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  • Palmer C. Eldrich
    Unsaved trash
    Current Status: Driving the Short Bus
     
    • Mar 2008
    • 349

    #286
    Re: Policing Freehold

    I love cold pizza. I thought everyone loves cold pizza.
    Things are going to get worse before they get better.

    Comment

    • Cranky Old Man
      Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
      You kids get off his lawn!
       
      • Jan 2010
      • 22371

      #287
      Re: Policing Freehold

      Originally posted by Ofc. Don W. Richards View Post
      Hopefully he was either fired or suspended.
      Indeed, that boy needs to learn some manners. His father obviously failed to raise him properly.
      5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
      To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
      James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

      Comment

      • Cranky Old Man
        Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
        You kids get off his lawn!
         
        • Jan 2010
        • 22371

        #288
        Re: Policing Freehold

        Originally posted by Palmer C. Eldrich View Post
        I love cold pizza.
        We don't care.
        5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
        To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
        James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

        Comment

        • Daisy Mae Johnson
          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 15708

          #289
          Re: Policing Freehold

          You are such a wonderful officer Brother Richards. Thank you for again protecting us from armed and dangerous criminals!

          Let's hope this young criminal lost his job. He was probably getting ready to rape little old ladies at knife point.
          sigpic

          Tweet me Here
          My GODLY Bio Here

          Comment

          • Free Market Fred
            The Prophet of Profit, Now Giving Financial Advice to Jesus in Heaven
            True Christian™
            • Dec 2009
            • 803

            #290
            Re: Policing Freehold

            What a dumb little punk - 18 years old and delivering pizzas for chump change. And he was white? Sheesh! When I was his age, I was already selling counterfeit Chinese Rolex watches for the Young Republicans.

            Of course, it's probably a good thing that people like this kid exist. Somebody has got to deliver pizzas, clean toilets, mow lawns, and flip burgers. Then again, that's what Mexicans are for, right?

            Anyway, good work, Officer Don. Sorry about the cold pizza - maybe you can get the Freehold Police Department to buy a microwave oven to install inside the car, alongside a new Blue-Ray video player and wide-screen HD TV. If all that won't fit in the back seat, they ought to buy you a motor home for patrolling the streets. Tell them you need it to have a portable interrogation room (could come in real handy if you catch a teenage girl in need of a strip search). Seems like a perfectly legitimate use of taxpayer dollars to me.


            squad car on patrol in Arizona

            Praise Jesus!
            Brother Fred
            Praise Jesus!
            Brother Fred
            CEO, The Uranus Corporation
            Put your faith in Uranus!

            sigpic

            Comment

            • NewlySaved
              Unsaved Trash, nancyboy
              • Jan 2010
              • 32

              #291
              Re: Policing Freehold

              Good show!

              Officer, don't you think you should quit donuts and coffee and stop harming harmless kids.
              I think you're doing a bit more harm to the harmless than good to the righeous!
              I honestly don't know how you could ever chase any Jackie Robinson types especially through your wonderfully suburban community.
              All of the police here in the citys of the East are young, fit, good, mild mannered, big stick carrying, christian boys who leap large buildings in single bounds, just an FYI
              I mean, just imagine being OUTNUMBERED 100 to 1 by the darkies? That the reality of my lonely existence!

              Comment

              • SUV
                True Christian™ Princess
                The Driving Force behind RA12
                Have at it, anytime!
                • Sep 2006
                • 11027

                #292
                Re: Policing Freehold

                Originally posted by Ofc. Don W. Richards View Post
                I hate pizza delivery people.
                Me too. All the ones I've ever run into (while Delivering to others) for some reason cannot embrace the Christian concept of SHARING

                Comment

                • Free Market Fred
                  The Prophet of Profit, Now Giving Financial Advice to Jesus in Heaven
                  True Christian™
                  • Dec 2009
                  • 803

                  #293
                  Re: Policing Freehold

                  Originally posted by NewlySaved View Post
                  Good show!

