[James Hutchins]

Re: Manly Jokes

Here is one my daddy used to tell before secular law gave him the needle.

Whats's the best thing about women

(.....followed by absolute silence)

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Manly Jokes

Mr. Etheldreda told the boys this joke:

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing you haven't told her twice already.

[Didymus Much]

Re: Manly Jokes

What do you say to a Chinese knight?

"There's a chink in your armour".

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Manly Jokes

One night, two Eskimos are sitting in a bar in northern Alaska, when they are accosted by a young man from the Mainland. The fellow has obviously been drinking. He slurs, "Hey, ya know, I've always admired you Eskimos. I REEAAALLLY like Eskimos. I've ALWAYS WANTED to be an Eskimo. Tell me how ta BE an Eskimo, huh?"

The Eskimos wink at each other. One tells the guy, "Okay, to become an Eskimo, there are only three things that you have to do. First, you've got to drink a whole bottle of Yukon Jack at once, then you've got to kill a polar bear with your bare hands, and, finally, you have to make love to an Eskimo woman."

The guy takes this in. He ticks off three fingers to himself. Then he heads over to the bar, and orders a bottle of Yukon Jack. Already drunk, he drinks the whole thing down. This has a bad effect on his balance. The fellow staggers out of the bar, muttering something like "Polar bear, Polar bear..."

Several hours pass.

Finally, the door to the bar opens, and the drunk is back. He looks a fright. His parka is ripped, one of his arms is dangling at a crazy angle, and he's got blood all over his face. He staggers over to the Eskimos, and says, "ALL right. I've got the Yukon Jack. I've got the polar bear. Now WHERE'S THIS ESKIMO BITCH I'VE GOTTA KILL?"

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Manly Jokes

Teacher : If you have 10 cup cakes and someone asks for 2, how many do you have left?

Little Rastus: 10

Teacher: OK. Well what if somebody forcibly takes 2 of the cakes, what would you have then?

Little Rastus: 10 and a dead body.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Manly Jokes

A man met a beautiful lady and he decided that he wanted to marry her right away. She said, "But we don't know anything about each other." He said, "That's alright. We'll learn about each other as we go along."

She consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. One morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the ten-meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer. This was followed by three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife.

After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel. She said, "That was incredible!" He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."

She got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps, she climbed back out and lay down on her towel hardly out of breath.

He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?" No," she said. "I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal."

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Manly Jokes

A professor told dirty jokes in class and the women wanted to protest it. So they decided that in the next time that the professor will start with these kind of jokes they all will leave the class as a protest.

Somehow the professor heard about the plan.

In the next lecture, in the beginning of the lecture he said: "In Sweden a prostitute makes $2000 per night."

All the women stood up and started to leave the class. So he shouted after them: "Where are you going? The plane to Sweden doesn't take off until the day after tomorrow."

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Manly Jokes

Lol. This is the 21st century. Men and women are equal, homosexuality is fine and people are people no matter what their skin color is. Suck my *offensive vitriol deleted*. Everybody hates you guys.

Can we please move past the hatred, the majoritarianism, the profanity, and the political agendas, and move on to something more wholesome and family friendly, like Jesus?

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Manly Jokes

Lol. This is the 21st century. Men and women are equal, homosexuality is fine and people are people no matter what their skin color is. Suck my *offensive vitriol deleted*. Everybody hates you guys.

Please stay on topic.

YIC

[Miss Whoremonger]

Re: Manly Jokes

Lol. This is the 21st century. Men and women are equal, homosexuality is fine and people are people no matter what their skin color is. Suck my *offensive vitriol deleted*. Everybody hates you guys.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Manly Jokes

Three blondes died and found themselves standing before Saint Peter at the gate to heaven. Peter said to them, "Before you may enter the gates of Heaven you have to tell me what Easter is."

The first blonde said, "Easter is a holiday where we all have a big feast and we're thankful." St. Peter said, "NO!" and banished her to Hell.

The second blonde said, "Easter is a holiday where we celebrate Jesus' birth and give each other presents." St. Peter said, "NO!" and banished her to Hell.

The third blonde said, "I know what Easter is." Peter said, "Okay then, tell me."

She starts, "Easter is Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with his disciples when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested him. The Romans hung him on the cross where he died. Then they buried him in a tomb behind a large boulder."

St. Peter said, "Very good!" The blonde interrupted and added, "Every year the Jews role away the boulder and Jesus comes out. If he sees his shadow we have six more weeks of winter."

[Witch Hammer]

Re: Manly Jokes

A nigra walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. "Hey, thats a fine animal you have there, where'd you get it?", asks the barkeeper. "Africa", says the parrot.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Manly Jokes

What do you call two queers named Bob?


Oral Roberts.

[Seth Campbell]

Re: Manly Jokes

DID DYOU KNOW Young Zuse is ananagram fro Zone Guy Us? AND Azhalerazuse is ananagarm for Ales Are Huzza

AHEM!

MEN ONLY! Go play with the other kids.

[Witch Hammer]

Re: Manly Jokes

A man suffering through the advanced stages of leprosy decides to treat himself to supper at an elegant restaurant...halfway through his meal he notices that people around him are vomiting and passing out. The leper calls to the waiter and says, "l can see that my condition is upsetting the other patrons...if you will bring me my check please, I'll gladly leave."

"No, not at all sir," smiles the waiter, "the culprit has already been ejected...he was sitting behind you, dipping his bread in the back of your neck!!