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  • #76
    Re: Raven seeks redemption

    Your body is going through a lot of changes on a week-to-week basis, and it's important that we be able to remotely pray over you and make sure there are no tell-tale visual signs that demons have gotten in there with your little bundle of joy.
    WARNING:
    In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
    REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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    • #77
      Re: Raven seeks redemption

      Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
      Your body is going through a lot of changes on a week-to-week basis, and it's important that we be able to remotely pray over you and make sure there are no tell-tale visual signs that demons have gotten in there with your little bundle of joy.
      I've done my research, so I'm aware what terrible things I have to go through.

      how can you tell my baby's possessed before s/he's even born?
      Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that
      put their trust in him. Proverbs 30:5

      Comment


      • #78
        Re: Raven seeks redemption

        It's mother is a half-abo goth whore.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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        • #79
          Re: Raven seeks redemption

          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
          It's mother is a half-abo goth whore.
          So you're telling me that for the safety of my child I have move on from the goth scene?
          Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that
          put their trust in him. Proverbs 30:5

          Comment


          • #80
            Re: Raven seeks redemption

            Originally posted by LadyRaven View Post
            So you're telling me that for the safety of my child I have move on from the goth scene?
            For the safety of your own soul as well.



            ...assuming you have one.
            Who Will Jesus Damn?

            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

            Comment


            • #81
              Re: Raven seeks redemption

              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
              For the safety of your own soul as well.



              ...assuming you have one.
              I just looked at my post and saw how selfish it sounded. I never thought it would be a phase for me.

              Anyway I'll go on e-bay later. I've got far too much stuff in my wardrobe.

              "...assuming you have one" I saw that.

              If there's anything about this situation I've missed please tell me.
              Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that
              put their trust in him. Proverbs 30:5

              Comment


              • #82
                Re: Raven seeks redemption

                Pastor Zeke, I've been wondering about that very question:

                I keep seeing references here to the idea that women have no souls. But we know they'll spend eternity in Hell if they don't know Jesus! And many of the True Christian™ ladies here certainly have great faith that they will one day be in Heaven with the Lord and all the other True Christians™.

                Is it possible to have no soul, yet enjoy Jesus' gift of eternal life just the same? Boy, I sure hope so! I'd hate to think of an eternity without María Gálvez-Villalobos!

                And as long as I'm asking, I've also been told my cat has no soul. Is it possible he could get saved and be in Heaven with me anyway? I really, really, really, really hope so, because he is the sweetest, most affectionate, most loving cat you could ever hope to meet!
                WARNING:
                In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                Comment


                • #83
                  Re: Raven seeks redemption

                  Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                  And as long as I'm asking, I've also been told my cat has no soul. Is it possible he could get saved and be in Heaven with me anyway? I really, really, really, really hope so, because he is the sweetest, most affectionate, most loving cat you could ever hope to meet!
                  Brother, you appear to be drunk. Perhaps a short nap is called for.
                  Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

                  Comment


                  • #84
                    Re: Raven seeks redemption

                    Sister Kitty, how did you...

                    Oh Goodness.

                    I only had a little Knob Creek to settle my stomach after dinner. Just for medicinal purposes, you understand.
                    WARNING:
                    In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                    REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                    Comment


                    • #85
                      Re: Raven seeks redemption

                      Well now that I've moved on from goth (for the sake of both me and my baby apparantly) can anyone tell me what the next step is to becoming a True Christian is?
                      Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that
                      put their trust in him. Proverbs 30:5

                      Comment


                      • #86
                        Re: Raven seeks redemption

                        Originally posted by LadyRaven View Post
                        Well now that I've moved on from goth (for the sake of both me and my baby apparantly) can anyone tell me what the next step is to becoming a True Christian is?
                        If you don't beleive me, read previous posts. I have enough reason to leave the gothic subculture.
                        Now I really want someone to tell me what to do next. Please don't leave me hanging here.

                        Pastor Zeke I need to know how to set up a tithing schedule, can you tell me how?
                        Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that
                        put their trust in him. Proverbs 30:5

                        Comment


                        • #87
                          Re: Raven seeks redemption

                          Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                          Sister Kitty, how did you...

                          Oh Goodness.

                          I only had a little Knob Creek to settle my stomach after dinner. Just for medicinal purposes, you understand.
                          You had a little Greek?
                          Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

                          Comment


                          • #88
                            Re: Raven seeks redemption

                            Originally posted by LadyRaven View Post
                            Now I really want someone to tell me what to do next. Please don't leave me hanging here.
                            Simple. Stop being a Goth whore and buy (not steal) a KJV Bible and read it cover to cover. Then follow it to the letter. It is the Word of God.

                            As for leaving you hanging you are fortunate that Jesuis commands me to obey secular law.
                            Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

                            Comment


                            • #89
                              Re: Raven seeks redemption

                              Originally posted by Sister Kitty View Post
                              Simple. Stop being a Goth whore and buy (not steal) a KJV Bible and read it cover to cover. Then follow it to the letter. It is the Word of God.

                              As for leaving you hanging you are fortunate that Jesuis commands me to obey secular law.
                              Why would I steal a bible?

                              Also the term "Being left hanging" in that context is not literal. It means someone ending communication with you half way. Most often leaving you needing or wanting something.
                              Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that
                              put their trust in him. Proverbs 30:5

                              Comment


                              • #90
                                Re: Raven seeks redemption

                                Originally posted by LadyRaven View Post

                                Also the term "Being left hanging" in that context is not literal. It means someone ending communication with you half way. Most often leaving you needing or wanting something.
                                No matter. Jesus and I prefer stoning anyway.

                                Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

                                Comment

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