Seriously?

[_______]

Dead serious.

How stupid are you guys? Like, do you EVER fact check? I've been checking in on this forum for a couple months, everyday it gets dumber and dumber. Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire. Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated. Please tell me you guys have some form of common sense. PLEASE, for the love of your fucking God, tell this is all sarcasm.
Jesus Christ.
I just want a clear answer.
Do you guys REALLY believe everything you say? Do you THINK before you speak? If so, you people are the reason lots of people see Christians as dramatic, You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Seriously?

Dead serious.

How stupid are you guys? Like, do you EVER fact check? I've been checking in on this forum for a couple months, everyday it gets dumber and dumber. Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire. Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated. Please tell me you guys have some form of common sense. PLEASE, for the love of your piffleing God, tell this is all sarcasm.
Jesus Christ.
I just want a clear answer.
Do you guys REALLY believe everything you say? Do you THINK before you speak? If so, you people are the reason lots of people see Christians as dramatic, You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

What you need to do is read The Bible. Are you telling us that the Creator of the universe doesn't know how He created it? Doesn't know what happens in it? Gave us false warnings about false consequences when exactly what He warned about is happening all around us?

https://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/Genesis-2-4_4-7/

https://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/Joshua-1-9/

[BibleReader2231]

Re: Seriously?

What has been said on these forums that’s so awful? The good people who attend Landover Baptist Church in Freehold Iowa are some of the godliest people I know. They follow the word of the KJV Bible. Nothing they say or do is contradictory to what they believe in. These forums are an extra place for them to communicate and preach in hopes of converting the unsaved into soldiers for Jesus and women to serve those soldiers. Nothing that’s said or done here is illegal either. Take your uppity atheist butt off the chair and read your Bible before you start making accusations around here you ignorant buffoon.

[Isabella White]

Re: Seriously?

Dead serious.
How stupid are you guys? Like, do you EVER fact check? I've been checking in on this forum for a couple months, everyday it gets dumber and dumber. Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire. Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated. Please tell me you guys have some form of common sense. PLEASE, for the love of your piffleing God, tell this is all sarcasm.
Jesus Christ.
I just want a clear answer.
Do you guys REALLY believe everything you say? Do you THINK before you speak? If so, you people are the reason lots of people see Christians as dramatic, You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

Young lady, you have every right to ask questions, and we, the believers at , are in the position to answer SERIOUS questions. But if you have come on this Godly site to mock the followers of the , then you will find that that places you in the crosshairs of the wrath of Almighty:

I Chronicles 16:22 "Touch not mine anointed, and do my prophets no harm."

However, we do understand that you are angry and confused. You are in the right place to find the answers to your questions. We are here to testify to the wondrous Salvation through the shed of the Lamb, as outlined in the . Might I invite you to open your own copy of the , and to study with us, and to give your heart and soul to the , as you ask to forgive you and to cleanse you from your wretched, horrible, despicable, disgusting, appalling, shocking, scandalous, abhorrent, shameful sins, and to become washed in the cleansing that so graciously spilled for us on the cross at Calvary?

Once you do that, you will see how wrong you have been. And, you will rejoice with us, the believers at , in your eternal salvation and redemption as you learn, among other things, that has not only redeemed you from spending eternity in (where you rightfully belong), but, rather, He has provided you with a free, no-mortgage mansion in Heaven, behind secure gates of pearl, on gold-paved streets:

John 14:2 "In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you."

Revelation 21:21 " And the twelve gates were twelve pearls: every several gate was of one pearl: and the street of the city was pure gold, as it were transparent glass."

But, if you should choose to continue your life of sinful abominations, the only glimpse of Heaven that you will see is when you stand before the Almighty on Judgment Day, when you will, undoubtedly and very deservedly, hear these words: "GO TO !!"

Revelation 21:8 "But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death."

I shall pray for your soul, young lady. Eternity is forever. is unbearably hot. The is cleansing. The choice is yours.

Sincerely,
Isabella W.

[Basilissa]

Re: Seriously?

Yes, we are serious, as serious as is God when He says He plans to scorch billions of people on Judgment Day.

Repent for your sins now or accept the consequences!

[Vengeance Puriel]

Re: Seriously?

Dead serious.

How stupid are you guys? Like, do you EVER fact check? I've been checking in on this forum for a couple of months, every day it gets dumber and dumber. Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire. Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated. Please tell me you guys have some form of common sense. PLEASE, for the love of your piffling God, tell this is all sarcasm.
Jesus Christ.
I just want a clear answer.
Do you guys REALLY believe everything you say? Do you THINK before you speak? If so, you people are the reason lots of people see Christians as dramatic, You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

yes we all do, just as commanded.Matthew 5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

[Dennis Lukes]

Re: Seriously?

How stupid are you guys?

Not very, Miss Blank. True Christians™ are, on average, more intelligent than others. Unlike bigoted atheists, who only allow the most intelligent into their universities and laboratories, we True Christians™ will accept anyone who accepts Christ (Romans 10:13), and is above the level of mental (and spiritual) retardation.

Like, do you EVER fact check?

