A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

This is what colleges, high schools, mainstream media, museums, libraries, and other wicked places of misinformation teach:

In the beginning there was this:



Which then somehow "came to life" via unknown means (lightning strike, pole shift, voodoo curse, who knows?)...



One-celled organisms. Then they magically bunch up and create multicellular life...



Which became more complex...



Turning into fish...



Which then somehow grew lungs, arms, and legs, and went ashore...



Which then got killed out, but not before turning into mice...



Which then became monkeys...



And finally....became us!




And these idiots dare to call our story of creation a "fairy tale"!

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

I DARE any Secularist to look at that the first picture of a steaming pile of shit and EXPLAIN to me how it turned into Reverend Osborne ! Evolution is SUPPOSED to be gradual change over time, animals just adapting their forums in reaction to environmental pressure. Well Atheists, if this is true THEN show how deep down Jim is a just a boiling pit of toxic mud in the shape of a man.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

I am a peaceful person by nature, but if anyone came up to me and implied in even the most roundabout fashion that you, one of the most well-respected people in the world, had evolved from mud I would scissor-kick them into next week.



Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth
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[Jack O'fagan]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Amen Reverend! Atheists wonder why we laugh at them, but how can you not laugh. They will believe ANYTHING.

Atheists say that evolution is a gradual process but if you asked them to look at your pictures and provide the links between the species they just can't do it.

By the way, your good lady wife is a real Honey.

YiC

Jack

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Well, I used myself as an example of the evolutionist "mud -> human" theory, since I needed a supreme example of a human being at their best, and didn't need to look any further than myself.

Also, the lady in the picture is not my wife unfortunately, but rather my close female friend Jan Crouch. (You probably don't recognize her because that's a new shade of pink in her hair.)

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Well, I used myself as an example of the evolutionist "mud -> human" theory, since I needed a supreme example of a human being at their best, and didn't need to look any further than myself.

Also, the lady in the picture is not my wife unfortunately, but rather my close female friend Jan Crouch. (You probably don't recognize her because that's a new shade of pink in her hair.)

Well Paul Crouch is a VERY lucky man. The Lord has truly blessed him with a mighty fine looking lady.

Jack

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Also, the lady in the picture is not my wife unfortunately, but rather my close female friend Jan Crouch. (You probably don't recognize her because that's a new shade of pink in her hair.)

What? Then what about that retreat in Phoenix Rev?

[Bob4God]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

No child should have to be taught the lie that they are an animal that came from mud.

The results of this teaching are self-evident: It causes them to have no sense of worth, and that in turn leads them to act like animals who shoot up their schools, have premarital sex, and cuss.

If schools would instead teach the truth about how we came from dirt, NOT mud, I think that kids today would have a lot more respect for themselves and their fellow dirt-o-sapians.

And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. - Genesis 2:7

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

And these idiots dare to call our story of creation a "fairy tale"!

It's obvious all those animals are different from each other.

And if you've ever owned a mouse, or even observed one for a while, you know they don't change into dinosaurs and back again at whim.

[sonjay]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

I DARE any Secularist to look at that the first picture of a steaming pile of shit and EXPLAIN to me how it turned into Reverend Osborne ! Evolution is SUPPOSED to be gradual change over time, animals just adapting their forums in reaction to environmental pressure. Well Atheists, if this is true THEN show how deep down Jim is a just a boiling pit of toxic mud in the shape of a man.

Actually brothers, there is a pretty interesting experiment you can do that shows this! It's called the Miller-Urey experiment and if you perform it, you can actually create prokaryotes (pre-cursors to cells)! It's interesting, because it shows how life could have possibly arisen, even in the primordial ooze of early earth! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miller%...rey_experiment

May god's love be upon you.

[Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Actually brothers, there is a pretty interesting experiment you can do that shows this! It's called the Miller-Urey experiment and if you perform it, you can actually create prokaryotes (pre-cursors to cells)! It's interesting, because it shows how life could have possibly arisen, even in the primordial ooze of early earth! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miller%...rey_experiment

May god's love be upon you.

Yeah, has anyone gone any further than that experiment of 60 years ago? Has anyone ever created cells or anything closer to life than that?

I think you already know the answer.

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Actually brothers, there is a pretty interesting experiment you can do that shows this! It's called the Miller-Urey experiment and if you perform it, you can actually create prokaryotes (pre-cursors to cells)! It's interesting, because it shows how life could have possibly arisen, even in the primordial ooze of early earth! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miller%...rey_experiment

May god's love be upon you.

Ok, so they made some ingredients, big deal. Did they create life? No. Could they? No.

That experiment was done in the fifties. If evolution was true their mud in a test tube should be a monkey by now.


Here is the answer,

Genesis 2:7 And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.

YiC

Jack

[drTarzan]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

How is that less believable than a son of a virgin mother (HINT: even if there was no penetration, when a baby is born, he destroys the hymen on his way out) that was concieved by a dove, that turns water into wine and becomes a friggen zombie 3 days after dead? If I get reported, it will only show how you fear the striking truth: It's all about faith. Only we have fossils to more or less theorize about evolution, but to theorize about jesus we only have a man-translated book that has gone ages "unmodified"

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

How is that less believable than a son of a virgin mother (HINT: even if there was no penetration, when a baby is born, he destroys the hymen on his way out) that was concieved by a dove, that turns water into wine and becomes a friggen zombie 3 days after dead? If I get reported, it will only show how you fear the striking truth: It's all about faith. Only we have fossils to more or less theorize about evolution, but to theorize about jesus we only have a man-translated book that has gone ages "unmodified"

You worship Charles Darwin and think your grandfather was a gorilla, but you want to tell us that believing in God is ridiculous?

[drTarzan]

Re: A Picture Guide to the Joke that is the Theory of Evolution

Of course my grandfather wasn't a gorilla. In fact, gorillas are one of the primates with whom we have less in common, as our common ancestor diverged a pretty long time ago. Maybe you're getting it wrong, as he was in a gUErilla fighting for my country (health guard, he was in charge of mending war refugees up)