[Jim Farmer]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

How do you know Adam and Eve were not black?
You ever try to take a rib from a nigra?

[Roland]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

How do you know Adam and Eve were not black?
You ever try to take a rib from a nigra?

??? I don´t understand the joke. My colleague from the Nederlandse Antillen has a smoker and sometimes he will put a large plate of really nice slowly smoked ribs for all to take and enjoy. And this guy is quite dark, and not from the smoke.

[The atheist bastard]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What's the difference between acne and a priest?












Acne waits until a boy's 14 to come on his face!

[VictoryOS]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What's the difference between acne and a priest?












Acne waits until a boy's 14 to come on his face!

I don't get it.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

A Pastor I know from Alabama sent me this hilarious photo. I had to look up what a "Jenga" was, and then I chortled.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

The local Baptist church realised that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer.

So a Pastor made an appointment to see the lawyer in his lavish office.

The pastor opened the meeting by saying, "Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a cent to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community through the church?"

The lawyer thought for a moment and said, "First, did your research also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?"

Embarrassed, the pastor mumbled, "Uh... No, I didn't know that."

"Secondly," says the lawyer, "did it show that my brother, a disabled Veteran, is blind, confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six children?"

The stricken volunteer began to stammer an apology, but was cut off again.

"Thirdly, "the lawyer said, "did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in a dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and the burden of supporting three
children, one of whom is disabled and another who has learning disabilities requiring an array of
private tutors?"

Completely beaten, the humiliated pastor said, "I'm so sorry. I had no idea."

And then the lawyer said, "So, if I don't give any money to them, what makes you think I'd give any to you?"

__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ___

The moral here is not to try to get money out of lawyers, keep squeezing the stone and sell the blood.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

A Jew goes to the synagogue and prays. “Lord, O Lord! Things are bad, my wife is ill and the drugs costs so much; I owe money to the city, and my business needs money to survive. I have been a good Jew and asked nothing of you before, this time, O Lord, let me win the lottery.”

He goes home, but nothing happens. The next Saturday, the old Jew is there again and falls to his knees: ““Lord, O Lord! Please help me!... Please! I have no money, my wife is worse; my creditors are threatening me with bankruptcy. Some guys from the city came round – I have very little time to pay them. And now the heating has broken down… A win on the lottery is all I ask.”

He goes home, but nothing happens. The next Saturday, the old Jew is back at the synagogue. This time he prostrates himself on the floor, his eyes running with tears: “Lord, O Lord! Please help me!... Please! I am begging you. Only you can help. There are only a few days left. My business will be gone, my wife will die, I will be alone in the world.” His words start to fail as emotion takes over, “Hear me, Lord… not for me… for my wife of 45 years… let me win the lottery…”

At this, there is the sound of a wind in the synagogue, it becomes louder and louder and a white light starts to fill the building. The old Jew, still staring at the carpet, raises his eyes – the light is blinding, the wind is deafening and then suddenly the wind stops and, in the silence and from above, a deep and sonorous voice speaks.

“Abe. Abe, my child, I hear you, I hear you. Meet Me halfway… buy a ticket.”

[gerardwayruinedme]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Ooh, I know a good one!

What's the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits until a boys thirteen to come on his face.

[VictoryOS]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Ooh, I know a good one!

What's the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits until a boys thirteen to come on his face.

I still don't get it.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Ooh, I know a good one!

What's the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits until a boys thirteen to come on his face.

Dear Sinner,

I've seen many lecherous things in my youth and I do understand the fornicatory nature of this joke. I was initially hopeless regarding your position in the axis of hell-Salvation but now I can see a glimmer of healthy doctrine in your not-yet-totally-black Soul.

We agree. Catholic priests are a repulsive swarm of abusers. We have a whole sub-Forum dedicated to exposing their vile practices to the World. I am so happy that you share this view. You have now the privilege of being in my Prayer List.

Ephesians 1:18
The eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints,


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

What's the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits until a boys thirteen to come on his face.

I still don't get it.

That's probably because the joke doesn't really fall into the category Good, Clean Christian Jokes.

OTOH we can't expect abusive priests to come clean.

[Trent Harvey, Jr.]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

So a Muslim walks into a gay bar

The bartender asks "what will you have?"

The Muslim replies "50 shots please"

[TayLuvsJ]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I have a joke











Atheists

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

In fact, atheists are a rather serious matter.