[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

not everything in the Bible is to be taken literally. Some of it is symbolism. Some of it is hidden messages. So study up all your literary terms such as allusion, oxymormon, personification, simile, and metaphor.

Amen, friend. Such as the parables of Jesus.

So, please give us one example of something we True Christians(tm) thought was intended literally, but was actually intended to be a hidden message. Then maybe we can get somewhere.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

Also, apparently you guys aren't exactly literate either, because not everything in the Bible is to be taken literally. Some of it is symbolism. Some of it is hidden messages. So study up all your literary terms such as allusion, oxymormon, personification, simile, and metaphor.

I see. So you know better than God what He meant, do you?

2 Timothy 3:16 "All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:"

I think I'll trust Him.

In Christ

[Didymus Much]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

...maybe you should start being nicer and really follow your bible...

Maybe, instead of thinly veiled (and laughably empty) threats, you could point out where they aren't following the Bible 100%?

I'll even give you $5 for each violation of the Word you can find.

[TrueFaith06]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

Now, idk about y'all but I was told that God is love. Therefore, God does not, will not, and cannot hate. Not to mention, Landover Baptist Church, we are all sinners. Including you. In fact, there is a special place in hell just for you. As a highly educated WOMAN, I'd like to say its churches such as Landover Baptist and Westboro Baptist that are considered HATE groups according to the Southern Poverty Law Center. (http://www.splcenter.org/get-informe...baptist-church) How can you claim yourselves to be Christians? What "God" are y'all worshiping exactly? Certainly it isn't one of love or justice. And as a LUTHERAN with many CATHOLIC friends, I'd like to say that the Roman Catholic Church was the first established church in history. (But I guess y'all don't trust the history textbooks, you cruddy ignorant tin-hat wearers) Also, apparently you guys aren't exactly literate either, because not everything in the Bible is to be taken literally. Some of it is symbolism. Some of it is hidden messages. So study up all your literary terms such as allusion, oxymormon, personification, simile, and metaphor. You might come to see the Bible in a much more refreshing way. One that doesn't condemn everyone else but you. In conclusion, I'd like to offer something: that you clear your mind of hatred and start opening your mind. Not everyone is as hateful and mean or sinful as you claim them to be. Homosexuals aren't aliens, Wiccans aren't satanists, and Democrats aren't evil. As self-proclaimed Christians, you should be living a Godly life of love and charity, not judgement and hate, for those who judge will also be judged by God, and those who hate will also be judged by God. I'm saying that you guys should change your ways. Be the Christians that God would want you guys to be, and use the Bible to bring people hope instead of condemnation.
Sincerely,
True Faith

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

trust me

No one does, not even your mother. You're not smart, you're not funny, you're not interesting, you're nothing. Your only hope is Jesus and you're too stupid to realize even that.

And it's clearly you who needs to read his Bible, not us. Jesus is not a fun loving hippie. He is the toughest guy in the universe. Only those who hate everyone but Jesus are worthy!

Luke 14:26 "If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple."

[RealNutjob666XD]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

i can not wait till you find out that everything that you have done has got yourselves kill and trust me, i've read the bible and most of you are on your way to the place you try so hard to keep away from. most of you will roast down below for the person you love hates the sin you have done in his name. maybe you should start being nicer and really follow your bible. or you'll have a problem.

[Midge Murphy]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

Taken from a woman of whom you scammed. You cultists aren't one with the lord. You are a bunch of woman hating, racist, hate driven, greedy fools. You need to wake up from your false paster's preaching and take an ethics class. There are no such things as race or gender, they are only things that we humans created to classify each other. Sure there are biological differences, but we are all human. You have black ancestors. White ancestors. Muslim, Jew, and even wicca ancestors. Why hate your family? The bible preaches love not hate. Don't be fooled into hating the world. We all life on this big round earth together so it is high time that we all get along with our fellow man. Consider this a warning. The path you walk only leads to hell. Ban me if you want. If you strike me down I'll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. That is all.

do u have midget ansesters, i do not but i am still a midget but the lord is fixing me and i think that now that i am abandoning the midget lifestyle choice i will soon b 5'7", also u say if u get banned by landover u will be more powerful then we can imagine, should we all be scared? u seem to 2 b rather violetn, i thought u said the bible preaches love (chapter and verse please, i am a noobie) but then u get all threateny & scary, i bet u are hairy & overweight.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

You cultists aren't one with the lord. You are a bunch of woman hating, racist, hate driven, greedy fools. You need to wake up from your false paster's preaching and take an ethics class. There are no such things as race or gender, they are only things that we humans created to classify each other. Sure there are biological differences, but we are all human. You have black ancestors. White ancestors. Muslim, Jew, and even wicca ancestors. Why hate your family? The bible preaches love not hate. Don't be fooled into hating the world. We all life on this big round earth together so it is high time that we all get along with our fellow man. Consider this a warning. The path you walk only leads to hell. Ban me if you want. If you strike me down I'll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. That is all.