We most certainly do. The KJV 1611 Holy Bible is cited frequently on this forum. The Word of God is the highest factual authority in the universe (2 Timothy 3:16-17). This isn't the Clinton News Network (Titus 1:14). You'll find no fake news here, save when we expose and debunk it.

I've been checking in on this forum for a couple months, everyday it gets dumber and dumber.

Well, I'm sorry you feel that way. Everything we say is in accordance with the teachings and commandments of Jesus Christ Almighty. With that in mind, you should refrain from insulting Him in the future, or He'll make you regret it (Galatians 6:7).

Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire.

It isn't.

Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated.

Our leader Pastor Ezekiel Flint is a modern day renaissance man and an honest to God genius. The smartest man on earth is a Christian. God Himself knows literally everything (Psalms 147:5, 1 John 3:20).

You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

That's their loss. More room in Heaven for us.

[Dolores de Barriga]

Re: Seriously?

You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

Hello Miss or Mr. Underline (?). I am somewhat amused by your comment. You see, what usually makes people atheists is not the behavior of Christians, but rather the contents of the Bible itself. You know - the Holy Book which was either written by cruel and hateful men, or dictated to men by a cruel and hateful deity. Nothing that Christians say or do can change that simple fact.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Seriously?

Dead serious.

How stupid are you guys? Like, do you EVER fact check? I've been checking in on this forum for a couple months, everyday it gets dumber and dumber. Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire. Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated. Please tell me you guys have some form of common sense. PLEASE, for the love of your piffleing God, tell this is all sarcasm.
Jesus Christ.
I just want a clear answer.
Do you guys REALLY believe everything you say? Do you THINK before you speak? If so, you people are the reason lots of people see Christians as dramatic, You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

Friend, we are as deadly serious as the fires of Hell. As real as the searing brimstone burning the hair of your nostrils. As painful as fishhooks jammed in your eyes cast from the Golden Chariot(r) of God Himself.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Seriously?

Heathens will mock and jeer but never seem to comprehend. Exactly how dreadful are the consequences of their folly? Hell is the worst outcome imaginable, worse than we can imagine, and yet they draw funny pictures and tell silly stories about escapades on broomsticks with ghosts and magic stars. Satan encourages that for a reason.

I Thessalonians 5:22 Abstain from all appearance of evil.

Satan wants everyone to suffer torment as he himself is tormented. Even if he is the chief torturer, The Bible explains that he will be tormented too. There is a lake of fire prepared for him where all unbelievers will join him, suffering forever. Over and over again.

Choose Jesus today.

[Scoutman03]

Re: Seriously?

Not very, Miss Blank. True Christians™ are, on average, more intelligent than others. Unlike bigoted atheists, who only allow the most intelligent into their universities and laboratories, we True Christians™ will accept anyone who accepts Christ (Romans 10:13), and is above the level of mental (and spiritual) retardation.

Wait? More Intelligent than others?
Yall believe the Earth is flat and that Vaccines cause Autism. I bet most of you guys couldn't do algebra!

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Seriously?

I think you're getting confused with geometry.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Seriously?

Wait? More Intelligent than others?
Yall believe the Earth is flat and that Vaccines cause Autism. I bet most of you guys couldn't do algebra!

Dear Sinner,

You are confusing "intelligence" with "knowledge of information that you accept". There must have been billions of people (and there still are some in the remotest corners of the Earth's disk) that have not heard of algebra, quantum mechanics, Riemann's theorem or the hypothesis of eternal inflation. Are they less intelligent because they don't know the things that you supposedly know? Intelligence is a complex issue that can be assessed by the capability to innovate and function within the framework of a particular culture, time point and personal circumstances. Basically, Newton did not know anything about vaccines. Does that make him less intelligent than you.

The framework where the intelligence of a True Christian™ is measured is the struggle to gain access into Heaven to as many sinners as possible and to remain knowledgeable about Bible and Jesus. Where do you stand with that measure of intelligence?

2 Peter 1:2
Grace and peace be multiplied unto you through the knowledge of God, and of Jesus our Lord,


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Vengeance Puriel]

Re: Seriously?

Wait? More Intelligent than others?
Yall believe the Earth is flat and that Vaccines cause Autism. I bet most of you guys couldn't do algebra!

As it's been pointed out several times. The Bible, Gods Holy Word has told everyone the earth is flat, and yet you sinners still don't understand. The Bible has no mistakes or misdirections it's absolute and full of the truth.

[BigTimmyBloodSucker]

Re: Seriously?

Dead serious.

How stupid are you guys? Like, do you EVER fact check? I've been checking in on this forum for a couple months, everyday it gets dumber and dumber. Guys, please tell me this whole forum is satire. Please. Tell me you guys aren't actually this stupid and uneducated. Please tell me you guys have some form of common sense. PLEASE, for the love of your piffleing God, tell this is all sarcasm.
Jesus Christ.
I just want a clear answer.
Do you guys REALLY believe everything you say? Do you THINK before you speak? If so, you people are the reason lots of people see Christians as dramatic, You are the kind of people to make people atheists.

My thoughts exactly. I’m pastafarian (wink-wink). Go read our gospel. It’s life changing. Some of these emotions too....