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  • #16
    Re: Hello, I'm new

    Kat, I suggest you leave this site immediately. You appear to be too good of a person to let these hypnotists corrupt you :]
    ~ThatWiccanKid

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    • #17
      Re: Hello, I'm new

      Originally posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
      Kat, I suggest you leave this site immediately. You appear to be too good of a person to let these hypnotists corrupt you :]
      ~ThatWiccanKid
      Kat! Don't listen to the lies of this Hell-bound idolater! See what God says about being a "good person"...Romans 3:23 "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;"

      Confess your sins and repent Kat. Before it's too late.
      Jeremiah 23:29 Is not my word like as a fire? saith the LORD; and like a hammer that breaketh the rock in pieces?

      Ephesians 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

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      • #18
        Re: Hello, I'm new

        I'm bringing an air conditioner down with me, so Hell can be a nice tropical paradise for when I get there :]
        ~ThatWiccanKid

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        • #19
          Re: Hello, I'm new

          Originally posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
          I'm bringing an air conditioner down with me, so Hell can be a nice tropical paradise for when I get there :]
          ~ThatWiccanKid
          You'll get no sympathy from me when Satan cracks that air conditioner open and uses a funnel to pour refrigerant down your throat.
          WARNING:
          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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          • #20
            Re: Hello, I'm new

            Whoa, I'm impressed. You've got quite a sadistic imagination there, don't cha? With that kinda talk, I'll be seeing you down there. Just think, maybe we grab a smoothie together or something?
            ~ThatWiccanKid

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            • #21
              Re: Hello, I'm new

              Originally posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
              Whoa, I'm impressed. You've got quite a sadistic imagination there, don't cha? With that kinda talk, I'll be seeing you down there. Just think, maybe we grab a smoothie together or something?
              ~ThatWiccanKid
              May I ask why you're here?

              We're here to praise Jesus.
              WARNING:
              In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
              REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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              • #22
                Re: Hello, I'm new

                Let's see here...Revelation 21:8 "But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death." Doesn't say anything about smoothies where you're going....
                Jeremiah 23:29 Is not my word like as a fire? saith the LORD; and like a hammer that breaketh the rock in pieces?

                Ephesians 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

                Comment


                • #23
                  Re: Hello, I'm new

                  Originally posted by ThatGayKid View Post
                  Kat, I suggest you leave this site immediately. You appear to be too good of a person to let these hypnotists corrupt you :]
                  ~ThatWiccanKid
                  Besides knowing nothing about hypnotism, what else do you know little to nothing about? It would be a neat trick to hypnotize someone over the InterWebs.
                  YiJC, BS

                  II Peter 1:4 -- Whereby are giuen vnto vs exceeding great and precious promises, that by these you might bee partakers of thy diuine nature, hauing escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

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                  • #24
                    Re: Hello, I'm new

                    Originally posted by s. warnin View Post
                    KittyKat, I can't emphasize enough the need for you to confess the things you have done, so that you may receive healing through the concerned prayers of others here.

                    James 5:16 "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."

                    Proverbs 28:13 "He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: But whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy."

                    1 John 1:9 " If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

                    So you see young lady, the first step to forgiveness and healing is to confess all of your filthy sins. Don't hold back. Confess and be free!

                    Peace be with you...
                    i can do that, umm but i would rather do so mreo privately first, my contact details should be on my page, if not my email is *redacted*, i have yahoo messenger too

                    i am sorry about this
                    Last edited by Mrs. Mary Whitford; 09-17-2011, 06:00 PM. Reason: This is not a cheap "pick-up joint" you floozy!
                    xxx Kat xxx

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                    • #25
                      Re: Hello, I'm new

                      Originally posted by KittyKat View Post
                      i can do that, umm but i would rather do so mreo privately first, my contact details should be on my page, if not my email is *redacted*, i have yahoo messenger too

                      i am sorry about this
                      Oh, it's so nice that you're so open to receiving the Lord's love! It's not a good idea to post your e-mail address publicly, however, as we've often been besieged by perverts who come here trying to initiate cyber-sex relationships with young girls.
                      WARNING:
                      In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                      REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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                      • #26
                        Re: Hello, I'm new

                        Originally posted by KittyKat View Post
                        i can do that, umm but i would rather do so mreo privately first, my contact details should be on my page, if not my email is *redacted*, i have yahoo messenger too

                        i am sorry about this
                        Dear Kitty;

                        I understand your fears. My join date says 2006 but I have been here somewhat longer than that (I think, I don't use my time as a servant to Christ as some kind of badge of honour) and I can spot a sincere seeker as soon as I meet one.

                        You are a sweet girl. Eager to do what is right and to please your Lord to the best of your ability. It brings tears to my eyes to finally see our mostly rebellious children choose the path you have. But you must understand...

                        Confession to the Lord unburdens your soul. It releases you from the torment and shame that satan consistently whispers in your ear to keep you under his power. Please allow me to make a suggestion; a compromise if you will.

                        Your biggest problem seems to be unnatural acts with other women. Now please understand... this is satan; not you. You are young and virile with a firm body, bust, and buttocks and the sexual appetite of a wild boar. Of course you would be a favourite target of satan. But you must understand that we are only here to help. We at Landover do not give in to the passions of Satan and are only here to serve you.

                        What I suggest is that you send any pictures or videos of yourself and your obviously possessed friends to me in complete confidence. I will then assemble a group of the finest pastors to review them to see if we can tell if it is an actual possession or if your friends are just deviant sluts leading you down the road to perdition.

                        Unfortunately, there is a $500 charge for this service. I am sure your father would not have a problem donating this to our church as he seems to genuinely care for you. We will handle the rest.

                        One more question; does your father ever touch you in places that make you feel "uncomfortable" or "squishy" between your thigh's? Please let us know as soon as possible. I am afraid you are in great need of help.

                        Yours In Christ

                        Deaner

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                        • #27
                          Re: Hello, I'm new

                          Once again I am minded of the thoughtless fools who rush in here ranting about how uncaring we are. Yet here we see good brother Deaner bending over backwards to save this floozy from Satan's clutches because he has heard her plaintive appeal for God's loving rather than fornication.

                          The lengths true Christians will go to to fully understand the perversions of others in order that they open themselves wide to be filled with the love of Christ is truly humbling.

                          And yet people say, because we rightly rebuke those sinners who come here to mock God, that we are unfriendly.

                          Brother Deaner, your loving self-sacrifice and willingness to expose yourself to temptation on behalf of this potential harlot is exemplary.

                          GLORY
                          sigpic
                          Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

                          John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

                          Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
                          The truth about volcanos
                          Sex and debauchery in public schools
                          Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
                          God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
                          Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

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                          • #28
                            Re: Hello, I'm new

                            There's no charge for sending them to me. My email link is at the bottom of my signature. 100% True Christian(tm) counseling, completely confidential and full of discretion, I swear to God.
                            Who Will Jesus Damn?

                            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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                            • #29
                              Re: Hello, I'm new

                              I'll help you out for $250 there sugartits......

                              oops, soory, there's that satan speaking for me again.

                              On a side note, what's with the guy named Redeemed Rapist doing on a Christian site like this? Oh Lord!!!

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Re: Hello, I'm new

                                Originally posted by ge-sus is long dead View Post
                                I'll help you out for $250 there sugartits......

                                oops, soory, there's that satan speaking for me again.

                                On a side note, what's with the guy named Redeemed Rapist doing on a Christian site like this? Oh Lord!!!
                                Do you sniff glue before you type your posts?
                                WARNING:
                                In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                                REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                                Comment

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