X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • Sister Kitty
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Mar 2010
    • 857

    #16
    Re: Landover, I'm back!

    Did it crawl back to its hole?
    Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

    Comment

    • PrayerIsFun
      Unsaved trash
      • Oct 2008
      • 47

      #17
      Re: Landover, I'm back!

      Originally posted by Sister Kitty View Post
      Did it crawl back to its hole?
      The only hole I will be crawling to is the love of God™. Following my RealChristian™ wedding to Lisa H we will be departing Landover™ for the great South Florida city of Boca Raton™ and all its Godliness™.
      Revelations 6:16
      "And said to the mountains and rocks,
      Fall on us, and hide us from the face
      of him that sitteth on the throne,
      and from the wrath of the Lamb"

      Comment

      • Ezekiel Bathfire
        Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
        Christ's Rottweiler
         
        • Jan 2008
        • 22914

        #18
        Re: Landover, I'm back!

        Originally posted by PrayerIsFun View Post
        You are all probably aware that 2 years ago I was sentenced to a 2 year ban to eternal damnation. I'm back and ready for God!
        Obviously, you got time off for good behavior - I have no idea why. God's Ways are mysterious.
        sigpic


        “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

        Author of such illuminating essays as,
        Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

        Comment

        • Sister Kitty
          True Christian™
          True Christian™
          • Mar 2010
          • 857

          #19
          Re: Landover, I'm back!

          Originally posted by PrayerIsFun View Post
          The only hole I will be crawling to is the love of God™. Following my RealChristian™ wedding to Lisa H we will be departing Landover™ for the great South Florida city of Boca Raton™ and all its Godliness™.
          I suspect a medication problem. Either too much, or too little. Have it looked into.
          Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.

          Comment

          • Lisa H
            Proud to be Blonde, Beautiful, and Baptist
            True Christian™
            • Jun 2010
            • 5070

            #20
            Re: Landover, I'm back!

            Originally posted by PrayerIsFun View Post
            The only hole I will be crawling to is the love of God™. Following my RealChristian™ wedding to Lisa H we will be departing Landover™ for the great South Florida city of Boca Raton™ and all its Godliness™.
            I am a True Christian™. Not some-other fuddy duddy hippy christian. What makes you think I will be marrying you.
            Genesis 1:1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth
            Proverbs 19:25 Smite a scorner, and the simple will beware: and reprove one that hath understanding, and he will understand knowledge.
            Ezekiel 16:14 And thy renown went forth among the heathen for thy beauty: for it was perfect through my comeliness, which I had put upon thee, saith the Lord GOD.
            Proverbs 6:25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
            Genesis 24:16 And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up.
            Song of Solomon 1:15 Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast doves' eyes.

            Comment

            • DeadMan89
              Confirmed Enemy of God
              • Nov 2010
              • 107

              #21
              Re: Landover, I'm back!

              Originally posted by Lisa H View Post
              I am a True Christian™. Not some-other fuddy duddy hippy christian. What makes you think I will be marrying you.
              Because he's a man and he told you so?

              From what I gathered from you guys, that's all it takes. Am I right? Of course I'm right, I'm a man and that makes me right.

              See? I can play your game too.

              Comment

              • Rev. Jim Osborne
                True Christian™ Televangelist
                Director of Fundraising and Tithing
                On the Look Out for Wife #6!
                True Christian™
                • Jun 2009
                • 8622

                #22
                Re: Landover, I'm back!

                Originally posted by DeadMan89 View Post
                Because he's a man and he told you so?

                From what I gathered from you guys, that's all it takes. Am I right? Of course I'm right, I'm a man and that makes me right.

                See? I can play your game too.
                No, you're a worthless, unsaved Godmocker and no one has to listen to you, not even our womenfolk.

                2nd Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

                Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

                Comment

                • Lycia The Repentant
                  Ex-prostitute on her knees for the Lord
                  Now that she's Saved©, Priceless
                  True Christian™
                  • Sep 2010
                  • 2019

                  #23
                  Re: Landover, I'm back!

