[Cranky Old Man]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Do you ever get hard when writing these things?

Your obsession with sex and porn is getting the better of you. To make sure you stop staring at porn you now have to poke your own eyes out! The Bible is very clear on that: Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire". Since you can still see porn with one eye, you will have to poke both of them out.

You are probably also an obsessive compulsive masturbator. The Bible is very clear on what you have to do about that. You have to rent a chainsaw and remove your hand! Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched". To be on the safe side you might want to remove both hands.

And after you poked your eyes out and removed your hands you have to start reading your KJV1611 Holy Bible to prevent eternal damnation to hell .

[Gaps]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Your obsession with sex and porn is getting the better of you. To make sure you stop staring at porn you now have to poke your own eyes out! The Bible is very clear on that: Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire". Since you can still see porn with one eye, you will have to poke both of them out.

You are probably also an obsessive compulsive masturbator. The Bible is very clear on what you have to do about that. You have to rent a chainsaw and remove your hand! Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched". To be on the safe side you might want to remove both hands.

And after you poked your eyes out and removed your hands you have to start reading your KJV1611 Holy Bible to prevent eternal damnation to hell .

Thats a tough one - i have no eyes then.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Thats a tough one - i have no eyes then.

Excuses, excuses, excuses. Just use the audio version of the KJV 1611 Holy Bible.

[Gaps]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Excuses, excuses, excuses. Just use the audio version of the KJV 1611 Holy Bible.

I would love that you read the KJV1611 for me?

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

I would love that you read the KJV1611 for me?

If you would visit me in Freehold I would gladly read to you from the Holy Bible.

[Gaps]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

If you would visit me in Freehold I would gladly read to you from the Holy Bible.

So wheres Freehold? Cant really find it on the map of Iowa...

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

So wheres Freehold? Cant really find it on the map of Iowa...

It is near Des Moines. Just head to Des Moines and follow the signs to Freehold.

[fatherjack]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Infidels!

[Zamonien]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Hi

I just have a question regarding the punishment demanded earlier. How is a person supposed to wield a chainsaw to cut of the second hand, when he is already missing one hand and both eyes?

A friend of mine is trying to repent for his sins, and therefore willing to carry out your demand, but finds that discovering the correct approach to such an act troublesome

In hope of a satisfying answer

Zamonien

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Hi

I just have a question regarding the punishment demanded earlier. How is a person supposed to wield a chainsaw to cut of the second hand, when he is already missing one hand and both eyes?

A friend of mine is trying to repent for his sins, and therefore willing to carry out your demand, but finds that discovering the correct approach to such an act troublesome

In hope of a satisfying answer

Zamonien

Any real man knows that all his DIY problems solved with duct tape of course.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Hi

I just have a question regarding the punishment demanded earlier. How is a person supposed to wield a chainsaw to cut of the second hand, when he is already missing one hand and both eyes?

A friend of mine is trying to repent for his sins, and therefore willing to carry out your demand, but finds that discovering the correct approach to such an act troublesome

In hope of a satisfying answer

Zamonien

I found this thread very useful in punishing my late wife Ethel.

[BelieverInGod]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Hi

I just have a question regarding the punishment demanded earlier. How is a person supposed to wield a chainsaw to cut of the second hand, when he is already missing one hand and both eyes?

A friend of mine is trying to repent for his sins, and therefore willing to carry out your demand, but finds that discovering the correct approach to such an act troublesome

In hope of a satisfying answer

Zamonien

Clamp the chainsaw onto something and then just rest your wrists on it. Really, do we have to think of everything?

[danishdynamite]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Sorry, but racism is not tolerated on this board at all. You have a lot of nerve judging all Americans and Baptists and lumping them together in a stereotype. Instead of being so full of hate and talking bad about a different country's people, why don't you be more open-minded and tolerant? Show some respect to people of different beliefs and cultures.

You people make me sick!

you say we judge and hate so much and are not open. but what is this site just about. you call yourself a man of god but you have no right to even think of him so just go home to your cave and dig a deep hole and jump into it

we are red we are white we are danish dynamite

[danishdynamite]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

Sorry, but racism is not tolerated on this board at all. You have a lot of nerve judging all Americans and Baptists and lumping them together in a stereotype. Instead of being so full of hate and talking bad about a different country's people, why don't you be more open-minded and tolerant? Show some respect to people of different beliefs and cultures.

You people make me sick!

You must have a lot of friends with that attitude.

So you are denying Vikings to be rapists? Why do Danes always refuse to take responsibility? No doubt you are denying Rasmussen cheated in the Tour de France as well.
wich contry has most rapings now a days ( U.S and A)
He didnt cycle Tour de France

No. Proof? Here!
there is prof astrid lindgren wrote pippi longstocking she is swedish therefore pippi longstocking is swedish thats just normal sence. but maybe you dont even have a brain

I won't, you however will burn there for ever and ever .

quote: no hell no heaven.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: 8 Reasons why GOD HATES DENMARK!

we are red we are white we are danish dynamite

Can you please explode and stop visiting our forum?