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The Poetaster's Korner Tasteful poetry for JESUS but don't let the flowers fool you. NO HOMERS ALLOWED!

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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Excellent! Let's run with it!

Verse 3

Jesus hates the little darkies
And welfare junkies who made them
Jesus hates them through and through
So do I and so should you
Jesus hates the nigra junkies in the world


....Take it away!
I missed this too, hang on!


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post

Back to the doggeral. Pastor Zeke's hymn -- another possible verse:

Jesus loves the little children
Above all those that fathers thrash
All the bruises black and blue
Go to prove the Lord loves you
Jesus loves the little children
-- all the children fathers bash!

How do you like my solution to the "especially" problem? Pretty good, aye?
There are too many syllables in that final part, aren't there? There can't be more than 11, if we stick with the meter of the original:

Jesus loves the little children in the world


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:38 PM

Ah, folks! He's hooked.

He sees that he can salt more import into three poetic words (See Ogden Nash's citation)
than from thirty strainings of prosaic pickel barrel brines
Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
Interesting. You have aroused my interest in poetry.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
Whether I would want to put an effort into anything more than what I hope may be slightly amusing doggeral, I don't know. Good poetry seems like it would be too much like hard work, and I don't know that even if I put the work in, that I'd really come up with anything worthwhile.
You already have.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
Back to the doggeral. Pastor Zeke's hymn -- another possible verse:

Jesus loves the little children
Above all those that fathers thrash
All the bruises black and blue
Go to prove the Lord loves you
Jesus loves the little children
-- all the children fathers bash!

How do you like my solution to the "especially" problem? Pretty good, aye?
Kudos! I like that new form especially well!
See, the neat thing about this work: the scale is small.
The knotty problems always solve themselves in a bit of time.
It beats crossword puzzles a mile.

It's a lot of fun and it's great mental training.
I never wrote a thing before two years ago.
I wasted all my youth in whoring.
All I have to show for that is a wringer washer in the hallway
and a wife who takes in washing.

Poetry is my temporary-time's peek into pre-heaven,
where and when I'll surely write a golden word
or not.
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:40 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Excellent! Let's run with it!

Verse 3

Jesus hates the little darkies
And welfare junkies who made them
Jesus hates them through and through
So do I and so should you
Jesus hates the nigra junkies in the world


....Take it away!
Jesus hates the dirty homers
All the homers of the world
Homers all are an abomination
And hell will be their final station
Jesus hates the filthy homers
-- all the homers of the world!


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
There are too many syllables in that final part, aren't there? There can't be more than 11, if we stick with the meter of the original:

Jesus loves the little children in the world
Sorry, didn't realise we were doing that. I see. I'll have a look at the link, I have forgotten the original.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Poetic Peter Poetic Peter is offline
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
There are too many syllables in that final part, aren't there? There can't be more than 11, if we stick with the meter of the original:

Jesus loves the little children in the world
You're choosing a narrower lane for a rather arcane reason.
The poem can be just as biblical, without slaving to copy the Master's style.

If the content, if the message alone, does not hark to Bible scholars
your source of inspiration, well,

copying the metric style, in any result, is seen as a sort of gimmick here;
and given the -necessarily nasty form-, copying any aspect of the Biblical
style, is actually unChristian (if you think about it), because it is lampoonery.

Don't go that way or you'll look like me.

God forbid!
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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:56 PM

http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/j/e/jesloves.htm

Quote:
Jesus loves the little children,
All the children of the world.
Red and yellow, black and white,
All are precious in His sight,
Jesus loves the little children of the world.
Jesus hates the filthy homers,
All the homers of the world.
They are an abomination
With Hell their final station
Jesus hates the filthy homers of the world.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 02:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
Jesus hates the dirty homers
All the homers of the world
Homers all are an abomination
And hell will be their final station
Jesus hates the filthy homers
-- all the homers of the world!

Tsk, tsk. Not only are we a little touchy about our spelling errors but it seems we are also given to the derivative lifting of other works.

I suspect Clare H. Woolston might have a good go at you in court if still alive.


Quote:
Jesus loves the little children,
All the children of the world;
Red and yellow, black and white,
All are precious in His sight,
Jesus loves the little children of the world.





Bless you, my potential copyright infringer
Father Mo


A Cardinal in the making.

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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 03:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Maurice Lester View Post
Tsk, tsk. Not only are we a little touchy about our spelling errors but it seems we are also given to the derivative lifting of others work.

I suspect Clare H. Woolston might have a good go at you in court if she were alive.

Bless you, my potential copyright infringer
Father Mo
But since C Herbet Woolston died in 1927, his rhyme is now in the public domain. Apart from that, if you go back to where Brother Zeke started these little rhymes, we have acknowledged all along that we were rewriting his work. That would be legit even if he were alive -- as long as we make it plain what we are doing, and do not try to gain financially from it, no one is going to do take us to court.

You see it is doubtful whether a rhyme pattern can be copyrighted anyway. It could be arrived at independently, could it not? Especially a simple one.

And there is a lot more to it than that too -- we are parodying his song, so our new work is not derivative, but a work of art in its own right with its own message.

I'll leave it at that for now. It becomes very complicated. Suffice it to say that you are trying to teach your grandmother how to suck eggs.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 03:57 PM



Father,

Read it and leap
Read it and leap
Read it and leap
in the Fiery Lake

Read it and leap
oh read it and leap

Wise up take
a leap in the Lake



http://img481.imageshack.us/my.php?i...ound191pn7.swf

Last edited by Poetic Peter; 11-26-2006 at 04:16 PM. Reason: I had to think up a tune to steal
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 04:14 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
But since C Herbet Woolston died in 1927, his rhyme is now in the public domain....It becomes very complicated. Suffice it to say that you are trying to teach your grandmother how to suck eggs.

