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  • Guodlike
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Oct 2016
    • 14

    #1

    'ello boys

    I'm a Buddhist who's just here for the entertainment. I do not wish to interrupt with any heated discussions and will try to maintain a low profile as not to create any disruptions

    I was lead here when I saw a video on YouTube called "DO NOT PLAY TF2" and that's how I ended up here. I find the threads here interesting and intend to stay as I have cancelled my NetFlix subscription recently so this will be it's replacement


    That's all for now, until the next juicy post
  • Guodlike
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Oct 2016
    • 14

    #2
    Re: 'ello boys

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel
    Hello, Chinaman! Welcome to God's favorite forum. Do you go around in an orange bedsheet begging for rice and fried dirt? As you have no use for money, you might consider donating it to Jesus when He casts you into darkness with the Lake of Fire.

    If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

    If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

    You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

    Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
    Thank you pastor for your warm welcome! Fortunately, I don't have an orange blanket and do not beg for rice and fried dirt as I have embraced a rather Western lifestyle. As for money, I would like to hold onto it for future purposes


    I will keep a respectful tongue as to not cause any trouble


    If there's any drama, I'll be here lurking in the shadows

    Comment

    • handmaiden
      Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
      True Christian™
      • May 2010
      • 11438

      #3
      Re: 'ello boys

      Originally posted by Guodlike View Post
      I'm a Buddhist who's just here for the entertainment. I do not wish to interrupt with any heated discussions and will try to maintain a low profile as not to create any disruptions

      I was lead here when I saw a video on YouTube called "DO NOT PLAY TF2" and that's how I ended up here. I find the threads here interesting and intend to stay as I have cancelled my NetFlix subscription recently so this will be it's replacement




      That's all for now, until the next juicy post

      Hi, there. Let me point out to you that we are not here for your entertainment. We are here to show the world what the Bible really says and what it means to obey its every command.


      So much trouble has been caused in this world by people who pick through the Bible for verses that reflect their points of view and personal agendas. We work hard to open people's minds to the Truth™ about the Bible.


      If people followed the Bible as carefully as we do here at Landover Baptist Church, it would be a much better world.


      So, please feel free to read the Bible and learn and possibly comment. If you conduct yourself with common courtesy and remember the purpose behind our discussions, you may find yourself Saved® one day.


      Until then, you will be regarded with some suspicion, but that's because we get a lot of people here talking about how wrong we are and telling us to do anatomically impossible things to ourselves. A good 65 % of those people screech at us that God is love and that they love God while simultaneously telling us to do the aforementioned anatomically impossible things. "Entertaining" is not the word that I would use to describe it.


      In the meantime, here's a "juicy post":


      1 Peter 5: 8-9
      Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.



      Steadfastly Yours,


      Handmaiden
      His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

      Guns For God and the Economy

      Comment

      • Guodlike
        Unsaved trash
        Under Investigation
        • Oct 2016
        • 14

        #4
        Re: 'ello boys

        Originally posted by handmaiden View Post
        Hi, there. Let me point out to you that we are not here for your entertainment. We are here to show the world what the Bible really says and what it means to obey its every command.


        So much trouble has been caused in this world by people who pick through the Bible for verses that reflect their points of view and personal agendas. We work hard to open people's minds to the Truth™ about the Bible.


        If people followed the Bible as carefully as we do here at Landover Baptist Church, it would be a much better world.


        So, please feel free to read the Bible and learn and possibly comment. If you conduct yourself with common courtesy and remember the purpose behind our discussions, you may find yourself Saved® one day.


        Until then, you will be regarded with some suspicion, but that's because we get a lot of people here talking about wrong we are and telling us to do anatomically impossible things to ourselves. A good 65 % of those people tell us that God is love and that they love God while simultaneously telling us to do the aforementioned anatomically impossible things. "Entertaining" is not the word that I would use to describe it.


        In the meantime, here's a "juicy post":


        1 Peter 5: 8-9
        Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.



        Steadfastly Yours,


        Handmaiden
        Hi handmaiden, I understand your message. In fact, I actually attend a Christian school in Malaysia called Wesley Methodist School Kuala Lumpur (International). I do take part in Bible Knowledge classes as it is compulsory for every student (except Muslims, cuz Malaysia's a Muslim country, yeah).


        I do read the Bible as I find the stories interesting, but mainly because I'm bored. I do not have any plans on being "Saved®" at the moment but I may change my mind later on. As for now, I'm here for the drama.


        And thank you for your "juicy post", it was indeed juicy and full of meaning

        Comment

        • handmaiden
          Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
          True Christian™
          • May 2010
          • 11438

          #5
          Re: 'ello boys

          Originally posted by Guodlike View Post
          Hi handmaiden, I understand your message. In fact, I actually attend a Christian school in Malaysia called Wesley Methodist School Kuala Lumpur (International). I do take part in Bible Knowledge classes as it is compulsory for every student (except Muslims, cuz Malaysia's a Muslim country, yeah).


