Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

[Faith_Machine]

I have been in isolated prayer for the last 72 hours, and I feel the Lord has given me an ultimatum.

He seems to be telling me that if we don't get twenty new members to post introductory threads within the next ten days, and if each of them don't accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior...

Well friends, I think the Lord is going to end my life if I can't win those twenty souls for Him over the next ten days.

So to those of you who've been lurking here, and "on the fence" about whether to register an account and post an introductory thread, now is the time to do it!

Please post a separate introductory thread and tell us all about your walk with Jesus! I need two newcomers per day to do this! Two per day, for the next ten days!

Otherwise, the Lord is going to call me home.

[Didymus Much]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

...Otherwise, the Lord is going to call me home.

And can I have your car?

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Rest assured, I've taken precautions to make sure my mobile prayer center never falls into atheist hands. My will was drawn up a long time ago, and Landover Baptist Church is the sole beneficiary.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Did we get at least two new members today, and have they accepted Jesus Christ as their personal savior?

Oh, I hope so!

[Elijah Mee, PhD]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

I will be praying for you, friend.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Thank you, my brother!

What's the running tally right now? I many new members do we have, and how many of them have accepted Jesus?

Oh my goodness, this is exciting! It's so amazing to see how the Lord works His miracles!

[worthlessdavid]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

I have been in isolated prayer for the last 72 hours, and I feel the Lord has given me an ultimatum.

He seems to be telling me that if we don't get twenty new members to post introductory threads within the next ten days, and if each of them don't accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior...

Well friends, I think the Lord is going to end my life if I can't win those twenty souls for Him over the next ten days.

So to those of you who've been lurking here, and "on the fence" about whether to register an account and post an introductory thread, now is the time to do it!

Please post a separate introductory thread and tell us all about your walk with Jesus! I need two newcomers per day to do this! Two per day, for the next ten days!

Otherwise, the Lord is going to call me home.

didn't see this when i signed up

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Worthless, welcome, friend! Tell me, have you accepted Jesus Christ as your savior yet? For my sake, I certainly hope you have!

[Basilissa]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Beloved Brother Faith, there have been several newcomers recently, but I'm afraid none of them is getting saved! I fear for your future! I'll pray for you!

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Thank you Basilissa!

I'm looking forward to being with Jesus, but there are so many loose ends that need to be dealt with before I go.

Does anybody know how God feels about people dying with unpaid car loans?

Also, could somebody take my cat?

[Basilissa]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Thank you Basilissa!

I'm looking forward to being with Jesus, but there are so many loose ends that need to be dealt with before I go.

Does anybody know how God feels about people dying with unpaid car loans?

Also, could somebody take my cat?

I can take care of your cat, but not your loans.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Bless you, Basilissa! I should clarify that it's actually an auto lease, as opposed to an auto loan.

This may pose a problem at the end of the two-year lease, as I did sign paperwork saying I wouldn't alter the vehicle in any way. I'm afraid I may get dinged for applying some inspirational messages to the outside.

[Basilissa]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Bless you, Basilissa! I should clarify that it's actually an auto lease, as opposed to an auto loan.

This may pose a problem at the end of the two-year lease, as I did sign paperwork saying I wouldn't alter the vehicle in any way. I'm afraid I may get dinged for applying some inspirational messages to the outside.

Beautiful car

I see no problem in the company leasing this car to another True Christian(tm). Really, who wouldn't want to own such a beauty?

[WWJDnow]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

I see no problem in the company leasing this car to another True Christian™. Really, who wouldn't want to own such a beauty?

And if they can't find a True Christian™ to take it, I'm sure there a plenty of Mexicans who'd love to drive a beauty like that. Although they'd probably have to remove the "work" sticker to sell into that market.

[worthlessdavid]

Re: Urgent help needed from Unsaved Trash!

Worthless, welcome, friend! Tell me, have you accepted Jesus Christ as your savior yet? For my sake, I certainly hope you have!

I have , sorry for not replying earlier.