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  • #1

    Hi there

    My name is Joseph or Joe,
    I found this forum today.
    Greetings all fellow Christians,
    I have a question, what do I do...
    This girl forces me to have sex with her,
    But I say no and push her away.
    But she threatens me, sometimes with violence.
    Sometimes she comes to me naked and tries to seduce me.
    She is very evil and I want to resist.
    I thought of buying a chastity belt?
    Is that a good idea?
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Re: Hi there

    Originally posted by Joseph Oliver View Post
    My name is Joseph or Joe,
    I found this forum today.
    Greetings all fellow Christians,
    I have a question, what do I do...
    This girl forces me to have sex with her,
    But I say no and push her away.
    But she threatens me, sometimes with violence.
    Sometimes she comes to me naked and tries to seduce me.
    She is very evil and I want to resist.
    I thought of buying a chastity belt?
    Is that a good idea?
    Joe, Welcome to the friendliest forum on the internets

    sad to hear that you aren't man enough to teach that whore her place!
    also I am sorry for your extremely bad grammar and begin a Britt, what sins did your parents commit that you were born as a sissy britt?

    also what is your favourite verse in the bible?
    Brininging true christianity ™ to the Eskimo wastelands of the north!

    Romans 14:1
    As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Hi there

      Originally posted by Joseph Oliver View Post
      My name is Joseph or Joe,
      I found this forum today.
      Greetings all fellow Christians,
      I have a question, what do I do...
      This girl forces me to have sex with her,
      But I say no and push her away.
      But she threatens me, sometimes with violence.
      Sometimes she comes to me naked and tries to seduce me.
      She is very evil and I want to resist.
      I thought of buying a chastity belt?
      Is that a good idea?
      Please do not write in blank verse unless you intend to post in the Poetasters' Forum

      Your story seems unlikely but it may be related to the fact that you don't know your name.

      How do you know this girl? Where does she live? Have you informed your pastor so that he might address the young lady?
      sigpic


      “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

      Author of such illuminating essays as,
      Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Hi there

        Contact Child and Family services immediately! Your mother should not be doing that to you.
        Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: Hi there

          Originally posted by Joseph Oliver View Post
          My name is Joseph or Joe,
          I found this forum today.
          Greetings all fellow Christians,
          I have a question, what do I do...
          This girl forces me to have sex with her,
          But I say no and push her away.
          But she threatens me, sometimes with violence.
          Sometimes she comes to me naked and tries to seduce me.
          She is very evil and I want to resist.
          I thought of buying a chastity belt?
          Is that a good idea?
          This is the INTRODUCTION forum. You're supposed to introduce yourself.

          If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

          If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

          You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

          Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Hi there

            I suggest you stop walking the streets of London in the early hours of the morning then you wan't be harassed by prostitutes also England has produced some fine poets but i am afraid you are not one of them.
            The Shela Tansper corrective school for boys 13 to 18 years old

            King James Bible v1611
            A passage a day keeps satan away

            Comment

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