                  Originally posted by DeadMan89 View Post
                  Because he's a man and he told you so?

                  From what I gathered from you guys, that's all it takes. Am I right? Of course I'm right, I'm a man and that makes me right.

                  See? I can play your game too.
                  The only people who have authority over a True Christian(tm) lady are her husband, father, pastor, and God. Of course we always listen to the suggestions and advice of other True Christian(tm) men, because their advice is always Godly and good.

                  A True Christian(tm) lady does not need to listen to unsaved trash, even if they are men.
                  "Whether of them twain did the will of his father? They say unto him, The first. Jesus saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That the publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of God before you. For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not: but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him." Matthew 21:31-32

                  An Important Reminder for all unSaved© Ladies
                  Protect Yourself! Important Information about Demons
                  My five Six Step Guide to Stopping Your Miserable Harlotry!
                  Do you hate fornication? Join the Junior Anti-Sex League and help stop it today!
                  An Open Question to All false christians.

                  Comment

                  • Rev. M. Rodimer
                    Honorary True Christian™
                    Forum Member
                    • May 2008
                    • 13996

                    #24
                    Re: Landover, I'm back!

                    Originally posted by DeadMan89 View Post
                    Because he's a man and he told you so?

                    From what I gathered from you guys, that's all it takes. Am I right?
                    No, you're a God-mocking imbecile.

                    Why are you here?
                    Bible boring? Nonsense!
                    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                    Comment

                    • MitzaLizalor
                      Completely CRAZY for the Lord
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2010
                      • 14628

                      #25
                      Re: Landover, I'm back!

                      @Bible Studentyou appear to have messaging turned off

                      (if you're replying to dead-person-thing here - enjoy!)

                      Comment

                      • Bible Student
                        Master of Biblical Study and Ancient Languages
                        With Jesus now.
                        True Christian™
                        • Dec 2010
                        • 2474

                        #26
                        Re: Landover, I'm back!

                        Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                        Originally Posted by DeadMan89
                        Because he's a man and he told you so?

                        From what I gathered from you guys, that's all it takes. Am I right?
                        No, you're a God-mocking imbecile.

                        Why are you here?
                        Notice the poster's name. It is no coincidence that he is named so.
                        Romans 6:23 -- For the wages of sin is death;
                        And finally
                        Romans 6:20 -- For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness
                        He admits he is the willing tool of Satan.
                        YiJC, BS

                        II Peter 1:4 -- Whereby are giuen vnto vs exceeding great and precious promises, that by these you might bee partakers of thy diuine nature, hauing escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

                        Comment

                        • Bible Student
                          Master of Biblical Study and Ancient Languages
                          With Jesus now.
                          True Christian™
                          • Dec 2010
                          • 2474

                          #27
                          Re: Landover, I'm back!

                          Originally posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
                          @Bible Studentyou appear to have messaging turned off

                          (if you're replying to dead-person-thing here - enjoy!)
                          Thanks. I had one too many check marks. I better go back to some remedial reading courses.
                          YiJC, BS

                          II Peter 1:4 -- Whereby are giuen vnto vs exceeding great and precious promises, that by these you might bee partakers of thy diuine nature, hauing escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

                          Comment

                          • DeadMan89
                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                            • Nov 2010
                            • 107

                            #28
                            Re: Landover, I'm back!

                            Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                            No, you're a God-mocking imbecile.

                            Why are you here?
                            Because I enjoy reading what retarded morons have to say.

                            Comment

                            • Levi Jones
                              Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                              Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                              Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                               
                              • Jul 2009
                              • 13930

                              #29
                              Re: Landover, I'm back!

                              Originally posted by DeadMan89 View Post
                              Because I enjoy reading what retarded mormons have to say.
                              Then why not find a mormon message board to torment?
                              Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                              Comment

                              • Minecraft
                                Forum Member
                                • Nov 2010
                                • 101

                                #30
                                Re: Landover, I'm back!

                                It's been 2 years Man, that's quite awhile! Welcome back!

                                Comment

                                Working...