How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

[SmiteTheAthiests]

I have become intensely worried that my hairdresser may be a homosexual. I am not sure how to identify them, but when he was cutting my hair I casually said something along the lines of "All homosexuals, negroids and atheists should be crucified" (Nothing racist or offensive in any way). My hairdresser just looked at me like and continued cutting my hair. Here's the kicker. He didn't even say anything and I'm pretty sure he gave me a bad haircut. How do I identify him as a homosexual so I can protest outside of his house?

[Nobar King]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

Is this a list thread? I love list threads!!!

Let me start:

1. Tight leg pants
2. Brush forward Justin Beiber haircut
3. Emo kids who wear two or more belts
4. Men with long hair
5. Men who wear pink
6. Men who wear cardigans with loafers (and tight pants)
7. Any man who colors his hair
8. Men who cross their legs when they sit
9. Likes emo bands like Green Day or Bullet for my Valentine
10. Orders calimari for an appetizer
11. Uses Axe body spray because he likes it, not to cover up the stench of weed
12. Likes Bikram yoga
13. Wears eyeliner or any other type of makeup
14. Shaves his chest
15. Soccer, competitive cycling, synchronized swimming: all gay
16. Drives a Dodge Caliber
17. Uses shea butter to keep his hands soft and supple
18. Purple shirts or ties

Is that enough?

[Alterboy]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

Is this a list thread? I love list threads!!!

Let me start:

1. Tight leg pants
2. Brush forward Justin Beiber haircut
3. Emo kids who wear two or more belts
4. Men with long hair
5. Men who wear pink
6. Men who wear cardigans with loafers (and tight pants)
7. Any man who colors his hair
8. Men who cross their legs when they sit
9. Likes emo bands like Green Day or Bullet for my Valentine
10. Orders calimari for an appetizer
11. Uses Axe body spray because he likes it, not to cover up the stench of weed
12. Likes Bikram yoga
13. Wears eyeliner or any other type of makeup
14. Shaves his chest
15. Soccer, competitive cycling, synchronized swimming: all gay
16. Drives a Dodge Caliber
17. Uses shea butter to keep his hands soft and supple
18. Purple shirts or ties

Is that enough?

Thank you for this Brother Nobar.
My one brother is guilty of several of these crimes...
But thankfully he is married to a woman like God intended.
So I shall keep my eye on him and stone him if necessary.

[James Hutchins]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

Sadly, I have discovered that I am apparently very attractive to the Homersexualizing male. Perhaps it it is my soft eyes, glowing with the Love of Jesus(r), my incredible manly 6'7", 275#, 3% body fat sculpted physique, my light step upon Gods Fertile Earth or my voice that is full of penitence.

I'll be riding my Harley and stop at a rest stop to stretch my legs and fagboys come crawling out of the bushes. That all seem the think I wear chaps and a vest as some sort of 'come hither' thing when all I am doing is communicating to Jesus by allowing Him unfettered access.
Being in the saddle for hours on end often results in a numbness and a tingling in my lower extremities and I often am unable to detect the intrusion of one of these HomoQueers. All I can say is Praise Jesus for the diligent eyes of the State Troopers saving me from culminated rape and shame. I am a married True Christian™ after all!

As a side note, anyone in the Ohio area of Rt.80 willing to write a letter to the West Middlesex court, I'd appreciate it.

[Sammy The Penitent]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

I have become intensely worried that my hairdresser may be a homosexual. I am not sure how to identify them, but when he was cutting my hair I casually said something along the lines of "All homosexuals, negroids and atheists should be crucified" (Nothing racist or offensive in any way). My hairdresser just looked at me like and continued cutting my hair. Here's the kicker. He didn't even say anything and I'm pretty sure he gave me a bad haircut. How do I identify him as a homosexual so I can protest outside of his house?

It's safest to assume that all male hairdressers are homos.

YIC

[lukasekman]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

Well, here are a few more:

• Spend lots of money on home styling.
• Uses iPhone and Mac.
• Likes "women" with short hair.
• Obsessed by Jap culture.
• Doesn't stockpile food and supplies.
• Uses any skincare but motor oil.
• Wears make-up, but think it's cruel to test it on animals.
• No driving license.
• No gun.
• Left-handed.
• Makes embarrassing remarks on other's homes.
• Vegetarian.
• Have a trouble with people chomping.
• Stretches his anus.

[SmiteTheAthiests]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

Today I went to the hairdressers to investigate. I had my hair cut several different times, a quarter inch shorter each time to investigate. It seemed like the hairdresser had a bunch of signs. The hairdresser even got mad the fourth time I asked for another haircut. That's when I laid it on (him). I said "Beware foul homosexual, a man like yourself will go to hell if you do not repent." It turns out that the hairdresser was a female cancer patient. When I was told this I exclaimed that she should grow out her hair instead of a devilish manly shaved head. The other customers for some reason told me to leave when she started crying. I knew that this woman was possessed by a lesbian demon. I grabbed one of my seven bibles that I carry around in my totally straight man purse. I threw it at the demon. It was foaming at the eyes in rage and letting out a bestial wail. I believe it was preparing for attack. I grabbed another bible and screamed "The power of Christ compels you." multiple times. An obviously homosexual man that pulled into the lot in a Prius told me to leave. I left and prayed for the woman after I threw a bible through his windshield.
So today was a pretty average day of community service.

[Godfly]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

If a man owns a small dog he is almost certainly a homer.

[Alexandria Puckett]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

If a man owns a small dog he is almost certainly a homer.

What if his wife owns a small dog? I happen to have one, should I get rid of her?

[Cathy B.]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

Children can be taught to not develop those homosexual habits they might have picked up from some spiritual infection. At our school, we make sure boys run like boys, throw and catch like boys, and never ever cry because that's a feminine thing. Girls are required to wear dresses and skirts only, and never allowed to play on the playground equipment because that would only encourage boys to look up their skirts when on the monkey bars or when running fast. The girls learn from a very early age that their bodies will always inspire a spiritual battle in boys because of man's sin nature and lust. They know that to lead a boy to lust is to lead him to Hell, and they learn from an early age not to do that because that's just mean and rotten to do to a boy.

[SmiteTheAthiests]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

In my house we had a rule that any boy that cried over anything would be hit with the metal part of the belt instead of the leather part. I haven't cried since I was 8 and my dog died.

[zdevoll]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

As a redeemed HomoFag,
I can shed some light on other tel-tale signs:
Love for Justin Bieber (The biggest Fag) or One Direction (Fag Orgy)
Constantly "adjusting themselves" when with other men
swaying hips while walking
lip biting

These are just a few

[Jacobispukesome]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

The reason he looked like was because of what you said. It was both racist and disguisting.

[SmiteTheAthiests]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

The reason he looked like was because of what you said. It was both racist and disguisting.

Why don't you read my other post. It has a follow up. I don't think anything I said was racist or disgusting. I am looking and I don't see anything offensive in my post.
You must be one of those satanic atheist minions trying to infiltrate the LBC.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: How To Identify A Suspected Homosexual?

The reason he looked like was because of what you said. It was both racist and disguisting.

Please could you help us understand the moral compass you used while making this judgement?

Chapter and verse, thank you!