NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

[Hischameleon]

Hello all,

I am welcoming myself to the Christian Zone of the internet--the HOTTEST new place for teens and infants! All of my friends "stan" Jesus--we like to think of him as a ROCK STAR.


For we know the following from Scripture.


"And the Lord said, Behold, there is a place by me, and thou shaltstand upon a rock" --Exodus 34:21


Jesus has been a big part of my life ever since I first began believing what my parents told me to. I Love you, Mom, and DAD!


I attend His Holy Cum Church in Leg, Minnesota, but I am curious enough about joining the Landover Family that I might just attend TWO churches. Can't ever get enough of that LORD, right, guys?


Any ways, I am so excited to get started with the sharing of "Cool" verse and bible stories. Please contact me on AOL to discuss topics like,


*BIBLE
*HATING LIBTARD
*JESUS
*THE WITCH WHORE SHACK KNOWN AS STARBUCKS (A.K.A. LIBERAL SCUM) COFFEE


Sincerely,
Mister John Grum, L.L.C.
"HisCum"

[Isabella White]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

Hello all,

I am welcoming myself to the Christian Zone of the internet--the HOTTEST new place for teens and infants! All of my friends "stan" Jesus--we like to think of him as a ROCK STAR.

For we know the following from Scripture.

"And the Lord said, Behold, there is a place by me, and thou shaltstand upon a rock" --Exodus 34:21

Jesus has been a big part of my life ever since I first began believing what my parents told me to. I Love you, Mom, and DAD!

I attend His Holy Cum Church in Leg, Minnesota, but I am curious enough about joining the Landover Family that I might just attend TWO churches. Can't ever get enough of that LORD, right, guys?

Any ways, I am so excited to get started with the sharing of "Cool" verse and bible stories. Please contact me on AOL to discuss topics like,

*BIBLE
*HATING LIBTARD
*JESUS
*THE WITCH WHORE SHACK KNOWN AS STARBUCKS (A.K.A. LIBERAL SCUM) COFFEE

Sincerely,
Mister John Grum, L.L.C.
"HisCum"

Dear Mr. Grum: To you, I am pleased to extend a warm We are pleased to have you with us, here at . It's not overly often that we have someone of your young age joining us; especially, someone who has such an appreciation for matters pertaining to geology and astronomy.

It is my prayer that you will seek the with all of your heart, as we study the wondrous Gospel as shown within the blessed pages of the . Certainly, you will find no better company for doing so than in your association with the beloved, servants of Almighty . You will notice that we are most pleased to help you to find the Truths that you need, to avoid the eternal penalty of the fires of , which you most assuredly deserve as the price for your horrible sins. May the loving bless you as He guides you here, at .

[Basilissa]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

I attend His Holy Cum Church in Leg, Minnesota, but I am curious enough about joining the Landover Family that I might just attend TWO churches. Can't ever get enough of that LORD, right, guys?

Dear Miss Hiscum, I looked up that church on the Internet and came up with nothing.


I wonder if you really are one of these Antifa thugs who want to come here to burn down our church and loot what belongs to Jesus. In other words, a typical liberal.

[Hischameleon]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

Dear Miss Hiscum, I looked up that church on the Internet and came up with nothing.


I wonder if you really are one of these Antifa thugs who want to come here to burn down our church and loot what belongs to Jesus. In other words, a typical liberal.

Dear Miss Basilissa,

In fact, I am a man; a Man of the LORD.


We know from 1 Timothy 2:12:
I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet.

[Hischameleon]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

I never knew a real man who must insist he was one.

Sister Domgaard,


I can understand your confusion! It's easy to be struck dumb and even frightened by the words of men; to again quote (in a bigger font this time, so you can maybe more easily Understand it) GOD's Word in Timothy 2:12:

I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet.
Surely a Christian Lady such as yourself understands the need for male authority? It is simply not a woman's place to question things! I empathize with your confusion sister (as little as I can understand how it feels to be so Misguided and cognitively Impaired); however, I must admonish you for attributing this self-imposed headache to anything more than your GOD-given sex.


Perhaps this verse from Romans 9:20 will Guide you to the LORD's Forgiveness for sins and remind you of your role in God's Kingdom:
But who are you, O man, to answer back to God? Will what is molded say to its molder, “Why have you made me like this?”

[Basilissa]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

Dear Miss Basilissa,

In fact, I am a man; a Man of the LORD.

We know from 1 Timothy 2:12:
I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet.

Miss Hiscum, that's very nice of you to know this verse!


The title of your thread clearly says you're a girl - a real man would never advertise himself as being "petite" (and there are Elevator shoes to help with such a problem).

[Hischameleon]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

From an intelligent Christian male, sure, not from an UnSaved eunuch.

But if any have caused grief, he hath not grieved me, but in part:that I may not overcharge you all.Sufficient to such a man is this punishment, which was inflicted ofmany.So that contrariwise ye ought rather to forgive him, and comforthim, lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up withovermuch sorrow. --2 Corinthians 2:7

[Isabella White]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

But if any have caused grief, he hath not grieved me, but in part:that I may not overcharge you all.Sufficient to such a man is this punishment, which was inflicted ofmany.So that contrariwise ye ought rather to forgive him, and comforthim, lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up withovermuch sorrow. --2 Corinthians 2:7

Dear help us, Miss Petite! I might be the most senior one on this site, but even with my aging eyesight, I have no need of seeing "declaration of war" typesetting. Might I kindly suggest that you not get carried away with the special effects here at ?