                  Officer, don't you think you should quit donuts and coffee and stop harming harmless kids.
                  Quite coffee and donuts! Son, that is sacrilege. Coffee and donuts are as American as pizza, beer and taco chips. Don't believe all that liberal nonsense about how high-fructose corn syrup, trans-fat, mercury, growth hormones in meat and dairy, salmonella, cigarettes, nuclear waste, etc, etc, are all bad for you. Just like global warming hoax, liberal alarmists are simply trying to scare you into believing that you're being poisoned, so that you vote for Big Government Democrats. They want to put Al Gore in power so he can erect a New World Order.

                  Do you want you to feel guilty every time you eat a Hostess Twinkie, drive a gas-guzzling SUV or motor home, take out a subprime loan you can't afford, or enjoy a supersized tuna sandwich rich in nutritious mercury? Of course not! Indulging your every fantasy and paying for it later is what life is all about.

                  Liberals are anti-business, thus anti-American. They want you to think that holy corporations like Enron and Goldman-Sachs are somehow up to no good. That is ridiculous - these companies were created by God to serve mankind!

                  Brother NewlySaved, tune into Rush Limbaugh and Fox News, put your faith in Big Business, and shop at Wal-Mart. As a Christian, buying things from big corporations is your sacred duty - after 9/11, George W Bush told all patriotic Americans to "go shopping." The Lord gave you a credit card for a reason - don't be afraid to use it!


                  The keys to happiness, straight from God

                  Eat only at fast food restaurants, and avoid communist "health food" stores. Remember, you can never be too fat or too rich.

                  Praise Jesus!
                  Brother Fred

                  "Those who deface a Hummer in words or deed deface the American flag and what it stands for."
                  - Rick Schmidt, International Hummer Owners Group
                  Praise Jesus!
                  Brother Fred
                  CEO, The Uranus Corporation
                  Put your faith in Uranus!

                  sigpic

                  Comment

                  • Buford T Scoggins
                    Founder, Operation Rescue, Now in Heaven with Jesus
                    True Christian™
                    • Aug 2007
                    • 911

                    #294
                    Re: Policing Freehold

                    Brother Officer Don,

                    Have you seen this darkie lurking in the back streets of Freehold?


                    This Jan. 13, 2010 photo released
                    by Terez Miles shows her son Jordan
                    Miles at the hospital in Pittsburgh.
                    Miles was charged on Jan. 13 with
                    assault and resisting arrest.


                    He was beaten by righteous plainclothes police officers and arrested because he was carrying a bottle of Mountain Dew inside his coat pocket. Now the liberals are pissing and moaning about this, and the police officers have been "reassigned." There is an investigation under way. The darkie's mother is threatening to sue - she's claiming that it was a case of racial profiling.

                    Full story can be found here.

                    This is just outrageous! A bottle of Mountain Dew can be a very dangerous weapon. Plus, it was being carried concealed. Did the Negro have a permit to carry a concealed weapon? Of course not! And as for that swollen eye in the photo, I bet he stuck himself in the eye by accident with a cocaine spoon while snorting.

                    Well, this incident occurred in Pittsburgh, a liberal east coast city, with a large negro population. That's a long way from Freehold, but on the other hand, these criminals tend to spread out and target good white Christian folks in the suburbs. I hope you will study this guy's face - he could show up in Freehold at any time with his concealed Mountain Dew, to stalk white women, rob little old ladies, or work for ACORN. I trust that if he does, he will not show the leniency that the Pittsburgh police officers shamefully did.

                    yours in Christ,
                    Brother Buford
                    yours in Christ,
                    Brother Buford

                    sigpic

                    The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them.
                    - Rush Limbaugh

                    Comment

                    • James Hutchins
                      True Christian™
                      Just a Regular Nice Guy
                       
                      • Jun 2009
                      • 29453

                      #295
                      Re: Policing Freehold

                      Brother Buford, I noticed there was no mention of where the nigra stole the Dew from. Was it nigra on nigra hate crime, hence the cover up?
                      Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                      Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                      Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                      Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                      Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                      Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                      Comment

                      • SUV
                        True Christian™ Princess
                        The Driving Force behind RA12
                        Have at it, anytime!
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 11027

                        #296
                        Re: Policing Freehold

                        Originally posted by Buford T Scoggins View Post

                        This Jan. 13, 2010 photo released
                        by Terez Miles shows her son Jordan
                        Miles at the hospital in Pittsburgh.
                        Miles was charged on Jan. 13 with
                        assault and resisting arrest.