Dear, do try and think logically here. If Landover Baptist Church hated women, why would intelligent, beautiful, sophisticated women like myself be strong supporter of such a thing?

Furthermore, the foolish idea that I have black or jewish people in my family is libelous and will not be tolerated. Unless you have proof of such allegations (and proof that your proof was not illegally gained), I expect an apology forthwith.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

That old bag Dora is still locked up in the Landover Baptist Institute for the Demon Possessed, and she is unresponsive to treatment. She is a known boozehound, a liar and a thief. She even has a criminal record! I'd hitch my horse to a different wagon if I were you, boy.

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.

[marctuker]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

Yes. and here is the proof:

Hello, my name is Dora. You’ve seen my picture, so you know that I am an extremely attractive woman. But that is only 7/8 of my story. I am also very sophisticated. But don’t let that intimidate you. I have my foibles and weaknesses. In fact, I am currently in recovery for the psychological abuse I have suffered at the hands of Landover Baptist Church.
It is not really a church at all – it's more like a crazed cult. And they psychologically abuse people and try to leach every last bit of their money before they are cast aside like dead cats that have died of poison in the night! Friends, it has been a harrowing 5 years since I first befriended Mrs. Betty Bowers when we reached for the same Botega Veneto handbag while shopping in New York. I stopped to admire her very expensive coat – and the next thing I knew she was getting me to confess Jesus as my personal Savior in the shoe department at Barneys.
Before I knew it, I was signed up with Landover Baptist Church and being expected to write checks from my husband’s investment accounts for over $25,000 a month. They had sent me to a “spiritual cleansing facility” in South Dakota, which was nothing more than a glorified concentration-camp/health-spa where I was brainwashed while getting herbal wraps. It was all very sneaky and I fell into these crazed zealots’ trap. Before I knew it, I was rebuking people at malls and slapping people of other faiths very hard across the face after they answered their doors. I thought I was happy, but I was miserable! When I tried to leave, their security people would track me down and threaten to reveal some embarrassing things I had shared with Pastor Deacon Fred in his tape-recorded “soul cleansing confession time.” I suddenly found myself in a situation just like Tom Cruise and those equally crazy money-grabbing Scientologists!
Anyway, to make a long story short, those ghouls haven't given me a moment's peace since I closed my tithe/investment account with Schwab. The following Sunday, Pastor Deacon Fred made me stand up in front of the entire congregation of 25,400 and bellowed: “Friends in the Blood, here is a woman who says she loves the Lord Jesus. But does she? Does someone who really loves the Lord Jesus let Him down and make Him weep inconsolably because they are liars and don’t give onto the Lord all that is rightfully His? There is a special place in Hell for people who cheat the Lord out of His rightful tithes. A place in Hell where demons use the wrong end of pitchforks to do things that I can’t even allude to because there are ladies present.”
After that day, my access card to the sanctuary didn’t work any more. And the late night calls started (usually people speculating about what Pastor had been referring to with the pitchfork comment). My dog was skinned and stuffed in my mailbox. It was horrible! I would run into members of the Ladies of Landover at the Christian Super Store and they would pelt me with prayer cards. Once, Sister Taffy tried to stone me as I walked to my car. Fortunately, I was not hurt, but the hood of my BMW SUV was dented and my windshield only stayed on because of the glue they put in the glass. I was terrified! Since then, I have been in hiding. I've had my phone number changed 7 times. I have no idea how Betty keeps getting my new unlisted number within minutes of it being activated!
I'm asking all of you to please pray for my safety. You can reach me here on the board. If I don’t post in three days, please call the police. Thank you. Dora.
JULY 7, 2002 Message From Me, Dora:
Dear, Sweet Friends in the Blood of the Lamb:
Isn't He good to us? Somewhere out there I hear a million and one "Amens"! It is all you folks who have been praying for me and letting me know that you love me and are behind me as I try to extracate myselve from the talons of Landover Baptist Church.
I am still in hiding in Miami. I just moved into a fabulous new highrise overlooking the water. While I have been suffering the abuse from the collection department at Landover, I have also had to undergo the torment of workers in my new condo replacing the awful ticky tacky white Corian counters with polished granite inlay in a wonderful leopard pattern and installing my new Viking range, etc. I decided to do marble floors throughout because Jesus doesn't like junk but it has meant that not one of the many room (except the 4 balconies) have been safe from the filthy Mexican crawling the place and looking at my legs when they should be working! (I think several of them have cottoned on to the fact that I am groovy chick who doesn't like panties in this Florida heat so I am sure my legs weren't the only thing they were trying to look at! LOL) I know that the Lord is using me as a vessel because He likes to tempt mortals to their spiritual death, but after all I've been through I would like to go through one day without packs of men leering at me and wanting me in unholy ways. Except the hottie who does the tile.
As a full-time Christian, I sent my girl down to the homeless shelter this morning with a selection of passe cruisewear and told her she could let them pick ONE outfit each (and shoes and shorts count as TWO outfits, as anyone can tell you). I am always GIVING and yet I am living the life of Job.
I am meeting with the Venetian plaster hand-applied wall finishes person in a minute, so I don't have a lot of time, but I did want to let you dear people know that I am getting by – if only just. It has been horrible. I went to Bal Harbour the other day and was buying a Gucci-monogrammed beach set (umbrella, which I don't use because I love, love, love the sun!, fold out chairs, towels, martini cooler, and sun-fun slippers) when a bullet went through the store window, through my beautiful blond hair and into the heart of a hobo purse that I was actually thinking of buying. I don't need to tell all of you who was behind the wheel of the black DeVille that screeched out of the parking lot! No, not that horrible Betty – as if she would ever be seen actually driving herself! – well, I better not name names as they are tracing all my calls.
Please pray for my safety and that my condo turns out as nice as the renderings.
-- Luff, Dora

