HI Fellow God Lovers!

[IloveGod69]

My name is Graham, and I'm sort of a big deal. You see, every other day for the past three years I have been volunteering at my house of God and spreading the word of our Lord. I've spent over three thousand dollars I earned through yard work purchasing Bibles and giving them to whoever I feel needs the good book.

So, one fateful day recently, I was walking down the road and holy fucking christ, they put a fucking White Castle in my town. So I took one of my Bibles and I ripped out all the boring and false shit(all of it) and rolled alot of joints. I got high as shit, and then I ate at White Castle. I then saw this middle easterner who looked just like Jesus! In fact its proven that Jesus was a dark skinned guy. Just like those people you call towel heads! Anyways, so I went to White Castle and Jesus-fuck-me-on the cross that shit was good! I went to shit and there was no toilet paper so I used the Bible (lol). Anyways, I just wanted to tell you that I talked to God, and he said that he is disgusted by your butchering of faith to support political issues and taking the bible out of context to support arguments that arent even religious. Religion is about tolerance and happiness, and you stupid hicks fucked up. You see, I might not believe in Christianity but I believe in happiness through understanding. Of course, you people understanding anything is like asking Jesus not to fuck some whores-Its not fuckin happening.

So keep hating on your shit online forum, I just stopped by to tell you that I'm really glad I'm going to college to be successful rather than withering away condemning people when God really doesn't give a fuck about any of you.

I do believe in some sort of God and I feel quite close to him, so fuck off.

Whatever I earned was by me, I'm not going to be a pussy in my life and pray for everything.

So yeah it was a bit hypocritical of me to flame you in some ways, but why shouldn't I? You're all ignorant as shit, racists and probably in closet gays. Which, by the way, being gay is ok too. I know I like pussy so why would I care what other people do.

So keep projecting your insecurities, and I'm gonna go smoke a blunt and do some coke with my NOT WHITE FRIEND.

The worst part is you think you're serving God. Go ahead mother fuckers, tell me I'm going to Hell all you want while I'm getting laid and living life to the fullest.

And if you were actual Christians, you would argue this rather than flame me back and delete it. BUT YA WONT. Why? Cause you're too damn stupid.

P.s. whatsup with that Billy Bob Jenkins asshole? Doesn't like anal sex? You ever fuck a girl in the ass? Its fuckin awesome yo. HAHAHAH all you have in life is chopping wood. Fuck me right, I'd be on a forum too if my life sucked that much dick.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

*blah, blah, I hate Jesus, blah* I'd be on a forum too if my life sucked that much dick.

And here you are!

[IloveGod69]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

Ha well played my good sir. However, I don't have 10000 posts.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

So what happened in your life that was the thing used by God to motivate you to come here? How did Jesus call to you?

[Jedediah]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

Oh, how I relish your persecution! I absolutely revel in it! Oh, how it reminds me that I bear my own cross every day when hateful bigots like yourself cast aspersions on my beliefs and everything I hold dear!

Matthew 10:22
And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved.

Luke 6:22
Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man's sake.

I Corinthians 4:12
And labour, working with our own hands: being reviled, we bless; being persecuted, we suffer it:

Please persecute me more! With each hateful word, you only reinforce my faith in JESUS even more. Give us the best you have, hatemonger, and I will turn the other cheek and give you blessings!

Romans 12:14
Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not.

[IloveGod69]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

MY God is black liek Morgan Freeman

[Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

My name is Graham, and I'm sort of a big deal. You see, every other day for the past three years I have been volunteering at my house of God and spreading the word of our Lord. I've spent over three thousand dollars I earned through yard work purchasing Bibles and giving them to whoever I feel needs the good book.

Judging by the rest of your rant, you are lying here.

So I took one of my Bibles and I ripped out all the boring and false shit(all of it) and rolled alot of joints.

The Bible boring? Are you ten years old? Anyone who can read on a 5th grade level would never call the Bible boring.

I then saw this middle easterner who looked just like Jesus! In fact its proven that Jesus was a dark skinned guy.

Are you sure about that? Jesus' ancestor was King David. The Bible calls David "ruddy (or red headed) with a fair (white) countenance (face).