                        ...A bottle of Mountain Dew can be a very dangerous weapon...
                        Particularly down the throats of savages. Because we all know what "Mountain Dew" is a euphemism for

                        Comment

                        • Buford T Scoggins
                          Founder, Operation Rescue, Now in Heaven with Jesus
                          True Christian™
                          • Aug 2007
                          • 911

                          #297
                          Re: Policing Freehold

                          Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
                          Brother Buford, I noticed there was no mention of where the nigra stole the Dew from. Was it nigra on nigra hate crime, hence the cover up?
                          Brother James, it saddens my heart to acknowledge that it's entirely possible there were nigra police officers involved. How we can allow them to wear the uniform that should be reserved for white people - as God intended - only goes to show how far down the hole the liberals have sunk our once great nation.

                          And just look at who is our president!

                          Freeing the slaves was a tragic, historical mistake. None of this ever would have happened if that Jew-bastard Abraham Lincoln hadn't stole the presidency with the help of ACORN.

                          Our only hope now is that God will finish what He started with the AIDS epidemic, which fortunately kills only fags and negroes.

                          yours in Christ,
                          Brother Buford
                          yours in Christ,
                          Brother Buford

                          sigpic

                          The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them.
                          - Rush Limbaugh

                          Comment

                          • Ofc. Don W. Richards
                            True Christian™ Officer of THE Law
                            True Christian™
                            • Jun 2009
                            • 491

                            #298
                            Re: Policing Freehold

                            TUESDAY, JANUARY 26, 2010

                            Guess who I pulled over today? Everybody's favorite pizza delivery punk, Shane. (What a queero name.) Caught him speeding (6 MPH over) and stopped him.

                            He seemed to be pretty nervous, I know he recognized me.

                            "You're in a big hurry there. Where's the fire?"

                            He was momentarily stunned and didn't respond till I banged on the roof of his car and said "Hello!?"

                            "Uh, this order is already ten minutes late!" Like that was going to impress me?

                            "You should have left with it earlier then, shouldn't have you?"

                            "Well, um, actually the cooks messed it up once and it had to be re-done, Officer, sir."

                            I failed to see how that was my problem.

                            "I fail to see how that's my problem" I told him.

                            He didn't respond he just looked at the clock in his dash.

                            I decided to take pity on him.

                            "Okay Shane, here's what I'm going to do for you. I will do a ride-along, and monitor your driving. If you do a good job -better than the one you did for your first driving instructor, I'm sure- then I won't write you a ticket."

                            "Oh, I'm, uh, not allowed to have passengers."

                            "Do I look like a passenger? I am an Officer of the Law!"

                            With that I opened his passenger seat, told him to move the pizzas to the back seat, and climbed on in.

                            Once we started moving, I reminded him to come back this way so that I could retrieve my patrol unit.

                            He was doing fairly well, except for being ultra-nervous. Hands shaking, eyes darting about. He stayed right at the speed limit which upset me. People who drive right at the speed limit are showing a disregard for public safety.

                            During the commute to 1103 W. Ark, I decided to unbuckle my seat belt, turn around and see just what it was he was in such a hurry to "deliver." I was starting to suspect maybe he was actually trafficking drugs, and that's why he was so nervous.

                            I opened up the carrying bags and started opening the pizza boxes. The first one was a meat lover's. I picked a few toppings off and sampled them. They tasted normal, I don't think it was one of those marijuana pizzas you hear about. I ate a few more, and closed the box. I would wait and see if I got high.

                            Nothing happened, even after we sat in traffic at a red light for five minutes. Nobody was saying anything.

                            I turned around again and opened up another pizza box. This one was a plain cheese. It would be difficult to sample without ruining the pizza. I hadn't thought to bring my drug testing field kit.

                            I decided the best course of action would be to pinch some of the crust off, and pinch a bit of cheese off and eat those together.

