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  • JennyD
    Honorary True Christian™
    Sweet Placid Sister
    Forum Member
    • Dec 2007
    • 9567

    #16
    Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

    Unrapt Johnson?
    www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
    Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

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    • Brother Temperance
      Senior Usher
      True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
      A very nice young man
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15621

      #17
      Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

      Barack Junior?
      O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



      God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

      Comment

      • Mrs. Mary Whitford
        Ladies of Landover Senior VP
        One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
        Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
        True Christian™
        • Dec 2006
        • 12414

        #18
        Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

        I like "Nome", "Anchorage", or "Eskimo".
        Posted via Prayer

        1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
        Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

        Blogging for CHRIST!
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        • Brother Guy Bayard
          Anvil of the Antipodes
          True Christian™
          • Jul 2007
          • 1271

          #19
          Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

          Originally posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
          I like "Nome", "Anchorage", or "Eskimo".
          I have it. Unquestionably the man childs name must be "Exxon" Johnston, after another famous accidental disastrous 'spill' and resulting cleanup campaign.
          The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine."
          Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL

          Comment

          • Father Thomas Martin
            Pedantic Pubescent Pedophile Papist Proselytizer
            • Jul 2007
            • 1015

            #20
            Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

            How about Mary Johnston? (Like you didn't see THAT name suggestion coming!)
            ACTS 5:29

            But Peter and the apostles said in reply, "We must obey God rather than men."
            There you have it-so WHAT'S STOPPING YOU COWARDS?

            Comment

            • Brother Temperance
              Senior Usher
              True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
              A very nice young man
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 15621

              #21
              Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

              Originally posted by Father Thomas Martin View Post
              How about Mary Johnston? (Like you didn't see THAT name suggestion coming!)
              Did you know that our senior IT staff are currently working on a patch for the forum software that will ban you from posting in any threads related to babies or children?
              O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



              God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

              Comment

              • JennyD
                Honorary True Christian™
                Sweet Placid Sister
                Forum Member
                • Dec 2007
                • 9567

                #22
                Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                If it's a boy, maybe Bear Johnson would work.

                It'd encourage him to grow up big and manly, AND relate to Mommy's Godly sporting hobby of shooting polar bears from helicopters.
                www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
                Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

                Christian Ladies:
                Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!

                Comment

                • Glendora Christianson
                  Spiritual Mother of LBC
                  True Christian™
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 2329

                  #23
                  Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                  Just in case it's twins...

                  McCain and Abel
                  Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

                  Comment

                  • Remy Lebeau
                    LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire
                    President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association
                    Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
                    True Christian™
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 2058

                    #24
                    Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                    "Vyse" would fit right in with that family.

                    Cob, Arrow, Stick, Nail, Anchor or any other short, simple and/or future embarassing word will do.
                    Master of Godly Debating

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                    • Ezekiel Bathfire
                      Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
                      Christ's Rottweiler
                       
                      • Jan 2008
                      • 22912

                      #25
                      Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                      Isa:8:1: Moreover the LORD said unto me, Take thee a great roll, and write in it with a man's pen concerning Maher-shalal-hash-baz.
                      Isa:8:2: And I took unto me faithful witnesses to record, Uriah the priest, and Zechariah the son of Jeberechiah.
                      Isa:8:3: And I went unto the prophetess; and she conceived, and bare a son. Then said the LORD to me, Call his name Maher-shalal-hash-baz.

                      From Easton's Bible Dictionary:
                      Maher-Shalal-Hash-Baz - "Hurry o spoil! He has made haste to the plunder!" or "Hurrying to the spoil he has made haste to the plunder" - was the second mentioned son of the prophet Isaiah, mentioned by name in Isaiah 8:1–3. The name is a reference to the impending plunder of Samaria and Damascus by the king of Assyria.

                      I'm not sure where Samaria and Damascus are, but I bet they've got oil to plunder.
                      sigpic


                      “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                      Author of such illuminating essays as,
                      Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                      Comment

                      • Pastor Ezekiel
                        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                         
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 78556

                        #26
                        Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                        I have it on good authority that the baby is going to be named "Pistle."
                        Who Will Jesus Damn?

                        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • Brother Guy Bayard
                          Anvil of the Antipodes
                          True Christian™
                          • Jul 2007
                          • 1271

                          #27
                          Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                          I have one..."Episco" Palin.
                          The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine."
                          Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL

                          Comment

                          • JennyD
                            Honorary True Christian™
                            Sweet Placid Sister
                            Forum Member
                            • Dec 2007
                            • 9567

                            #28
                            Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                            Originally posted by Brother Guy View Post
                            I have one..."Episco" Palin.
                            Where's the rimshot emoticon?
                            www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
                            Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

                            Christian Ladies:
                            Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!

                            Comment

                            • Brother Guy Bayard
                              Anvil of the Antipodes
                              True Christian™
                              • Jul 2007
                              • 1271

                              #29
                              Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                              Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
                              Just in case it's twins...

                              McCain and Abel
                              Well if that little 17 yo slut has ANOTHER RETARD BABY how about......McCain and DisAble.
                              The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine."
                              Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL

                              Comment

                              • Daisy Mae Johnson
                                The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                                Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                                aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                                True Christian™
                                • Sep 2006
                                • 15708

                                #30
                                Re: Bristol's Baby - Let's Help Pick a Name!

                                Originally posted by Brother Guy View Post
                                Well if that little 17 yo slut has ANOTHER RETARD BABY how about......McCain and DisAble.
                                sigpic

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