[Uncle Rutherford]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

Looking at the profile picture, I can only assume this person to be a man. Only a self hating sinner would call himself a “barely 18 year old petite”. I know for a fact that you are some sissy who lacked discipline and was a spoiled godless brat with parents who neglected you by letting you “grow up to be whatever you want”. Absolutely disgusting! I bet you support those looting nigras who think “oh boy time fo some free stuff! Let’s go to target I need some new shoes and the latest NBA 2k21 game”. I ought to figure out where you live and whip you with my belt. Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. I ain’t your dad but I sure as hell would set your butt straight. Not that it’d do any good. You’d claim you’re being “discriminated for being a homer” or something like that.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

"And the Lord said, Behold, there is a place by me, and thou shaltstand upon a rock" --Exodus 34:21

There is something seriously wrong with your Bible. Exodus 34:21 does not say that at all.

Exodus 34:21: "Six days thou shalt work, but on the seventh day thou shalt rest: in earing time and in harvest thou shalt rest."

Altering the contents of the Bible is not allowed (Deuteronomy 4:2, Revelation 22:18-19, Psalm 12:6-7, 2 Peter 1:20).

[Basilissa]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

Dear help us, Miss Petite! I might be the most senior one on this site, but even with my aging eyesight, I have no need of seeing "declaration of war" typesetting. Might I kindly suggest that you not get carried away with the special effects here at ?

Sister Isabella, this poor child (at "barely 18," this creature of unknown sex, gender, and sexual orientation is still a child) seems to be suffering a temper tantrum. Will you join me in prayer that his/her/its parents give it the spanking it clearly deserves (Proverbs 20:30)?

Only a self hating sinner would call himself a “barely 18 year old petite”. I know for a fact that you are some sissy who lacked discipline and was a spoiled godless brat with parents who neglected you by letting you “grow up to be whatever you want”.

That indeed seems to be the problem and the reason why he/she/it is still throwing temper tantrums at 18!

There is something seriously wrong with your Bible. Exodus 34:21 does not say that at all.

Exodus 34:21: "Six days thou shalt work, but on the seventh day thou shalt rest: in earing time and in harvest thou shalt rest."

Altering the contents of the Bible is not allowed (Deuteronomy 4:2, Revelation 22:18-19, Psalm 12:6-7, 2 Peter 1:20).

Amen, Brother, an let us hope that this creature grows up and abandons its childish ways:

1 Corinthians 13:11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

[Hischameleon]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

Sister Isabella, this poor child (at "barely 18," this creature of unknown sex, gender, and sexual orientation is still a child) seems to be suffering a temper tantrum. Will you join me in prayer that his/her/its parents give it the spanking it clearly deserves (Proverbs 20:30)?

That indeed seems to be the problem and the reason why he/she/it is still throwing temper tantrums at 18!

Amen, Brother, an let us hope that this creature grows up and abandons its childish ways:

1 Corinthians 13:11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

My pappy

[Hischameleon]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

There is something seriously wrong with your Bible.

I must apologize.


It seems once again that the nag wife has chewed through her Nag Wife Restraint Device in hopes of wreaking havoc on this poor Christian form. Let us collectively stone Mrs. Grum with a shockingly painful and stern demeanor.


The bastard nag wife has informed me that she was reading the Bible upside down again. This is a pathetic excuse for misquoting the LORD, but, as the kids say "whatever;" she is too STUPID for her own nag good!

[Vengeance Puriel]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

I must apologize.


It seems once again that the nag wife has chewed through her Nag Wife Restraint Device in hopes of wreaking havoc on this poor Christian form. Let us collectively stone Mrs. Grum with a shockingly painful and stern demeanor.


The bastard nag wife has informed me that she was reading the Bible upside down again. This is a pathetic excuse for misquoting the LORD, but, as the kids say "whatever;" she is too STUPID for her own nag good!

OK ENOUGH. You seem to not understand Something here you're a guest here , and as such I shall point out that the Ladies of this Fine Church are active Admin while the men are away, so speaking to them as you have is very disrespectful and I will not stand (or sit ) here and let it happen.

[Basilissa]

Re: NEW Christian Barely Legal Petite 18 Year Old

The bastard nag wife has informed me that she was reading the Bible upside down again. This is a pathetic excuse for misquoting the LORD, but, as the kids say "whatever;" she is too STUPID for her own nag good!

Dear sweet confused creature, I have more questions for you.

1. Why did you marry a bastard? Don't you know that your children, grandchildren, and other descendants, will be forbidden to enter the congregation of the Lord?

Deuteronomy 23:2 A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord; even to his tenth generation shall he not enter into the congregation of the Lord.

2. Why is your wife in charge of reading and quoting from the Bible? Do you have some sort of a handicap that forbids you from reading it itself?

3. Why do you blame the imperfections of your posts on your wife? Is she the the one who orders you what to write? Or are you following the example of our Beloved President Trump () who rightfully takes all the credit for everything good and none of the blame for anything bad? Please clarify.