • Velveeta
    • Wheat Thins
    We'll be on the lookout for these items at the church and church related functions. I would sure hate to kick you out of the picnic because you couldn't adhere to a simple boycott list.

    In Christ,
    Levi Jones
    Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.
  • Cranky Old Man
    Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
    You kids get off his lawn!
     
    • Jan 2010
    • 22348

    #2
    Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

    Let's hope these are poisoned and kill a lot of gays. Then at least they would have done something right.

    Leviticus 20:13 "If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them."
    5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
    To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
    James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

    Comment

    • Rev. M. Rodimer
      Honorary True Christian™
      Forum Member
      • May 2008
      • 13996

      #3
      Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

      The vile hatefulness of atheists and homosexuals is demonstrated here:

      Bible boring? Nonsense!
      Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
      You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

      Comment

      • Bob4God
        Moderator
        Arms Dealer for CHRIST
        Hands folded for Jesus
         
        • Apr 2008
        • 5274

        #4
        Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

        Can you imagine how these cookies would make your feces look?

        My stomach turns at the thought of the gays running half naked down the street, with their faces and chests smeared with their own rainbow feces.

        LORD HELP US.
        sigpic
        The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
        - Proverbs 15:3

        CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


        CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78551

          #5
          Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

          Originally posted by Bob4God View Post
          Can you imagine how these cookies would make your feces look?

          My stomach turns at the thought of the gays running half naked down the street, with their faces and chests smeared with their own rainbow feces.

          LORD HELP US.
          The queers and homers are obsessed with feces. They eat special foods to enhance the effects. They even sing songs about it!

          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • Pastor Ed Lowman
            Southern Hospitality Exemplified
            Always kind and loving
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2011
            • 1838

            #6
            Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

            It is times like these when I find the need to ask God for more wisdom. God knew when he first drew a rainbow in the sky with His divine finger (Genesis 9:12-17) that His precious symbol would be misused in this way, and yet he went right on and made it anyway. I wish God hadn't done that. Pray for me, brethren.

            Comment

            • Dr Laurence Niles
              Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
               
              • Jan 2012
              • 9062

              #7
              Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

              I have long thought that this so called treats only exist to lure young, firm thighed, young men into gaiety.

              Just look at one head on and what does that make you think of?

              That's right: an anal spigot! And what is worse I understand that one is supposed to open it up and lick out the creme

              As a subliminal teaching method to encourage filching it is beyond compare! And to make things worse this so called subliminal message is buried so deep that most people without a Ph.D is psychology would be unable to detect it.

              Such is the depth of depravity of the anal enabling athiestics agenda it's nothing more than a poorly disguised avert for the so called 'coffee creme' parties held in such high regard by the gaywise.

              YIC
              1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

              Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

              Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

              Comment

              • Nikolai the russian
                Unsaved trash, suspected communist
                • Jun 2012
                • 5

                #8
                Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

                ''One that hates is also a murderer''

                Jesus has taught me many things. Hate does not exist, but love does.

                I do not hate these people. I pity them and pray that they find their path.

                I also pray that humanity as a whole finds love for each other and themselves.

                Amen.

                Nikolai the russian.
                Revelations 21:6
                And He said to me, “It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. I will give of the fountain of the water of life freely to him who thirsts.

                Comment

                • Redeemed Papist
                  Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light(c)
                  True Christian™
                  • Jul 2011
                  • 10409

                  #9
                  Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

                  Originally posted by Nikolai the russian View Post
                  ''One that hates is also a murderer''

                  Jesus has taught me many things. Hate does not exist, but love does.

                  I do not hate these people. I pity them and pray that they find their path.

                  I also pray that humanity as a whole finds love for each other and themselves.

                  Amen.

                  Nikolai the russian.
                  That's nice.

                  But here in the real world where we deal with God as He actually is we acknowledge that certain types of behaviour are an abomination.

                  I assume you are with us on the whole fornicating with animals thing...

                  Bible Search Search took 0.02 seconds.

                  Your search - One that hates is also a murderer - did not match any documents.
                  No pages were found containing "One that hates is also a murderer".
                  sigpic
                  Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

                  John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

                  Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
                  The truth about volcanos
                  Sex and debauchery in public schools
                  Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
                  God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
                  Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

                  Comment

                  • Rev. M. Rodimer
                    Honorary True Christian™
                    Forum Member
                    • May 2008
                    • 13996

                    #10
                    Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

                    Originally posted by Nikolai the russian View Post
                    Jesus has taught me many things. Hate does not exist, but love does.
                    Could you back this up with Scripture? Thanks!
                    Bible boring? Nonsense!
                    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                    Comment

                    • Zechariah Smyth
                      Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
                      True Christian™
                      • Feb 2011
                      • 15251

                      #11
                      Re: Oreos come out of the closet as cookies for queers.

                      I haven't eaten those things since they replaced the lard with vegetable oil.

                      sigpic

                      Comment

                      • Nobar King
                        Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
                        Christ's Guardian
                        True Christian™
                        • Sep 2007
                        • 23748

                        #12
                        Oreo Jail Slang

                        I didn't want to mention this sooner, but I'm pretty sure OREO is jail slang for when you get raped by two nigras at the same time.
                        May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                        Comment

                        • Rev. M. Rodimer
                          Honorary True Christian™
                          Forum Member
                          • May 2008
                          • 13996

                          #13
                          Re: Oreo Jail Slang

                          Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
                          I didn't want to mention this sooner, but I'm pretty sure OREO is jail slang for when you get raped by two nigras at the same time.
                          I thought that was called a "spit roast".
                          Bible boring? Nonsense!
                          Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                          You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                          Comment

                          • Pastor Ed Lowman
                            Southern Hospitality Exemplified
                            Always kind and loving
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2011
                            • 1838

                            #14
                            Re: Oreo Jail Slang

                            Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                            I thought that was called a "spit roast".
                            I thought it was a slang term for when the two big bucks "do the deed" and you are left swaying from the dizziness of the bludgeoning and you get bent over and rimmed before the final beat-down begins.

                            Pastor Ed

                            Comment

                            • Rev. M. Rodimer
                              Honorary True Christian™
                              Forum Member
                              • May 2008
                              • 13996

                              #15
                              Re: Oreo Jail Slang

                              Originally posted by Pastor Ed Lowman View Post
                              I thought it was a slang term for when the two big bucks "do the deed" and you are left swaying from the dizziness of the bludgeoning and you get bent over and rimmed before the final beat-down begins.

                              Pastor Ed
                              This is all so confusing.

                              Does anyone know where we can find a Negro homosexual to explain all this to us?

                              Where's Alfred King, anyway?
                              Bible boring? Nonsense!
                              Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                              You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                              Comment

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