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  • Faith_Machine
    Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Mar 2011
    • 10050

    #31
    Re: To whomever it may concern

    Friend, I don't think you understand what it means to step out in faith.

    If you want your situation to improve RIGHT NOW, the best thing you can do is promise TODAY that you will give more money to God than you can afford to give. Promise God you're going to give Him more money than you can even imagine being able to give, and then start doing it, RIGHT NOW!


    Don't worry about not having credit cards or PayPal; you can purchase a money order at Western Union or just about any convenience store.

    Please be sure to use registered mail so that money order doesn't get lost on its way to us.

    WARNING:
    In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
    REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

    Comment

    • Jack_S.
      Confirmed Enemy of God
      BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
      • Sep 2012
      • 47

      #32
      Re: To whomever it may concern

      Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
      Friend, I don't think you understand what it means to step out in faith.

      If you want your situation to improve RIGHT NOW, the best thing you can do is promise TODAY that you will give more money to God than you can afford to give. Promise God you're going to give Him more money than you can even imagine being able to give, and then start doing it, RIGHT NOW!


      Don't worry about not having credit cards or PayPal; you can purchase a money order at Western Union or just about any convenience store.

      Please be sure to use registered mail so that money order doesn't get lost on its way to us.

      How can I purchase a money order using western union, when all I got is 1.95 cents left in my wallet. man? As much as I wanted to please him with all my might, I don't know what kind of service I can provide for the lord beside of perhaps finding a customer out there who would engage into a man-love type of behavior for $25/ night. but then again it is unlikely that anyone would do that since I'm no longer an attractive man as I used to be. Cause you know what happen? I was sleeping right on some one elses couch several weeks ago and by god knows what- I woke up with all these itch marks allover my body from my chest all the way to my legs. I've been trying to find out what it was that caused it, but it was soo itchy I'l scratch it allover until it bleeds. My body now is covered with sore marks and scabies and new itch marks seems to appear allover still its soo disgusting but my guess is that; it were tiny cat-fleas that caused all these debacles.

      Comment

      • Faith_Machine
        Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
        True Christian™
        • Mar 2011
        • 10050

        #33
        Re: To whomever it may concern

        Listen friend, promise God RIGHT NOW that you're going to donate $200 to the Landover Baptist Church within one week, and then start knocking on people's doors and asking them if they have any odd jobs around the house that they need you to do. You'll be back on track in no time!
        WARNING:
        In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
        REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78555

          #34
          Re: To whomever it may concern

          Originally posted by Jack_S. View Post
          How can I purchase a money order using western union, when all I got is 1.95 cents left in my wallet. man? As much as I wanted to please him with all my might, I don't know what kind of service I can provide for the lord beside of perhaps finding a customer out there who would engage into a man-love type of behavior for $25/ night. but then again it is unlikely that anyone would do that since I'm no longer an attractive man as I used to be. Cause you know what happen? I was sleeping right on some one elses couch several weeks ago and by god knows what- I woke up with all these itch marks allover my body from my chest all the way to my legs. I've been trying to find out what it was that caused it, but it was soo itchy I'l scratch it allover until it bleeds. My body now is covered with sore marks and scabies and new itch marks seems to appear allover still its soo disgusting but my guess is that; it were tiny cat-fleas that caused all these debacles.
          Jesus has struck you with the gay cooties. Send $1,000 as a down payment, and I'll rush you a bottle of "Pastor Zeke's No-Queer-Um" powder. Guaranteed to cure and bless you! So you don't forget send before midnight tonight.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • Rev. M. Rodimer
            Honorary True Christian™
            Forum Member
            • May 2008
            • 13996

            #35
            Re: To whomever it may concern

            Originally posted by Jack_S. View Post
            How can I purchase a money order using western union, when all I got is 1.95 cents left in my wallet. man? As much as I wanted to please him with all my might, I don't know what kind of service I can provide for the lord beside of perhaps finding a customer out there who would engage into a man-love type of behavior for $25/ night. but then again it is unlikely that anyone would do that since I'm no longer an attractive man as I used to be. Cause you know what happen? I was sleeping right on some one elses couch several weeks ago and by god knows what- I woke up with all these itch marks allover my body from my chest all the way to my legs. I've been trying to find out what it was that caused it, but it was soo itchy I'l scratch it allover until it bleeds. My body now is covered with sore marks and scabies and new itch marks seems to appear allover still its soo disgusting but my guess is that; it were tiny cat-fleas that caused all these debacles.
            Why do you think God hates you so much? What have you done to offend Him?
            Bible boring? Nonsense!
            Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
            You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

