X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 17
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 17 template Next
  • #91
    Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

    Originally posted by empacae View Post
    I am most pleased about this as I haven't filed or paid my taxes in the last 11 years.
    I used to pay taxes but when I accidentally shot an inspector of taxes they stopped bothering me.
    5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
    To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
    James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

    Comment

    • #92
      Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

      Originally posted by Aristotle View Post
      Do you think it wise to talk about Habakkuk in open forum?
      Shhh...the walls have ears!

      Comment

      • #93
        Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

        Originally posted by Rev. Jim Osborne View Post
        While the public at our church is aware there is a Project Habakkuk going on, the details of said project are remaining secret, for now. To be on the safe side, I would limit references to the Project, and surely do not elaborate further on the workings.

        SJ-74 was a disaster because someone had loose lips. I think you realize how important it is to keep mum about this whole affair. Are we on the same page, brother?
        Wait, nobody told me about SJ-74...

        What's going on here?!

        Comment

        • #94
          Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

          Originally posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
          Wait, nobody told me about SJ-74...

          What's going on here?!
          Nothing, Brother, nothing to worry about.
          Sweet Lord Jesus,
          I want to pray for those who persecute me, my Lord.
          Please, treat their children as you treated those of Egypt, when they upset you! (Psalm 135:8-9)
          Dash their little children against the stones for their fathers iniquity! (Psalm 137:8-9)
          Hit them on the cheek, and smash out their teeth! (Psalm 3:7)
          Make their death and descent into Hell swift and terrible! (Psalm 55:15)
          Scatter their broken bodies over the streets of their evil cities, like Benghazi, Amsterdam, Tokyo and Mecca! (Psalm 110:6)
          Praised be Your Glorious Name™.

          Amen.

          Comment

          • #95
            Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

            Originally posted by Mike Gerrard View Post
            Come march fifth I will laugh whole-heartedly and will be sure to return here and let you know of my enjoyment.
            Well, its even better than that. You probably do not realize that one of the most specific predictions is that unbelievers would mock the Second Coming in a manner not unlike the mockery directed at Noah just before the flood came:


            2Peter 3:3-4 ... knowing this first: that scoffers will come in the last days, walking according to their own lusts, and saying, “Where is the promise of His coming? For since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of creation.”


            So, ironically, your mockery is a fulfillment of Apostolic prophecy and an early herald of the Second Coming. Hmmm...

            Comment

            • #96
              Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
              Your laughter will soon turn to screams of agony, once you realize that March 5, 2010 will mark your first day in hellfire.
              Amen. Every day that passes is bringing us closer to the end!

              Comment

              • #97
                Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                Originally posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
                Amen. Every day that passes is bringing us closer to the end!
                Indeed. I'm counting down the days on my wall calendar:
                Sweet Lord Jesus,
                I want to pray for those who persecute me, my Lord.
                Please, treat their children as you treated those of Egypt, when they upset you! (Psalm 135:8-9)
                Dash their little children against the stones for their fathers iniquity! (Psalm 137:8-9)
                Hit them on the cheek, and smash out their teeth! (Psalm 3:7)
                Make their death and descent into Hell swift and terrible! (Psalm 55:15)
                Scatter their broken bodies over the streets of their evil cities, like Benghazi, Amsterdam, Tokyo and Mecca! (Psalm 110:6)
                Praised be Your Glorious Name™.

                Amen.

                Comment

                • #98
                  Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                  Originally posted by GOD=life View Post
                  Since you're so sure, would you like to bet money on that?
                  Notice he's disappeared now? Guess he couldn't put his money where his mouth was.

                  Comment

                  • #99
                    Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                    Originally posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
                    Notice he's disappeared now? Guess he couldn't put his money where his mouth was.
                    Yeah, I noticed. That was kind of the point of my "bet": it's easy to talk the talk, but not so easy to walk the walk.

                    That's something True Christians™ deal with every day. In fact, we get persecuted for walking the walk. Oh well, we'll have the last laugh very soon. But this will be a humble laugh, more like "ho-hum", because we do wish and pray for everyone to reconsider and turn to God after all.
                    I take my orders from Jesus H. Christ, supernatural born US citizen

                    Be wary of false Kumbaya Christians who use a highlighter and scissors to read the Bible. God wants us to read the lines, not between the lines. False Christians will go to Hell:
                    Matthew 7:22                     Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
                    Matthew 7:23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

                    Asking a Christian to prove God exists is like asking him to prove his phone rings because yours doesn't. Make that call yourself! Dial 0800-get-on-your-knees-and-pray.

                    Comment

                    • #100
                      Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                      Originally posted by Mike Gerrard View Post
                      Oh yes...

                      I will bet you every single cent to my name. Ill even take it 25-1.
                      I'd be amazed if this clown actually had a single cent to his name.

                      Comment

                      • #101
                        Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                        Originally posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
                        I will take that bet for $2500-$100. Since if we are right, and we are right, we will not be able to collect our money I have the following proposal. You pay me your $2500 immediately. I will of course donate it to the Church. If you win, which will not happen of course, you can come to my house march 5th to collect your $100 winnings. It's best to come around 5 pm right before I go hunting.

                        1 Timothy 6:10 "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows."
                        Did he end up coming, brother?

                        Comment

                        • #102
                          Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                          Originally posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
                          Did he end up coming, brother?
                          No, he turned out to be all bragging and no substance.
                          5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
                          To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
                          James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

                          Comment

                          • #103
                            Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                            Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
                            It is an attempt to show the heathen his folly.
                            Amen, time is running out!

                            Comment

                            • #104
                              Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                              Originally posted by GOD=life View Post
                              Mr. Hutchins is absolutely right. The world will end on March 4th. It's not a matter of gambling.

                              I have no interest in receiving money. After all, I'm only a month away from going to Heaven.

                              It's a metaphorical comparison to the gambling that people do with their souls: when their world ends (through death), they will see how their "gamble" paid off.
                              So everyone, how do you all plan to spend your last few days here on planet earth?

                              Comment

                              • #105
                                Re: WARNING!!! The world is going to end on March 4, 2010!

                                Originally posted by True Disciple View Post
                                Then God has apparently changed His mind
                                If you Truely believe that God is Omnipotent (which is what it says in the bible, as well as in the Koran, as well as in the Torah) then i think you know that God does not change His mind.

                                Comment

                                Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 17 template Next
                                Working...
                                X