Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

[slimjim951]

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

... Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant....

Well yes, that part is quite amusing. The rest, I'm afraid, is pretty much incomprehensible. Would you care to break down your undoubtedly powerful argument into a better punctuated form?


In the meantime, welcome to the introduction forum, where you introduce yourself. What church do you go to? What is your favorite Bible verse (KJV, 1611 please) and how did you come to find Jesus?

[Brother Gonzalez]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

Why are you being so Christianphobic?


We are here to express our love for God. Even when we say that we have to stone people to death, that is because we love God, and do what he says.


Could you be more specific on which parts of the Bible we do not understand?


For example, when Jesus called a Canaan woman a dog, was he being kind to her?


Matthew 15:21-28

21 Then Jesus went thence, and departed into the coasts of Tyre and Sidon.
22 And, behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, saying, Have mercy on me, O Lord, thou son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil.
23 But he answered her not a word. And his disciples came and besought him, saying, Send her away; for she crieth after us.
24 But he answered and said, I am not sent but unto the lost sheep of the house of Israel.
25 Then came she and worshipped him, saying, Lord, help me.
26 But he answered and said, It is not meet to take the children's bread, and to cast it to dogs.
27 And she said, Truth, Lord: yet the dogs eat of the crumbs which fall from their masters' table.
28 Then Jesus answered and said unto her, O woman, great is thy faith: be it unto thee even as thou wilt. And her daughter was made whole from that very hour.

[Didymus Much]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

Nice blanket accusation. Care to provide specifics IN THE APPROPRIATE THREADS that you'll find using the handy-dandy "Search" function they've thoughtfully provided?

For now, how about "Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus."? If the True Christians™ don't know what they're dealing with, how are they supposed to help you toward truly understanding the Bible?

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

Please share where you think a True Christian(tm) has misquoted or misapplied the Holy Bible, and your argument for the contrary. Please be specific.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament

Your insults are surprisingly unconvincing. Your cognitive dissonance is interesting though. Falsely claiming we ignore parts of God's Holy Bible while you yourself are clearly ignoring James 2:10, John 15:6 and 2 Corinthians 6:14–17.

Let me guess, you intend to vote for Hillary Clinton?

[Basilissa]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

Hi sweetie and to our friendly forum!

I find it very interesting that you are accusing us of not following the entire Bible 100%. (Most visitors accuse us of the opposite, of following the Bible too much).

Please, feel free to support your opinion with direct quotes from the Holy Bible. Which messages of the Holy Bible are you accusing us of not following? I mean, we are OK with gender inequalities, social inequalities, racial inequalities, genocide, so which of the messages if the Bible are we missing, exactly?

Also - please introduce yourself. That is expected of a person posting a thread in the Introduction forum, you know.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

Pride goeth before a fall., friend.

Proverbs 16:5
Every one that is proud in heart is an abomination to the Lord: though hand join in hand, he shall not be unpunished.

Proverbs 10:17
He is in the way of life that keepeth instruction: but he that refuseth reproof erreth.

Finally, proof the Bible speaks in simple terms even the feeble minded can understand (please feel free to ask if you need help):
1 Corinthians 8:2
And if any man think that he knoweth any thing, he knoweth nothing yet as he ought to know.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

Hello Jim, your post was very hurtful. I am praying for you.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

... shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

So tell us what those messages are and how you know what they are. It's easy to make unsupported assertions.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

I imagine it would be very painful. Funny that I pride myself on being tolerant but reading these forums makes me think that a flood should come, the literal scourge of the figurative messiah you ignorant redneck hillbillies all believe all pretend to worship, while blatantly being ignorant to 90% of the New Testament and too stupid to understand more than 15% of the Old Testament. I'm sure you all understand that dudes banging dudes is bad and that God expects men to knock their wives around if they get out of pocket or refuse to put out when the husband wants some but shit you guys really are ignorant to the messages of the book you purport to live by.

Mr. Jim:

8 ¶ And God spake vnto Noah, and to his sonnes with him, saying;
9 And I, behold, I establish my couenant with you, and with your seede after you:
10 And with euery liuing creature that is with you, of the fowle, of the cattell, and of euery beast of the earth with you, from all that goe out of the Arke, to euery beast of the earth.
11 And I wil establish my couenant with you, neither shal all flesh be cut off any more, by the waters of a flood, neither shall there any more be a flood to destroy the earth.
12 And God said, This is the token of the Couenant which I make betweene mee and you, and euery liuing creature that is with you, for perpetuall generations.
13 I doe set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a couenant, betweene me and the earth. (Genesis 9:8-13)


There will not be another flood, for the LORD GOD said He would not do so. He always keeps his promises (Deuteronomy 7:9).



Considering that the majority of those who post here have read the Holy Bible (KJV 1611) time and again, your statement about ignorance falls short. We always begin with Genesis and read straight through to Revelation and then start over once we've finished. Every "begat" and "whosoever" is special to a True Christian(TM).



I praise GOD that you understand being a queer is wrong, but you say it almost like that's a bad thing to know. Perhaps your nether regions were invaded by those who fly the flag of flagrant faggotry, its rainbow colors blinding you as you succumbed to their lustful lasciviousness. Please share that story with us in detail so we might minister to you appropriately.



No matter how far you have fallen into sin, our beautiful Savior is willing to lift you up and embrace you. He will forgive you (1 John 1:9). I pray that the foul spirits that enticed you to post this hurtful missive will be cast into the pits of HELL from which they came and that you will find a new life in Christ Jesus, friend. He led you here, now follow His direction and fall on your knees. I'll be there with you.



COME, LORD JESUS! (Rev. 22:12)
BrotherLarry

[Audrey MacMillan]

Re: Is it hard being too stupid to pull your heads out of your asses?

Why do you have to use so much profanity? :\