            Comment

            • Jack_S.
              Confirmed Enemy of God
              BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
              • Sep 2012
              • 47

              #36
              Re: To whomever it may concern

              Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
              Why do you think God hates you so much? What have you done to offend Him?
              I don't know Rev, I'm feeling so futile right now I don't know why. I have not seen daylight in 4 days now and I've been staying in my aunts internet cafe trolling and playing league of legends. I don't have the strength or the guts to go outside to look at the sun or meet people, I feel drained.

              Comment

              • Mary Etheldreda
                Gushing for Jesus
                 
                • Sep 2011
                • 23775

                #37
                Re: To whomever it may concern

                Originally posted by Jack_S. View Post
                I don't know Rev, I'm feeling so futile right now I don't know why. I have not seen daylight in 4 days now and I've been staying in my aunts internet cafe trolling and playing league of legends. I don't have the strength or the guts to go outside to look at the sun or meet people, I feel drained.
                Well that's your problem! If you had spent these four days praying, fasting, and reading the Holy Bible, the LORD would have known you are serious! Instead, you're just looking for a hand out. Well good luck with that, dear. You won't find one here, and I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for a hand-out from Jesus if I were you.
                Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                Comment

                • Jack_S.
                  Confirmed Enemy of God
                  BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                  • Sep 2012
                  • 47

                  #38
                  Re: To whomever it may concern

                  Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
                  Well that's your problem! If you had spent these four days praying, fasting, and reading the Holy Bible, the LORD would have known you are serious! Instead, you're just looking for a hand out. Well good luck with that, dear. You won't find one here, and I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for a hand-out from Jesus if I were you.
                  I'm afraid to go outside, seriously. It's like some how I developed a sense of being xenophobic about things, and it gradually deteriorates at times I can't even orally form a proper speech. I don't want hand out... I don't even know what I want

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 78555

                    #39
                    Re: To whomever it may concern

                    Originally posted by Jack_S. View Post
                    I'm afraid to go outside, seriously. It's like some how I developed a sense of being xenophobic about things, and it gradually deteriorates at times I can't even orally form a proper speech. I don't want hand out... I don't even know what I want
                    You need to get on your knees and Pray to Jesus RIGHT NOW boy! You are infested with demons, that much is clear to me. BEG Jesus to suck the demons out of your rectum, son! BEG HIM NOW and He'll service you good.
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                    Comment

                    • Seventy
                      Unsaved trash, snotty godmocker
                      • Sep 2012
                      • 153

                      #40
                      Re: To whomever it may concern

                      Originally posted by Jack_S. View Post
                      I'm afraid to go outside, seriously. It's like some how I developed a sense of being xenophobic about things, and it gradually deteriorates at times I can't even orally form a proper speech. I don't want hand out... I don't even know what I want
                      I hope you didn't come here looking for Christians with Christian love and values. You're giving them ammo to ridicule you,I'm sure you see that,or at least I hope you do.
                      This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. Any attempt to post anything other than KJV Scripture will result in your banishment from God's favorite forum. Capeesh? --ADMIN

                      Comment

                      • Mary Etheldreda
                        Gushing for Jesus
                         
                        • Sep 2011
                        • 23775

                        #41
                        Re: To whomever it may concern

                        Originally posted by Seventy View Post
                        I hope you didn't come here looking for Christians with Christian love and values. You're giving them ammo to ridicule you,I'm sure you see that,or at least I hope you do.
                        Your values are so weird. Here Jack_S. is getting exactly what he needs - a cold, hard, dose of the TRUTH.

