The Heresy Protector. Special Offer!

Ezekiel Bathfire

Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler

Join Date: Jan 2008

Posts: 22810
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#1

The Heresy Protector. Special Offer!

04-06-2017, 10:33 PM

Are you sick and tired of Catholics, Mormons, Evilutionists, Scientists, all sending different messages? All contradicting each other and then contradicting themselves? All becoming strident and loud?

Well I am, and I bet you are too!

Good News!

If you live in a State that prohibits shooting these deluded minions of Satan from spouting their bile. at last there is a solution from this torment!

The Landover Patent Heresy Protector*!

As the vile abomination starts to tell you why their delusion and lack of Moral Compass makes them right, simply slip on the Heresy Protector and your message will come across loud and clear!

"I ain't interested! Take your falsehoods elsewhere! God has heard you, but I have not!"

*(Each Heresy Protector is blessed personally by Pastor Ezekiel Flint.)

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“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Johny Joe Hold

Mayor of Freehold

Join Date: Feb 2010

Posts: 12138
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#2

04-06-2017, 11:35 PM

Re: The Heresy Protector. Special Offer!

Pastor Bathfire--Thank you for providing this information. I've been wondering lately, why does anyone need to hear heresy? It only makes life worse.

If I never hear anything a Catholic, atheist or homer has to say again I will be all the better for it. Everyone's time is better spent listening to Baptist sermons and reading the Bible.

Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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