Sainthood

[BrotherLarry]

One of my papist friends called to see how my life was going and while I don’t enjoy or have time for idle chitchat I indulged her since I won’t be able to show her kindness when she gets to Hell. She mentioned how she watched the movie The Song of Bernadette and how she still wants to visit Lourdes someday.

As we spoke she said she admired St. Bernadette for working through her suffering and pain without complaining about it to her fellow nuns.

It reminded me of the time I was soundly kicked by a patient last year and while I needed a Bandaid I didn’t reveal it here nor did I ever complain to the owner of the horse. It makes me wonder if Jesus will give me an extra crown come the Glory.

I suppose it was more of a tap and not a kick since the horse was sedated and restrained but it could have been much worse if the patient was able to get its hoof in direct contact with my head. As it was I bumped against the door of the barn and it broke my skin ever so slightly. Now that you know how dangerous my work is it probably will make you want to treat me with a little more respect.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Sainthood

How would anyone know this Bernadette was working through suffering and pain unless she did. complain about it to her fellow nuns? Or are we expected to believe that she said, "Yikes! I sure am suffering in pain here, I suppose I'll just have to work through it and not complain. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! No thank you - I don't want any poppy juice. That would be tantamount to complaining."

Sort of like saying they don't worship idols. When papists starts calling to see how your life's going, that's when you need to give them the flick.

[Basilissa]

Re: Sainthood

How would anyone know this Bernadette was working through suffering and pain unless she did. complain about it to her fellow nuns?

Precisely, Sister Mitza, precisely. If she didn't say anything, how are we to know she was suffering? And if she did complain, that makes her a whiny baby. Either way, not much of a "saint."

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Sainthood

She mentioned how ... she still wants to visit Lourdes someday.

Is she a gimp?


One way or the other, you can rent one of these from Landover for $10 a week. They are imported from Lourdes and if placed somewhere conspicuous in the home, this (and other plaster "souvenirs" like it) are guaranteed to put anyone off popery.

And don't ask what it it - it is advertised as "Jesus's Hand".

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Sainthood

Bernadette spoke Occitan, so nobody else could tell if she was complaining or just chatting about the weather.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Sainthood

How would anyone know this Bernadette was working through suffering and pain unless she did. complain about it to her fellow nuns? Or are we expected to believe that she said, "Yikes! I sure am suffering in pain here, I suppose I'll just have to work through it and not complain. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! No thank you - I don't want any poppy juice. That would be tantamount to complaining."

Sort of like saying they don't worship idols. When papists starts calling to see how your life's going, that's when you need to give them the flick.

When Soeur Bernadette passed out due to her pain, it was discovered that she had sores and suffered from debilitating illness. Watch the movie and you'll understand. But like I said, it makes you want to treat me with more respect, doesn't it?

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Sainthood

Brother Bathfire,


That's just - lovely. Is there a limit to how long one can keep it? I would think they'd be in indescribable demand. My mother would love it if I rented one for her birthday month, but she'd do 1000 Hail Marys if I got one for her permanently.


Until the thing finally got rid of her popery, that is.


BrotherLarry
Revelation 22:12

[Isabella White]

Re: Sainthood

One way or the other, you can rent one of these from Landover for $10 a week. They are imported from Lourdes and if placed somewhere conspicuous in the home, this (and other plaster "souvenirs" like it) are guaranteed to put anyone off popery.

And don't ask what it it - it is advertised as "Jesus's Hand".

Oh, dear Brother Bathfire: Goodness me, I do hope you won't mind my saying so, but that object is rather Exodus 20:4-ish:

"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth."

And we all know how graven images are sure to bring about the Holy Wrath of the Almighty.

A blessed evening to you, dear Brother Bathfire,
Sincerely, Isabella W.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Sainthood

When Soeur Bernadette passed out due to her pain, it was discovered that she had sores and suffered from debilitating illness. Watch the movie and you'll understand. But like I said, it makes you want to treat me with more respect, doesn't it?