          I do read the Bible as I find the stories interesting, but mainly because I'm bored. I do not have any plans on being "Saved®" at the moment but I may change my mind later on. As for now, I'm here for the drama.


          And thank you for your "juicy post", it was indeed juicy and full of meaning

          You do know that you're breaking Jesus's heart, don't you? Is that the sort of drama you're looking for? Hell is pretty dramatic. But I'm sure that you don't want to burn in Hell for eternity. You need to get Saved(r) and the sooner the better.


          Read the Bible, know that if you obey its every word, you won't have to worry about going to Hell.


          Deuteronomy 32:2
          My doctrine shall drop as the rain, my speech shall distil as the dew, as the small rain upon the tender herb, and as the showers upon the grass:



          Exhortingly Yours,
          Handmaiden
          His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

          Guns For God and the Economy

          Comment

          • Guodlike
            Unsaved trash
            Under Investigation
            • Oct 2016
            • 14

            #6
            Re: 'ello boys

            Originally posted by handmaiden View Post
            You do know that you're breaking Jesus's heart, don't you? Is that the sort of drama you're looking for? Hell is pretty dramatic. But I'm sure that you don't want to burn in Hell for eternity. You need to get Saved® and the sooner the better.


            Read the Bible, know that if you obey its every word, you won't have to worry about going to Hell.


            Deuteronomy 32:2
            My doctrine shall drop as the rain, my speech shall distil as the dew, as the small rain upon the tender herb, and as the showers upon the grass:



            Exhortingly Yours,
            Handmaiden
            Handmaiden,


            I do understand. However, I feel that Christianity is not the right choice for me yet. Although I am recognized as a Buddhist, I am what you people call "Atheist Scum" unfortunately.


            As for drama, I'm pretty sure you know what drama I'm talking about, not Hell.


            I do not wish to create any harm, nor do I wish to offend any of your beliefs, just pretend that I was never here


            Peace out,
            Guodlike

            Comment

            • Brentin
              Forum Member
              Forum Member
              • Sep 2016
              • 48

              #7
              Re: 'ello boys

              Welcome Tentatively to God's Favorite Forum! You have been told of the perils of your current ways which condemns you to a Eternal Damnation.

              Revelation 21:8


              However, till than I will add you to my prayer list. And God's word promises his word will not return void. Praise God!

              Isaiah 55:11

              Comment

              • Guodlike
                Unsaved trash
                Under Investigation
                • Oct 2016
                • 14

                #8
                Re: 'ello boys

                Originally posted by Brentin View Post
                Welcome Tentatively to God's Favorite Forum! You have been told of the perils of your current ways which condemns you to a Eternal Damnation.

                Revelation 21:8


                However, till than I will add you to my prayer list. And God's word promises his word will not return void. Praise God!

                Isaiah 55:11
                Thank you for the welcome, and thank you for adding me to your prayer list

                Comment

                • Faith_Machine
                  Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
                  True Christian™
                  • Mar 2011
                  • 10050

                  #9
                  Re: 'ello boys

                  Why are you here? And why is your introduction titled "'ello boys"? Are you a queer?
                  WARNING:
                  In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                  REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                  Comment

                  • Guodlike
                    Unsaved trash
                    Under Investigation
                    • Oct 2016
                    • 14

                    #10
                    Re: 'ello boys

                    Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                    Why are you here? And why is your introduction titled "'ello boys"? Are you a queer?
                    Aren't we all queer in our own special way?

                    BTW nice smilies, really cool

                    Comment

                    • Guodlike
                      Unsaved trash
                      Under Investigation
                      • Oct 2016
                      • 14

                      #11
                      Re: 'ello boys

                      Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                      Why are you here? And why is your introduction titled "'ello boys"? Are you a queer?
                      Already stated in the first post my friend

                      Comment

                      • Harsha Shah
                        Curry slurping demon
                         
                        • Aug 2014
                        • 321

                        #12
                        Re: 'ello boys

                        Originally posted by Guodlike View Post
                        I'm a Buddhist who's just here for the entertainment. I do not wish to interrupt with any heated discussions and will try to maintain a low profile as not to create any disruptions

                        I was lead here when I saw a video on YouTube called "DO NOT PLAY TF2" and that's how I ended up here. I find the threads here interesting and intend to stay as I have cancelled my NetFlix subscription recently so this will be it's replacement

                        That's all for now, until the next juicy post
                        Yes, Mr. Guod, I am Harsha Shah and I am answering you. Yes. My ancestors also came from Asia but from the Indian subcontinent, yes. I am very glad to find antoher person here who is practising an oriental religion. Yes. I am afraid that I am quite secular nowadays but I was being raised a Jainist. Yes.

                        Yes, do you also as a Buddhist follow the ahimsa and the vegetarianism? Are you a Hinayana or Theravada Buddhist?

                        Yes. I am finding the people over here very welcoming, especially Mr. Machine, and it has been very interesting to discuss religion with them. Yes. Are you familiar with the story of the blind men and the elephant? Some of the men are feeling the trunk and taking it as a hose; some are touching the legs for colums; and maybe someone is grasping the lingam and I don't dare think what he might be thinking about. Yes. Are we all seeing different aspects of the elephant, but what is the elephant thinking of us? Yes?

