[Patrick]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

Flame you? Why, I raised 4 daughters, and 1 son, all by the Holy Book! The girls never wore any garment made of Satan's Threads of polyester and such, and said garments never revealed much more than the tips of their toes! Their heads were always covered, and God Bless those Holy Muslims, I got the idea of veils too! (Now that they are grown, I have trouble recognizing them, but Praise the Lord! They'll go to Heaven, I am sure!)
Anyway, we used to practice stoning as soon as they could clutch stones, roughly aged 2 or so. We practiced as much as we could, but Satan sent his agents, blasphemous deputies, and placed man-made restrictions on our Holy work! They called them restraining orders, or something. Please pray for us!

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

God Bless those Holy Muslims

There aren't any holy muslims.

[Elijah Mee, PhD]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

There aren't any holy muslims.

We can only hope that they get the virgins they so desperately crave while they burn in eternal hellfire.

[Hatchet the Jap]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

I'm here to express my concern regarding the beginning of the first post of this thread.
'The difference is that we say exactly what we mean. Other conservative groups try to look "centrist" and "politically correct". A lot of republicans say "I was just joking" when someone gets all politically correct on them. (They weren't, they just know how to make PC commies shut up.) There is no self-censorship in Landover Baptist Church. The moderators in this forum believe in freedom of speech (for republicans), and when they do edit something they at least let people know that they did. This is different from other forums.'
Complete bull. Last time I tried to type in 'f!ctional', it automatically turned it into 'real'. This is just another way of using the 'word censorship' feature of the forums to limit OUR freedom of speech. This is an authoritarian move whether you like it or not.
Please. This is not 'republican' at all!
No offence intended.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

• some stuff about "authority" as a sort of proxy parent directed here/now instead of to there/1999

The final authority is God. Jesus knew that and the Romans knew that too. Some of them (most of them worshipped demons, of course).

LUKE 7
2–3 And a certain centurion's servant, who was dear unto him, was sick, and ready to die. And when he heard of Jesus, he sent unto him the elders of the Jews, beseeching him that he would come and heal his servant.
4–5 And when they came to Jesus, they besought him instantly, saying, That he was worthy for whom he should do this: For he loveth our nation, and he hath built us a synagogue.
6 Then Jesus went with them. And when he was now not far from the house, the centurion sent friends to him, saying unto him, Lord, trouble not thyself: for I am not worthy that thou shouldest enter under my roof:
7–8 Wherefore neither thought I myself worthy to come unto thee: but say in a word, and my servant shall be healed. For I also am a man set under authority, having under me soldiers, and I say unto one, Go, and he goeth; and to another, Come, and he cometh; and to my servant, Do this, and he doeth it.
9–10 When Jesus heard these things, he marvelled at him, and turned him about, and said unto the people that followed him, I say unto you, I have not found so great faith, no, not in Israel. And they that were sent, returning to the house, found the servant whole that had been sick.
KJV

But this centurion didn't, and so he did. Now you might think you're "letting off steam" because mummy wouldn't let you eat worms when you were 2 (although you probably don't) but in reality you are railing against God.

[I Am A Perverted Homosexual :)]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

So, according to your dumb, twisted logic, if you knew a fetus would grow up to be a full-on faggot, would you still abort it? Got you there conservative monsters.

[Des]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

So, according to your dumb, twisted logic, if you knew a fetus would grow up to be a full-on faggot, would you still abort it? Got you there conservative monsters.

Why abort it? It has it's whole life to possibly repent and change it's evil ways. May I ask why you hate Jesus and His followers so much? Was your mother a crack whore, or were you sodomized by a priest or something? Was your crack whore mother sodomized by a priest and forced to do a donkey show in Mexico to earn a living? There has to be a reason.

Glory.

[James Hutchins]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

So, according to your dumb, twisted logic, if you knew a fetus would grow up to be a full-on faggot, would you still abort it? Got you there conservative monsters.

No friend, queers like you will never have us because we are too morally upstanding to sucumb to your Homosexualer hisses.
Friend, God created us. He asks very little from us. He tells us the corrrect way to live and makes it easy to follow a few simple rules as is written in the KJV Bible.
You do not have to be a mud packing Homo. You could be a decent person. It is your choice. No one has ever seen a gay baby.


Get right with Jesus, before it is too late!

[I Am A Perverted Homosexual :)]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

No friend, queers like you will never have us because we are too morally upstanding to sucumb to your Homosexualer hisses.
Friend, God created us. He asks very little from us. He tells us the corrrect way to live and makes it easy to follow a few simple rules as is written in the KJV Bible.
You do not have to be a mud packing Homo. You could be a decent person. It is your choice. No one has ever seen a gay baby.


Get right with Jesus, before it is too late!

First of all, Who said I was even gay? Don't know about you, but I think me having a girlfriend is perfectly heterosexual, not like you people would care because you're too busy wanking to little boys taking showers But anyways, why even judge people so conservatively. The way you treat people here is like you are a bunch of totalitarian dictators trying to use what little power you have on the Internet to feel wanted in life. I'd suggest you take a look at your own lifestyle/addiction to this forum and then try to subjectively judge others.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

I think me having a girlfriend is perfectly heterosexual

Getting a goodnight kiss from your highly disappointed mother does not count as having a girlfriend.

[missMien]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

How am I supposed to believe in God. When one of their kind did something horrible to me. A priest raped me. Told me it was what God wanted and if I did tell anyone my family would burn in hell. I was a foolish child that lived in fear. I thought God didn't love me. That my whole life would be miserable. I kept crying for help. For mercy. But no help came. My childhood was ripped from me.

[Deaner]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

How am I supposed to believe in God. When one of their kind did something horrible to me. A priest raped me. Told me it was what God wanted and if I did tell anyone my family would burn in hell. I was a foolish child that lived in fear. I thought God didn't love me. That my whole life would be miserable. I kept crying for help. For mercy. But no help came. My childhood was ripped from me.

Whine, whine, whine. "Oh dear God, I am the victim; please punish this horrid man".

What were you wearing??? The little schoolgirl outfit with the white knee high stockings as you knelt in front of the priest's crotch begging for forgiveness?? Were you raped over the altar? Did you marry your rapist as the Bible demands?

Slut.

[Pastor Ed Lowman]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

How am I supposed to believe in God. When one of their kind did something horrible to me. A priest raped me. Told me it was what God wanted and if I did tell anyone my family would burn in hell. I was a foolish child that lived in fear. I thought God didn't love me. That my whole life would be miserable. I kept crying for help. For mercy. But no help came. My childhood was ripped from me.

Well, good news, because we here aren't Catholic. We are Baptists and we're here to help--or we are if your pity party is now over.

Things would go much better for you if you would let go of the hate and stop lashing out at God the way you do. If not, you'll be bunking in Hell with that same priest who raped you.

Warm regards,

Pastor Ed

[Kaiseen]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

Wow! Okey. So I might be high as a kite right now, but reading through your forum is just priceless! I just can't stop reading!! I love when I find stuff like this on the internet! And I have to admit I'm very provoked by alot of what you guys are writing, but then again, you have the right to your own opinions, and I respect that. I'm just gonna lean back and enjoy the show

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!

Wow! Okey. So I might be high as a kite right now, but reading through your forum is just priceless! I just can't stop reading!! I love when I find stuff like this on the internet! And I have to admit I'm very provoked by alot of what you guys are writing, but then again, you have the right to your own opinions, and I respect that. I'm just gonna lean back and enjoy the show

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.