[Brother Guy Bayard]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Have you convinced them to change that unGodly name yet?

Im leaving that task in the hands of the new converts. My role here is very much 'behind the scenes' as it were...
On a brighter note we did manage to destroy every book by pro-evilutionists in the darwin library!

[Father Thomas Martin]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Well, it's official; Papa Ben is Down Under!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080713/ap_on_re_au_an/australia_pope

Are you LBCers equipped to hand out your meaningless tracts? Well, we have a counter plan; Catholic Answers (the group led by Karl Keating) is going to be passing out copies of their booklet Pillar of Fire, Pillar of Truth to the youth there.

Maybe they'll keep your tracts though...would work great in case they need spare toilet paper!

[Wide-Open]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Well I'm all stoked for our huge Mission to Austria that's coming up. I haven't kept up with all the details, but I assume everything is going just fine. When am I supposed to leave? anyone got my itinerary?

I don't think I can help you Pastor.

I had a few problems of my own.



But anyway: I'M HERE!

Now just need to find the others. Will keep you up to date.

Matthew 25:14
For the kingdom of heaven is as a man travelling into a far country, who called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Well, it's official; Papa Ben

Is that like Papa Doc?

is Down Under!

Glory! He's in Hell. I knew Satan would take his own!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080713/ap_on_re_au_an/australia_pope

Catholic Answers (the group led by Karl Keating) is going to be passing out copies of their booklet Pillar of Fire, Pillar of Truth to the youth there.

You missed out the Pillock of Rome

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Okay, I'm supposed to be leaving tomorrow....What the heck is happening?

[bung79]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Very disorganised aren't we? Good luck getting through customs. Chances are you'll get strip searched and an 'internal' examination done.

Lol..

[Wide-Open]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Okay, I'm supposed to be leaving tomorrow....What the heck is happening?

Brother Abner is supposed to take care of you, but I haven't heard from him for a while. Maybe Sister Mary Maria can fill us in?

Very disorganised aren't we? Good luck getting through customs. Chances are you'll get strip searched and an 'internal' examination done.

If you are referring to "cavity searches", well yes, I had to endure one of those. They also confiscated my bullhorn. But they didn't touch my KJV nor my prayer cloth. Any shop in Perth selling bullhorns?

[Nobar King]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Brother W-O, you were supposed to go to SYDNEY, not Perth. I say you hire a taxi and get over there, quick!

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Okay, I'm supposed to be leaving tomorrow....What the heck is happening?

Never trust a Mexican't houseboy! He was supposed to deliver the memo to you weeks ago, Pastor! Due to security concerns, you won't be leaving tomorrow. Brother Abner had his "legal issues" cleared up after a phone call to Pastor Al who then had words with Vice President Cheney on a hunting trip (and managed to dodge a face full of buckshot), and, well, those "issues" are no more.
Brother Abner will be leading the team as planned, and will work with Brother Guy to ensure things are safe for you and other pastors and high-level tithers to join them in a few days. We expect you to join them in either the village of Melbourne or the village of Vienna in a few days. We do expect you to be preaching to the drunken savages this coming Sunday though!

[JennyD]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

I wish I could go. It all sounds so exciting, and dangerous!

Back when I was a girl at the orphanage, young Miss Baker used to tell all the kids stories about her trip to the jungles of Australia. Quicksand, man-eating kangaroos, abos demanding the rights of real humans, cannibals, and a population of rapists, robbers, rapists, murderers, and rapists!

She was a brave woman, and quite the firebrand for Jesus. After three years working at the orphanage in Chicago, during which I am happy to report she was not raped one single time, she decided that the city was not sufficiently in need of her brand of fire-and-brimstone evangelizing. She went back to Australia 15 years ago.

I still exchange postcards and Christmas cards with her. She's having a grand time doing the Lord's Work there! She's only just turned 39, which makes it more surprising that she has no access to a computer. Maybe Brother Guy can get in touch with her if I PM him her information? She's currently living in an area of Sydney called King's Cross; certainly a respectable-sounding area, though she claims there's plenty of witnessing to do there!

[Wide-Open]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Brother W-O, you were supposed to go to SYDNEY, not Perth. I say you hire a taxi and get over there, quick!

Oh dear, I read this only now. I got in a fight with a drunken Australien last night so I spent my first day here (which was amazingly dark ) in the ER of the Perth Mercy Hosptital. (irony...)

I'll get a cab now, I guess I can afford another 50 bucks or so. Wonder how much it is in their local money?

[bung79]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

lol... I'm finding all this very hilarious

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

I'll get a cab now, I guess I can afford another 50 bucks or so. Wonder how much it is in their local money?

I think it's about 6 chickens or two handfuls of shiny seashells.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

I think it's about 6 chickens or two handfuls of shiny seashells.

Thank you Sister. I think I'll go for the seashells, as an hour long drive (I think that's what it is) with six chickens in the car might be uncomfortable.

Do I make clicking sounds when I throw them at the cab driver?

I'll ignore the person that seems to make fun of my misfortunes.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Landover Baptist Church announces "Mission to Australia"

Do I make clicking sounds when I throw them at the cab driver?

I suppose it depends on the cab driver. Is he wearing a turban? If so, get out fast as he may be a terrorist!

On a more cheerful note... PRAISE! Brother Abner called (yes, they do have telephones in Australia, it turns out) and their first day has been a resounding success. One of the odd, strange things about Australia is that it's already Tuesday night there, but for normal folks it's only Tuesday morning! I thought they'd just be landing soon, but no, they've spent an entire day preaching (and waiting for Brother WO to show up).

The good news so far...
Every Bible has been distributed. All they had to do was turn their backs for a few seconds and several would disappear. When they went for lunch and came back, almost two thirds were gone!
We don't know how many have been saved by their Bibles yet, but we do know that 8 Australiens got down on their knees with our missionaries and accepted Jesus into their hearts! GLORY!

Brother WO, you can still meet up with them in Sydney as they will be there for a couple more days, or you can head for Melbourne and meet up with them and the pastors and high-level tithers if you'd like.