                        You would have him cry on your shoulder I think.
                        Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                        Comment

                        • Seventy
                          Unsaved trash, snotty godmocker
                          • Sep 2012
                          • 153

                          #42
                          Re: To whomever it may concern

                          Originally posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
                          Welfare? There are colored people in New Zealand?

                          Yours in Christ,

                          Z. Smyth
                          Zachariah,what false witness have I bared? Is it not true that you call yourself a Christian? Don't hate atheists just because we can show your flaws better than you can defend/hide them. You are being malicious and Rev. Levi told me that was a sin.

                          You are making him look bad when you act like this.

                          Ok, who added the third icon? Well,don't all speak at once,I asked for something more dignified.
                          This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. Any attempt to post anything other than KJV Scripture will result in your banishment from God's favorite forum. Capeesh? --ADMIN

                          Comment

                          • Seventy
                            Unsaved trash, snotty godmocker
                            • Sep 2012
                            • 153

                            #43
                            Re: To whomever it may concern

                            Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
                            Your values are so weird. Here Jack_S. is getting exactly what he needs - a cold, hard, dose of the TRUTH.

                            You would have him cry on your shoulder I think.
                            My values are weird?

                            That was a good one Mary,I guess making fun of his and degrading him is? lets see what does scripture say.

                            For he saith to Moses, I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion....Romans 9:15
                            And one more....

                            8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: 9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3,KJV
                            Why do you all make it so easy, and look,it's the KJV. Or are you saying that these two scriptures are wrong, and what you are doing is right?
                            This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. Any attempt to post anything other than KJV Scripture will result in your banishment from God's favorite forum. Capeesh? --ADMIN

                            Comment

                            • Levi Jones
                              Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                              Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                              Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                               
                              • Jul 2009
                              • 13930

                              #44
                              Re: To whomever it may concern

                              Originally posted by Seventy View Post
                              lets see what does scripture say.

                              For he saith to Moses, I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion....Romans 9:15
                              Aren't you the firebrand? Why not come back to Jesus and jump on the big team for the big win to heaven?

                              While I do appreciate your use of scripture and I would never ask you to stop using it and thinking about it, you really need to read all of Romans 9. It's one of the best dissertations on God's nature and sovereign choice about who will be saved and who will not.

                              I can't recommend you read it enough. I'll post my favorite part of it with your scripture in there.

                              11 (For the children being not yet born, neither having done any good or evil, that the purpose of God according to election might stand, not of works, but of him that calleth.)
                              12 It was said unto her, The elder shall serve the younger.
                              13 As it is written, Jacob have I loved, but Esau have I hated.
                              14 What shall we say then? Is there unrighteousness with God? God forbid.
                              15 For he saith to Moses, I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion.
                              16 So then it is not of him that willeth, nor of him that runneth, but of God that sheweth mercy.
                              17 For the scripture saith unto Pharaoh, Even for this same purpose have I raised thee up, that I might shew my power in thee, and that my name might be declared throughout all the earth.
                              18 Therefore hath he mercy on whom he will have mercy, and whom he will he hardeneth.
                              19 Thou wilt say then unto me, Why doth he yet find fault? For who hath resisted his will?
                              20 Nay but, O man, who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus?
                              21 Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour?
                              22 What if God, willing to shew his wrath, and to make his power known, endured with much longsuffering the vessels of wrath fitted to destruction:
                              23 And that he might make known the riches of his glory on the vessels of mercy, which he had afore prepared unto glory,

                              Originally posted by Seventy View Post

                              8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: 9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3,KJV
                              I am compassionate to my brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus.

                              To the unsaved only slightly less so.
                              Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                              Comment

                              • Redeemed Papist
                                Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light(c)
                                True Christian™
                                • Jul 2011
                                • 10409

                                #45
                                Re: To whomever it may concern

                                Originally posted by Seventy View Post
                                I hope you didn't come here looking for Christians with Christian love and values. You're giving them ammo to ridicule you,I'm sure you see that,or at least I hope you do.
                                So it's hateful to passionately want people to realise the actual reality of Hell and how much they are really in danger of going there?
                                sigpic
                                Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

                                John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

                                Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
                                The truth about volcanos
                                Sex and debauchery in public schools
                                Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
                                God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
                                Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

                                Comment

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