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  • Brother Milton Dykes
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Dec 2013
    • 2

    #1

    Praise! I have been saved!

    Greetings to my fellow true Christians. I am very pleased that the road to salvation has led me to the doorsteps of this holy netsite and hope to further my knowledge and perhaps share some with my brothers and sisters in Christ.


    I, much like some of you, was a heathen that did nothing but get high on ellis dee, inject marijuana multiple times a day, masturbate non-stop, and create chaos all around me. Nothing was off limits. I was engaging in sexual intercourse with not just women and men but also (in my darkest of days) ventured outside of my race and made with non-normal like snow Mexicans (Canadians).


    Then one day I was searching the world wide web and began to find the teachings of Christ. I was intrigued. The more I read the more I realized how I as a privileged Caucasian American was meant for greater things. I was tired of dealing with the trash (non-normal) sinners. I knew there was more. It was then I fell to my knees and with my hands outreached, head back, mouth open and accept the Lord to fill my quaking body with his hot soothing love. The rest, as the say, is history!
  • Basilissa
    South of the Border outreach program
    True Christian™
     
    • Mar 2013
    • 12992

    #2
    Re: Praise! I have been saved!

    Originally posted by Brother Milton Dykes View Post
    Greetings to my fellow true Christians. I am very pleased that the road to salvation has led me to the doorsteps of this holy netsite and hope to further my knowledge and perhaps share some with my brothers and sisters in Christ.


    I, much like some of you, was a heathen that did nothing but get high on ellis dee, inject marijuana multiple times a day, masturbate non-stop, and create chaos all around me. Nothing was off limits. I was engaging in sexual intercourse with not just women and men but also (in my darkest of days) ventured outside of my race and made with non-normal like snow Mexicans (Canadians).


    Then one day I was searching the world wide web and began to find the teachings of Christ. I was intrigued. The more I read the more I realized how I as a privileged Caucasian American was meant for greater things. I was tired of dealing with the trash (non-normal) sinners. I knew there was more. It was then I fell to my knees and with my hands outreached, head back, mouth open and accept the Lord to fill my quaking body with his hot soothing love. The rest, as the say, is history!
    Sweetie,

    The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.
    God created fossils to test our faith.

    * * *

    My favorite LBC sermons:
    True Christians are Perfect!
    True Christian™ Love.
    Salvation™ made Easy!
    You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
    Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
    Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
    Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
    Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
    The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
    Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
    God HATES Rational Thinking!
    True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

    Comment

    • Mary Etheldreda
      Gushing for Jesus
       
      • Sep 2011
      • 23775

      #3
      Re: Praise! I have been saved!

      Well Praise and Glory! Hello, and a Merry CHRISTmas to you! How many little Soldiers of Christ have you implanted into the womb of your wife by now? What is you favorite way to spread the Good News that appropriately worshiping our Lord and Redeemer is more important than some liberal distraction about feeding, clothing, housing, educating the poor, ignorant masses?
      Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78556

        #4
        Re: Praise! I have been saved!

        Welcome to God's favorite forum. Please tell us about yourself, your church, and your walk with the Lord.

        If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

        If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

        You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

        Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Chester Longshire
          Forum Member
          Forum Member
          • Dec 2013
          • 172

          #5
          Re: Praise! I have been saved!

          I guess I want to know why you haven't already changed your name from "dyke" to something at least somewhat Christian-sounding like "Johnson," "Richards," or "Dickens?"
          This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN

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