Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

[Bjorn Jensen]

Boys and girls, families with children, get read for some fun.

With the approval of Vladimir Putin and mayor Johny Joe Hold, the Russian traveling circus Ivanovo has officially accepted the invitation for this marvelous and hillarious new circus to perform in Freehold, Iowa on March 1, Super Tuesday, right in time for our 100th Donald Trump support rally. This circus has been widely slammed and persecuted by the God-hating liberal media, but we know they are well meaning and just wants you and your children to have fun at the expense of a stupid animal that God created for us to subdue and do whatever we want with (Genesis 1:28).

What could be a better way to show this than inviting a cirus with a stupid bear that has been beaten to sing, dance, play music instruments and other stupid tricks for our entertainment?

Watch amazing acts like:

The polar bear singing!




The polar bear playing musical instruments!



The polar bear dancing!


Ivanovo Circus are also preparing a whole new number exclusively for us with the polar bear roar to the tones of the all time classic "Jesus is a Friend of Mine" by Sonseed.

This can't be missed! Buy your tickets at mayor's office this week.

[Des]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

Mrs Denisenko is a close friend of mine, and we have shared many training tips with one another. Much of what works on bears turns out to work on wives and Asians, and vice versa.


I look forward to seeing her and that soon-to-be fireplace adorning rug again soon.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

Thank you, Brother Bjorn, for providing us with some publicity.

It is indeed an honor to host the Russians and the singing polar bear.

We're expecting an endorsement from animal rights people. The polar may go extinct unless they find some new use and place for it. What could be better than hundreds of polar bears bouncing around in trailers singing at small town events.

We're hoping for robust ticket sales.

[I Man Rastafari]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

We do not have bears in my home country which is Jamaica. Never the less we are afraid of them. It is said that a witch woman can summon up a she bear. White people are enough trouble all by themselves. I do not want to be around a white bear.

[FranklinAndPearl]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

Franklin here.

What fun this should be.


I do have one question -- does anyone know how one could go about applying for a job with this company? I have a Grandson that I have seen play a similar instrument to the Blue one in the second picture, but it involves water at the Bottom. I do not know the technical term.


He has been out of work for a while, and I will no longer be sending him any money. This would greatly help him.


Regards, Franklin

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

Thank you, Brother Bjorn, for providing us with some publicity.

It is indeed an honor to host the Russians and the singing polar bear.

We're expecting an endorsement from animal rights people. The polar may go extinct unless they find some new use and place for it. What could be better than hundreds of polar bears bouncing around in trailers singing at small town events.

We're hoping for robust ticket sales.

The animal rights crowd won't be a problem this time. I called Ivanovo and they have employed a Russian private security company with 10 heavily armed guards who will be standing around the tent, ready to take use of Freehold's local Stand Your Ground law at any moment.

They also informed me that the audience will be allowed to throw rotten eggs and tomatoes on the animals when failing to perform the tricks, so don't forget to bring that with you.

After the show, local children will be allowed to dress up and play bear-trainer for a moment and try to teach the muzzled polar bear new tricks with electric cattle prods.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

After the show, local children will be allowed to dress up and play bear-trainer for a moment and try to teach the muzzled polar bear new tricks with electric cattle prods.

I like the invovative muzzle the Russians use. It is just some inexpensive wire wrapped around the bear's mouth. Children could be given this kind of wire free at the event.

They could practice for bear training by wrapping the muzzel on their pet dog.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

You know that I'll be there.

[Basilissa]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

You know that I'll be there.

I was thinking about you reading this thread, Pastor. I'm sure that the circus will agree to part with one of their bears for the permission to perform in Freehold.

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

Indeed, a polar bear would be a great addition to the Landover Baptist church basement zoo, or Zeke's game hunting ranch.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

With the approval of Vladimir Putin and mayor Johny Joe Hold, the Russian traveling circus Ivanovo has officially accepted the invitation for this marvelous and hillarious new circus to perform in Freehold, Iowa on March 1, Super Tuesday, right in time for our 100th Donald Trump support rally.

What an excellent initiative! I assume after the show we shoot the bear for our weekly endangered species barbeque? I'll bring my 1895G as my bazooka is at The Landover Baptist Gun Store for repairs.

[Didymus Much]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

...my bazooka is at The Landover Baptist Gun Store for repairs.

Wait, you're actually letting Bobby-Joe touch that thing, let alone attempt to fix it?

You really do want to "meet Jesus" soon, huh?

[Basilissa]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

What an excellent initiative! I assume after the show we shoot the bear for our weekly endangered species barbeque? I'll bring my 1895G as my bazooka is at The Landover Baptist Gun Store for repairs.

Well, in this case we'll have to procure two she-bears: one as a gift for Pastor Ezekiel and the other one for the barbecue!

[I Man Rastafari]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

Well, in this case we'll have to procure two she-bears: one as a gift for Pastor Ezekiel and the other one for the barbecue!

I count my blessings that I do not live anywhere near Freehold if you have she bears there. Those are very dangerous and I do not want them to be around me. Sometimes they are sent by witches.

[Basilissa]

Re: Ivanovo Circus with Singing Polar Bear to perform in Freehold

I count my blessings that I do not live anywhere near Freehold if you have she bears there. Those are very dangerous and I do not want them to be around me. Sometimes they are sent by witches.

According to the Holy Bible, she-bears are Godly creatures whom God uses to do His dirty work:

2 Kings 2:23-24
23 And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head.
24 And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the Lord. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.