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Exclamation Occultist, demon-glorifying gargoyles prove Freemason conspiracy - 06-24-2011, 09:35 PM

There's been a lot of talk about the Freemasons running the world. I'm not sure sure. I mean, who sounds more powerful: oil companies, banks, or guys who carved sculptures on cathedrals hundreds of years ago?

Oh yes, lots of presidents were Freemasons. But I thought the first rule of conspiracy theories is that heads of state are figureheads, with the Powers Behind The Throne pulling the strings. So the president is a Freemason, but he's just an actor, reading out lines on the teleprompter. Maybe the white house janitors are into old-school rap but that doesn't make Sir Mixalot ruler of the world.

However, I do think they have too much power, more than they are credited with by the liberal media. Those gargoyles look far to realistic to be works of imagination: clearly they were summoning demons to use as models. No doubt they summoned some succubi for their "nature sculpting" classes, I mean, once you're summoning demons, who could resist?

Succubus orgies or not, we can all agree that gargoyles are every bit as occultist and evil as anything in Harry Potter or Dungeons and Dragons. "Avoid all appearence of evil" ( 1 Thessalonians 5:22 ) says God, yet the Catholic Church covered it's cathedrals with the appearence of evil, but idols of Satan.

Now God is striking back, with acid rain dissolving those demonic idols. So suddenly, out of nowhere, there was a big movement to stop acid rain. Where did it come from? Not from the flotsam and jetsam of the left, who couldn't organise a peeing contest in a brewery, certainly not the normal enviromentalist hippies who would think "acid rain" means that if you catch a raindrop on your tounge you get a free LSD trip. Clearly the envriomentalists were somebody's useful idiots.

So, with their puppetmasters pulling the strings, the left wages a jihad against acid rain. Never mind that many crops, such as my strawberries which are big and juicy right now, florish in acidic conditions. And as for my cucumbers, well, those things grow themselves, and with enough acid rain, they will pickle themselves also. But the left doesn't want to solve hunger, they want to save their demonic idols.

Friends, we must fight them! Gentlemen, start your engines, and pollute, pollute, pollute!


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Default Re: Occultist, demon-glorifying gargoyles prove Freemason conspir - 06-25-2011, 01:09 AM

I don't know much about them, but I know that if they aren't True Christians, they're up to no good.

We can never be too suspicious, and I suspect that it all ties in with a world-wide plot to persecute Christians and imprison us in FEMA camps!



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Default Re: Occultist, demon-glorifying gargoyles prove Freemason conspir - 07-06-2011, 05:34 PM

It's not so much the gargoyles that worry me. It's the garden gnomes.

Where do they come from? What do they MEAN?

I just know we're only seeing the tip of the icebook here...


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Default Re: Occultist, demon-glorifying gargoyles prove Freemason conspir - 07-11-2011, 12:45 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sally Paulson View Post
I just know we're only seeing the tip of the icebook here...
Oops, I meant to say "tip of the icebox". Boy is my face red. But at least I corrected it.


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