Note my use of the word potential. This was a specific choice with the intent of obviating the common point of public domain regarding the work in question. The idea being there is little originality to be found in the exercise and the likelihood of original prose coming from a gang of disgruntled Baptists, jealous of the Catholic Church and it's rich tradition of art, is slimmer than Karen Carpenter after a last visit to her vomitorium.



Bless you, my future defendant
Father Mo


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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 04:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Maurice Lester View Post
Note my use of the word potential. This was a specific choice with the intent of obviating the common point of public domain regarding the work in question. The idea being there is little originality to be found in the exercise and the likelihood of original prose coming from a gang of disgruntled Baptists, jealous of the Catholic Church and it's rich tradition of art, is slimmer than Karen Carpenter after a last visit to her vomitorium.

Bless you, my future defendant
Father Mo
You haven't read much of the thread have you?

Do you think that this has potential? It's not good I know, but with work could be improved:

THE VIOLATION OF THE ALTAR BOYS (A work in progress)

Father Mo was perspiring and his eyes were a gleam
His trousers were bulging fit to burst at the seam
The glow in his eyes was like a wolf's on the prowl
And he threw back his head and let out a great howl

For the altar boys' picnic was soon to take place
And Maurice was afire with the thrill of the chase
There'd be boys of all sizes: big thin fat and small
And Mo was determined to bugger them all


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 04:25 PM



Yo! Yo!

Father be stoned
in hail!
Oh, Mary

by the noble Enobarbus



Peter
happy

to contribute wooly content
only when it's wholly Sunday;
stuffings for the Father's cassock;

it's known he makes a right-fine hassock

Last edited by Poetic Peter; 11-26-2006 at 04:45 PM.
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Father Maurice Lester Father Maurice Lester is offline
Ring-kissing Papist dog
 

Hellbound Heathen Cancer on Society True Heterosexual™ Cathlick Five years in the service of the Enemy Condemned Aardvark Devil Evil Beastiality

 
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Location: Vatican City...where we keep the good stuff!
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Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 05:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
You haven't read much of the thread have you?
Rather astute of you to catch that!

Quote:

Do you think that this has potential? It's not good I know, but with work could be improved:

Start with the 'select all' and follow with 'delete'...or perhaps a few key word changes...allow me to suggest some.

THE VIOLATION OF THE WOOLY BOYS (A work in progress)

Crusty Eno was perspiring and his eyes were a gleam
His trousers were bulging fit to burst at the seam
The glow in his eyes was like a wolf's on the prowl
And he threw back his head and let out a great howl

For the ram and ewe picnic was soon to take place
Enorbarbus was afire with the thrill of the chase
There'd be sheep of all sizes: big thin fat and small
Eno was determined to bugger them all.



Bless you, my abuser of virgin wool
Father Mo


A Cardinal in the making.

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Poetic Peter Poetic Peter is offline
Christian Poet Emeritus
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True Heterosexual™ Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture

 
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Poetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-26-2006, 05:41 PM



Father, this is Tailor Pee-Wee
Peter caught up in your fabric.
Raveled? It is not.

Once a thread begins a run
by God, dear Father
Threadbare Rue--
you show the whole

poet you are not, not yet.

So Keep On Plugging always

in the decent way
of course.

Last edited by Poetic Peter; 11-26-2006 at 05:58 PM.
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Ixi Ixi is offline
Wretched Unsaved Goth
Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: The landover baptists are truly quite mad - 11-27-2006, 05:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE A HUNDRED WARNING POINTS?
Will they be shiny?


A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
Professor of English Landover University
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Real American™ Saved 5 Years Ribfest '04 Gold Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Real American™ Mission to Australia Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian

 
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Location: Ministering to the Liebral Godless of New Zealand
Enobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-27-2006, 08:14 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Maurice Lester View Post
Rather astute of you to catch that!




Start with the 'select all' and follow with 'delete'...or perhaps a few key word changes...allow me to suggest some.

THE VIOLATION OF THE WOOLY BOYS (A work in progress)

Crusty Eno was perspiring and his eyes were a gleam
His trousers were bulging fit to burst at the seam
The glow in his eyes was like a wolf's on the prowl
And he threw back his head and let out a great howl

For the ram and ewe picnic was soon to take place
Enorbarbus was afire with the thrill of the chase
There'd be sheep of all sizes: big thin fat and small
Eno was determined to bugger them all.



Bless you, my abuser of virgin wool
Father Mo
Now that definitely is copyright infringment and plagiarism -- you have lifted most of my words verbatim. My lawyer says you are certainly guilty but is suggesting we wait a few months so I am in a better position to prove loss of earnings and go for a bigger claim. I'll get back to you about this if you don't hear from my lawyer personally.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Poetic Peter Poetic Peter is offline
Christian Poet Emeritus
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True Heterosexual™ Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture

 
Posts: 1,694
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Poetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RapturePoetic Peter has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: The Poetasters' Korner - 11-27-2006, 09:49 PM


"pwnd"
again by the noble GODLY Enobarbus


____________




+To Father Mo-

In a former era,
you can bet your bottom buck,
that I was a vara
persistent vision known as Puck.



PS Farther,
no, I am not Eno's Roadie.
I'm only playing Holy Toady

Last edited by Poetic Peter; 11-27-2006 at 10:03 PM.
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