Taken from a woman of whom you scammed. You cultists aren't one with the lord. You are a bunch of woman hating, racist, hate driven, greedy fools. You need to wake up from your false paster's preaching and take an ethics class. There are no such things as race or gender, they are only things that we humans created to classify each other. Sure there are biological differences, but we are all human. You have black ancestors. White ancestors. Muslim, Jew, and even wicca ancestors. Why hate your family? The bible preaches love not hate. Don't be fooled into hating the world. We all life on this big round earth together so it is high time that we all get along with our fellow man. Consider this a warning. The path you walk only leads to hell. Ban me if you want. If you strike me down I'll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. That is all.

[Thomas Dalton]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

christians dont use fear no, just if your a sinner your going to hell, as a christian we get preached this everyday, christians use fear of the rapture, as well a hell, how how you call your self true christians is beyond me, show me one verse in the bible where yeshua(his real name not jesus) preached of hate? his teachings were of tollarance and acceptance

I thinkkkk we Christians know better what the Bible says than you Joo people.

But, just to humor you,

Matthew 10:34
34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.

[Didymus Much]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

christians dont use fear no, just if your a sinner your going to hell, as a christian we get preached this everyday, christians use fear of the rapture, as well a hell, how how you call your self true christians is beyond me, show me one verse in the bible where yeshua(his real name not jesus) preached of hate? his teachings were of tollarance and acceptance

Luke 19:27 "But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me."

It's just before the part where Jesus has two of His disciples steal a horse for Him to ride.

[braylix]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

I agree that Landover is NOT a cult.
If it was, I'm sure I would have somehow been beaten in submission, tortured, or just scared into becoming a Christian.
The fact that I "live in peace" with them proves they can't be a cult. And for those that don't know, I live withing the beautiful pearly gates of Landover and work for one of their very own.

Moon

christians dont use fear no, just if your a sinner your going to hell, as a christian we get preached this everyday, christians use fear of the rapture, as well a hell, how how you call your self true christians is beyond me, show me one verse in the bible where yeshua(his real name not jesus) preached of hate? his teachings were of tollarance and acceptance

[James Hutchins]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

How often do you have to beat your wife into submission for burning your steak or not cleaning the house just right according to your strict requirements? Quite often I would guess.

And btw, just one of the MANY MANY things that tips me off to the fact that this is a fake illuminati church is the Jesus on the cross smiley. That is sick and disrespectful. No one who loves Jesus would do that, but a stealth Jesuit satan church definitely would.

Friend, quite right that we are not catlicks! But you are wrong about us, we are God Fearing Baptists.
2nd Corinthians 11:13 For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ.
2nd Corinthians 11:14 And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light.
2nd Corinthians 11:15 Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works.

[frontier2k]

Re: Is Landover Baptist Church a CULT?

How often do you have to beat your wife into submission for burning your steak or not cleaning the house just right according to your strict requirements? Quite often I would guess.

And btw, just one of the MANY MANY things that tips me off to the fact that this is a fake illuminati church is the Jesus on the cross smiley. That is sick and disrespectful. No one who loves Jesus would do that, but a stealth Jesuit satan church definitely would.

Ah, we've heard the accusation many times. So, I've decided to have a look on the web, so we can compare LBC to "cults".

Here's a list from a SECULAR source, with my comments in red:


As can be plainly seen by a review of this eight-point "warning list" for destructive cults, Landover Baptist Church fits NO definition of a cult whatsoever! So all you outsiders can relax, stop suing us for "taking your children away", or stop complaining that your aged parents gave Landover "your" inheritance. (Did YOU earn it? No, I didn't think so. GOD did.)

Landover Baptist Church is NOT a cult. QED.