                        I am hoping that I am not offending you but if I am, I do not mind if you will just be neglecting my post. Yes.
                        "Ecclesiastes 3:7
                        A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."
                        Yes. Women are saving lives. It is time we are speaking! Yes!

                        Comment

                        • Guodlike
                          Unsaved trash
                          Under Investigation
                          • Oct 2016
                          • 14

                          #13
                          Re: 'ello boys

                          Originally posted by Harsha Shah View Post
                          Yes, Mr. Guod, I am Harsha Shah and I am answering you. Yes. My ancestors also came from Asia but from the Indian subcontinent, yes. I am very glad to find antoher person here who is practising an oriental religion. Yes. I am afraid that I am quite secular nowadays but I was being raised a Jainist. Yes.

                          Yes, do you also as a Buddhist follow the ahimsa and the vegetarianism? Are you a Hinayana or Theravada Buddhist?

                          Yes. I am finding the people over here very welcoming, especially Mr. Machine, and it has been very interesting to discuss religion with them. Yes. Are you familiar with the story of the blind men and the elephant? Some of the men are feeling the trunk and taking it as a hose; some are touching the legs for colums; and maybe someone is grasping the lingam and I don't dare think what he might be thinking about. Yes. Are we all seeing different aspects of the elephant, but what is the elephant thinking of us? Yes?

                          I am hoping that I am not offending you but if I am, I do not mind if you will just be neglecting my post. Yes.
                          Hello Harsha, yes the people here are very welcoming. I do not practice vegetarianism nor ahimsa but I do practice the good values Buddhism promotes.


                          Yes Mr Machine is a rather interesting person, I've read some of his posts and find his discussions very intriguing. And yes, I am familiar with the story. It is true that we live in a world where our knowledge is so vast yet so limited and that we see the world from different aspects.


                          Do not worry, you're not being offensive in anyway. But my name is actually Guo, not Guod I am of Chinese descent and my mother is kind of interested in Tibetan Buddhism.


                          I look forward to more posts in the future

                          Comment

                          • Harsha Shah
                            Curry slurping demon
                             
                            • Aug 2014
                            • 321

                            #14
                            Re: 'ello boys

                            Originally posted by Guodlike View Post
                            Hello Harsha, yes the people here are very welcoming. I do not practice vegetarianism nor ahimsa but I do practice the good values Buddhism promotes.

                            Yes Mr Machine is a rather interesting person, I've read some of his posts and find his discussions very intriguing. And yes, I am familiar with the story. It is true that we live in a world where our knowledge is so vast yet so limited and that we see the world from different aspects.

                            Do not worry, you're not being offensive in anyway. But my name is actually Guo, not Guod I am of Chinese descent and my mother is kind of interested in Tibetan Buddhism.

                            I look forward to more posts in the future
                            Yes, Mr. Guo. It is Harsha Shah here again. Yes. I am very interested in this as most of the people over here are practiscing christianity. Yes. I think that I might be offending you but perhaps you would be willing to tell more about the values that you are promoting. Yes. Are you referring to the five precepts of not killing, not stealing, not indulging in sexuality, not lying and not taking intoxicants? These are things that we are also sharing in Jainism. Yes. I must be telling you that I have sometimes been indulging in some intoxicating beverages. That is bad karma, eh?

                            Yes. I am also hoping to be discussing these things further with you. Yes.
                            "Ecclesiastes 3:7
                            A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."
                            Yes. Women are saving lives. It is time we are speaking! Yes!

                            Comment

                            • Basilissa
                              South of the Border outreach program
                              True Christian™
                               
                              • Mar 2013
                              • 12978

                              #15
                              Re: 'ello boys

                              Hello Mr. Guod and to our Godly forum!!!

                              Originally posted by Guodlike View Post
                              Hi handmaiden, I understand your message. In fact, I actually attend a Christian school in Malaysia called Wesley Methodist School Kuala Lumpur (International). I do take part in Bible Knowledge classes as it is compulsory for every student (except Muslims, cuz Malaysia's a Muslim country, yeah).
                              This is definitely a step in the right direction, even though Methodists are false Christians who will burn in Hell for eternity for not following the Bible.


                              I do read the Bible as I find the stories interesting, but mainly because I'm bored.
                              You really should pay more attention to it, dear. This book is responsible for many more genocides that Mein Kampf, so its importance for the human history is really crucial.

                              I do not have any plans on being "Saved®" at the moment but I may change my mind later on.
                              I will pray for you.
                              God created fossils to test our faith.

                              * * *

                              My favorite LBC sermons:
                              True Christians are Perfect!
                              True Christian™ Love.
                              Salvation™ made Easy!
                              You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
                              Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
                              Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
                              Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
                              Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
                              The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
                              Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
                              God HATES Rational Thinking!
                              True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

                              Comment

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