Just like those people you call towel heads! Anyways, so I went to White Castle and Jesus-piffle-me-on the cross that shit was good!

Vulgar, retarded and greasy faced is no way to go through life, son.

I talked to God, and he said that he is disgusted by your butchering of faith to support political issues and taking the bible out of context to support arguments that arent even religious.

Finally, we get down to the crux of the matter. You come in here being disgusting and without knowledge and proceed to tell us we are doing Christianity all wrong.

Religion is about tolerance and happiness,

Chapter and verse from the Bible please. See, if you weren't busy using the Bible as toilet paper and rolling papers, you would know what the Bible says about tolerance. I will give you some credit. Unlike most false Christians, at least you admit that you use the Bible to wipe your ass.

God really doesn't give a piffle about any of you.

I see. Now you know what God thinks and feels. Arrogant much?

I do believe in some sort of God and I feel quite close to him, so piffle off.

I'm sure you do, son. It's too bad the feeling is not mutual.
Psalm 5:5 The foolish shall not stand in thy sight: thou hatest all workers of iniquity.

You see, God hates you.

So yeah it was a bit hypocritical of me to flame you in some ways, but why shouldn't I? You're all ignorant as shit, racists and probably in closet gays. Which, by the way, being gay is ok too. I know I like pussy so why would I care what other people do.

You call us fags as a pejorative and then proceed to say that homosexuality is okay. Why don't you ask that false god you serve what he thinks about queers? Better still, why not pick up a Bible and actually try reading it to see what the True Living God thinks about homosexuality?

Oh wait never mind, you already admitted you aren't intelligent enough to actually read the Bible.

So keep projecting your insecurities, and I'm gonna go smoke a blunt and do some coke with my NOT WHITE FRIEND.

Might I suggest meth? It will get you to your master Satan sooner. I'm sure you want that, right?

The worst part is you think you're serving God.

Chapter and verse that says we aren't.

Go ahead mother piffleers, tell me I'm going to Hell all you want while I'm getting laid and living life to the fullest.

Your bravado betrays the fact that you know you are going to hell and you are scared.

Is that going to be your excuse to God on the day of judgment? "I was doing a bunch of cocaine and having sex with my boyfriend Tyrone. I was just living life to the fullest!"

[Faith_Machine]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

I'm sorry, but ILoveGod69's post was too shocking for me. I'll just be over here, curled up in a fetal position, a broken shell of my former self.

[Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

I'm sorry, but ILoveGod69's post was too shocking for me. I'll just be over here, curled up in a fetal position, a broken shell of my former self.

It's just some teen using his mommy's email address or it's some middle age woman trying to be "cool" and act like she is 14.

Either way it's a shame. She is either a horrible mother who deserves to have her children taken away for doing cocaine or she has no control over her teen age children. They are allowed to go out and bring shame on their family.

[Zechariah Smyth]

I'm getting laid and living life to the fullest.

Which explains why you come to a Christian message board to fail-troll.



Also: sounds like SOMEONE has a little man-crush on Brother Billy Bob. Give it up, pal. He HATES anal sex.

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth
Posted via Mobile Device

[s. warnin]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

three thousand dollars I earned through yard work

You must be Messican. I bet you don't report your earnings to the IRS. You sound like one of those illegals trying to knock up decent, law-abiding American women for "anchor babies."

What kind of "yard work" exactly, do you do?

[Leadbelly]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

You think you are smart for eating white castle and college?? ha.

You do not even know how to read the bible I am sure

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

God will not be mocked!

Jude 1:17 But, beloved, remember ye the words which were spoken before of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ;
1:18 How that they told you there should be mockers in the last time, who should walk after their own ungodly lusts.
1:19 These be they who separate themselves, sensual, having not the Spirit.

[Bible Student]

Re: HI Fellow God Lovers!

My name is Graham, I got high as shit, and then I ate at White Castle.

First you say you are a college kid. Then you say you eat at White Castle. Were I you, I would ask for my money back. College is doing you no good, especially in the maths department. Just for your information, there is so little beef in one of their postage stamps that you are paying $64 a pound for the beef.

And your post goes downhill from there.

On the bright side, since you've addled your brain with drugs, you might be smart enough for them to let you back into grade school.