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  • Levi Jones
    Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
    Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
    Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
     
    • Jul 2009
    • 13930

    #16
    Re: Oops...

    Well, color me shocked! He made that story up?!
    Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

    Comment

    • Nobar King
      Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
      Christ's Guardian
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2007
      • 23748

      #17
      Re: Oops...

      Originally posted by Vascilios View Post
      You see, I made up the story about the testes and everything. In fact, every post I have ever made on here was a lie.

      I am an atheist, and I just wanted a little fun, and, that is what I got. I will print out all of these converstations that I have had and show them to my friends and we will get a kick out of it.
      You think you're the first atheist to try to punk Jesus? No one believed your stupid story about your nuts. We were just playing along with you to see what kind of stupid stories you can make up to try to offend Jesus.

      Lying is a sin, and God knows when you lie. Are you too embarrassed about your pitiful life to just be yourself?
      May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

      Comment

      • Pastor Isaac Peters
        Senior Pastor
        Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
        Always Biblically correct
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2006
        • 10639

        #18
        Re: Oops...

        Since you're an admitted liar, why exactly should we pay attention to anything in your little rant?
        This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

        Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

        sigpic

        Comment

        • Bob4God
          Moderator
          Arms Dealer for CHRIST
          Hands folded for Jesus
           
          • Apr 2008
          • 5274

          #19
          Re: Oops...

          Typical atheist thinks NOTHING of telling lies.

          GOD sure wasn't kidding when He said there are none that do good!
          sigpic
          The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
          - Proverbs 15:3

          CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


          CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


          Comment

          • Ezekiel Bathfire
            Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
            Christ's Rottweiler
             
            • Jan 2008
            • 22931

            #20
            Re: Oops...

            Originally posted by Vascilios View Post
            [...]Let us pray... Our Father who art in Heaven, please forgive them for their arrogance in condemning one of their brothers to eternal damnnation, [...]
            "They" have not condemned anyone. "They" know that this is God's job (you apparently do not.)

            If you can find fault with the very Word of The Lord Almighty, please share it with us.
            sigpic


            “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

            Author of such illuminating essays as,
            Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

            Comment

            • Luci Mourningstar
              True Christian™
              True Christian™
              • Dec 2009
              • 247

              #21
              Re: Oops...

              Originally posted by Vascilios View Post
              Thank you very much, though. You have given me exactly what I wanted. You see, I made up the story about the testes and everything. In fact, every post I have ever made on here was a lie.

              I am an atheist, and I just wanted a little fun, and, that is what I got. I will print out all of these conversations that I have had and show them to my friends and we will get a kick out of it.
              And here I spent a good day of my day on my knees praying for God to restore your testicles
              sigpic

              God loves me so much
              that he killed his only son so I can live forever.


              Comment

              • James Hutchins
                True Christian™
                Just a Regular Nice Guy
                 
                • Jun 2009
                • 29457

                #22
                Re: Oops...

                I hope he enjoys his short laugh here on Earth. We will get the last laugh (along with our best friend, Jesus) when this heathen finds himself flung into the fires of brimstone with respite only long enough for the Devil himself to sodomize this stupid fellow with his barbed talleywacker.
                Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                Comment

                • True Disciple
                  True Christian™ Creation Scientist
                  Landover Baptist University Associate Professor
                  Smashing atheist science one fact at a time
                  True Christian™
                  • Nov 2009
                  • 2445

                  #23
                  Re: Oops...

                  For some reason, every time someone talks about having suffered damage in the pubic regions, it turns out that he is an atheist liar. Remember Rabbi Finklestein? What is it that makes atheists want us to pray for their privates? Do they get sexually aroused by such a thing?
                  Sweet Lord Jesus,
                  I want to pray for those who persecute me, my Lord.
                  Please, treat their children as you treated those of Egypt, when they upset you! (Psalm 135:8-9)
                  Dash their little children against the stones for their fathers iniquity! (Psalm 137:8-9)
                  Hit them on the cheek, and smash out their teeth! (Psalm 3:7)
                  Make their death and descent into Hell swift and terrible! (Psalm 55:15)
                  Scatter their broken bodies over the streets of their evil cities, like Benghazi, Amsterdam, Tokyo and Mecca! (Psalm 110:6)
                  Praised be Your Glorious Name™.

                  Amen.

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 78556

                    #24
                    Re: Oops...

                    Psalm 14:1 The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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