"Respect" is a funny word, isn't it? People keep going on about how we should respect the religious beliefs of people who say we should be killed due to the ones doing actual killings are just a minority and that theirs is a corrupted reading of whatever texts the dogma stems from. Two difficulties arise at once viz. that anyone can read those texts and see what they say for themselves and that where they constitute the law of the land it is the "corrupted" extreme readings which are enforced.

If that happened in just one or two tin pot dictatorships there may be something in what's claimed but if in major world economies the "extreme" were the norm then no-one worthy of respect would say otherwise.

But perhaps there's a special, different, type of respect. Insane persons often confuse fear with respect. In that case where I use two words (respect & fear) they'd only have one word (respect) and would need to differentiate somehow. Ascribing an extra "secret" meaning to their word doesn't achieve anything more than secret language.

Christians tell the truth about Jesus but we know there are deceivers out there who make up any old nonsense and pretend that's what Jesus wants even if it's the opposite of what He says He wants us to do. I often wonder what would have happened if no-one cared about equine health and wellbeing and when Jesus sent the disciples to find a mount for Him to enter Jerusalem? Would He have had to walk? Someone who makes sure is always worthy of respect.

graven images are sure to bring about the Holy Wrath

I noticed in your post how those wretched idolators couldn't even get the mounting brackets right

Not only have they ignored the ways of The LORD they haven't even learned the way of the heathen!

Jeremiah 10:2-5 Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them. For the customs of the people are vain: for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe. They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not. They are upright as the palm tree, but speak not: they must needs be borne, because they cannot go. Be not afraid of them; for they cannot do evil, neither also is it in them to do good.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Sainthood

When Soeur Bernadette passed out due to her pain, it was discovered that she had sores and suffered from debilitating illness.

If I remember correctly, Bertrand Mélenchon, the French Baptist theologian, reported in his 1912 paper "Examen de la vie non-miraculeuse de Bernadette Soubirous" managed to get sight of the autopsy report. She died of a particularly virulent form of athelete's foot.

I think there is some irony in her being called Soeur Bernadette when she was complaining of "Sores"

[Dana723]

Re: Sainthood

Dear Brother Larry, you are so humble! My family and I pray daily for you and for your mission. The only time I wish I had a daughter was when I wish I had a daughter for you to marry.


In other news, have you heard from my son? I sent the money yesterday and it seems to have been picked up. I had hoped Matthew would at least call, but it seems as though I can only get messages to him through you.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Sainthood

Your son?

Oh! Your SON. Well it’s World Pride and I am sure he’ll be out there converting people but I am so busy ministering I just don’t have time to go look for him. I saw him yesterday and he was fine so I am sure he is fine today. I will have the ministry team locate him and report back ASAP. Blessings!

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Sainthood

If I remember correctly, Bertrand Mélenchon, the French Baptist theologian, reported in his 1912 paper "Examen de la vie non-miraculeuse de Bernadette Soubirous" managed to get sight of the autopsy report. She died of a particularly virulent form of athelete's foot.

Eeeew!

Eeeeeeeeeeeew!




. . .

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew! How could anyone made perfect in Christ get athlete's foot? Isn't it something fungal sending roots down into your bones? Then the toes turn purple and drop off.

NURSE oh Bernadette have you been eating plums in bed?
CRONE no
NURSE

[Basilissa]

Re: Sainthood

Eeeew!

Eeeeeeeeeeeew!




. . .

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew! How could anyone made perfect in Christ get athlete's foot? Isn't it something fungal sending roots down into your bones? Then the toes turn purple and drop off.

NURSE oh Bernadette have you been eating plums in bed?
CRONE no
NURSE

Excellent point as always, Sister. True Believers don't suffer such smelly diseases. Frankly, True Believers don't suffer almost any diseases. Well, gaut, maybe. But athlete's foot? Never.

That woman with smelly feet will roast in Hell forever.

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Re: Sainthood

That woman with smelly feet will roast in Hell forever.

Indeed! That's what the stupid woman gets for stepping away from the stove to play sports to get herself an athlete's foot! Thank God she was punished; the silly broad probably stepped on tacks.


Women who try to usurp men in activities unbefitting to their feminine nature are always punished!


This is a good read on the subject:

https://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Womens%20Page/christian_women_and_sports.htm