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Through study and prayer I feel led to compensate Miss Daisy Mae for all the pies me and my darker uncouth race have stolen from her. Where can I send the certified check??
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Re: Paying for pies
Paying back Miss Daisy is a fine idea, but robbing innocent white folks at gunpoint to get the money isn't a wise choice. If you really want to make amends, I would suggest that you indenture yourself to her for several years as a menial and start chipping away at the collective debt of your race.Originally posted by knob polisher View Post -
Re: Paying for pies
Contact me via my email link at the bottom of my signature. I handle all of Miss daisy's finances. Her pies don't come cheap, boy.Originally posted by knob polisher View Post
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
How many years of servitude would it take to settle up with Miss Daisy for all the trouble negros have caused her??Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
I can see why Pastor. She had the tastiest pie I ever got my mouth on.Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
Oh Knobby, seeing you grow in the Lord like this, why, it's making me all emotional.
I look forward to watching you grow even more!WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
Well, if you think negros at work...Originally posted by knob polisher View Post
Until the judgement day.PRAISE THE LORD ALMIGHTY!
Revelation 21:8
Animal Rights - A Christian Perspective
Satan’s new technology – Black is even darker than beforeComment
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Re: Paying for pies
I also have 1000 shares of Apple computer stock that I bought in 1984. How many shares would it take to make Miss. Daisy fairly compensated?Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
Apple products...Heaven and sea, those things are abominations.Originally posted by knob polisher View Post
Though I would love to try one of Daisy Mae's pies one day. Perhaps I can swap recipes with her?
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Re: Paying for pies
Indeed they are, dear friend. The Apple logo alludes to the fall of man and used to incorporate the sodomite rainbow flag. Apple is also active in the anti-heterosexuality movement.Originally posted by Mckenzie View PostThis church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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Re: Paying for pies
Sleeping off a belly full of ill-gotten pies, no doubt...hopefully Jesus gave him the trots.Originally posted by Marko Loimaan-Aho View PostWell, if you think negros at work...
Until the judgement day.
To answer your question, knob polisher: there is no statute of limitations for the thievery of baked goods. But since you freely confess to your crimes, and are...man?...enough to take responsibility for the brazen acts of all your fellow negroes...I would think that 50 years of servitude would be fitting, but you'll have to hash out the details with her.Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
I sold off the stock for $2.5 million. 10% goes to landover for tithes. What next?Comment
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God created fossils to test our faith.
* * *
My favorite LBC sermons:
True Christians are Perfect!
True Christian™ Love.
Salvation™ made Easy!
You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
God HATES Rational Thinking!
True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
You'll need to get in the queue for that!Originally posted by Mckenzie View PostThough I would love to try one of Daisy Mae's pies one day. Perhaps I can swap recipes with her?Comment
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Re: Paying for pies
Where did you steal those 30 Benjamins, boy?Originally posted by knob polisher View PostPRAISE THE LORD ALMIGHTY!
Revelation 21:8
Animal Rights - A Christian Perspective
Satan’s new technology – Black is even darker than beforeComment
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