                            Again, they tasted normal. Yet if there was a very little trace amount of drugs, I wouldn't taste anything different. That got me to thinking that if there was a trace amount, it might take more to actually get me high and therefore bust this punk for drug trafficking.

                            The only other thing in the box was a salad. It wasn't likely there would be drugs in a salad. I hate salads anyway. I decided it would be prudent to eat a couple of croutons off the salad.

                            When we reached the house, I had eaten a lot of the ingredients and nothing had happened, so there was nothing I could do to stop him from selling the pizza.

                            I stayed in the car when he went up to the door. I thought it'd be a good time to dig through his car some more.

                            I didn't find anything, and I checked his special hiding spot in the sun visor. No weapons.

                            He was disgustingly cheery to the customer. Smiling, said thanks, said "have a great day," all that stuff that druggies do to convince you that they're clean.

                            When he got back in the car, I asked him if he had gotten in trouble at work for carrying a knife. He said that his boss reprimanded him and if it happened again, he'd get fired. His boss would be doing this town a favor.

                            I never did get to write him a ticket, but I made up for it by having him pull over at one point so I could catch a jaywalker and fine them.
                            Latest Headlines From Sheriff's Office:

                            Sheriff Richards Rescues Wayward Wife from the Influence of Evil Neighbor Kids


                            Sheriff Richards Busts Up Satanic Cult Operating out of local Haunted House


                            Sheriff Richards a Hero for saving Dying Man


                            Sheriff Richards Schools the Amish in Scripture


                            7 Year-Old Coveter Learns the Hard Way


                            Sheriff Richards cleans up 4-way stop


                            Sheriff Richards busts Arch Nemesis, Shane!


                            FPD to Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus Ordinance


                            Sheriff Don W. Richards Cleans Up County Roads

                            Comment

                            • Cranky Old Man
                              Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
                              You kids get off his lawn!
                               
                              • Jan 2010
                              • 22371

                              #299
                              Re: Policing Freehold

                              Originally posted by Ofc. Don W. Richards View Post
                              When he got back in the car, I asked him if he had gotten in trouble at work for carrying a knife. He said that his boss reprimanded him and if it happened again, he'd get fired. His boss would be doing this town a favor.
                              Hm, that boss obviously is an idiot. Should have fired that brat already. Can't you quote some vague food rule violations to his boss to help him realize he should fire the boy?
                              5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
                              To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
                              James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

                              Comment

                              • Rev. Jim Osborne
                                True Christian™ Televangelist
                                Director of Fundraising and Tithing
                                On the Look Out for Wife #6!
                                True Christian™
                                • Jun 2009
                                • 8622

                                #300
                                Re: Policing Freehold

                                I see I'm not the only one in Freehold to have a run-in with that little punk. About two weeks ago, I was having a "witnessing party" with a couple of unsaved girls from the University of Iowa while my wife was out of town visiting her sister. I ordered some pizza for all of us, and then went back into the indoor swimming pool area where the three girls were gathered in the hot tub.

                                I got in there with them to make myself more comfortable and I was explaining to them how 1 John is a guide to becoming a Christian and why. Well, our conversation got pretty in depth, and I realized I lost track of time. I looked at my watch. It was 45 minutes since I ordered the pizza!

                                I excused myself and wrapped a towel around me. When I got into the house to retrieve my cell phone, I could hear the security buzzer going off. As you know, there is an automatic gate at the front of my mansion. Turns out that slacker Shane was there. I opened up the gate and he drove up to my front door.

                                I opened up my door and yelled at him: "What the hell took you so damn long?". He did that insincere politeness thing and said: "Sir, I've been here for 15 minutes pressing the buzzer. I guess you didn't hear it." I took that as a slick insult to my age and retorted: "I may be 69 years old but my hearing works fine, punk." He gave me the pizzas, which were a bit cold.

                                "Because of you, these pizzas are cold and I'm not paying for any cold pizzas. Take these back, and bring me back some hot ones. And be on time!" I chided him.

                                Sheepishly he said, "Yes, sir" and drove back to the pizza place. 30 minutes later he came back with hot pizzas as well as a free order of breadsticks and a 2-liter of soda. "My manager said sorry for the inconvenience so we are giving you some breadsticks and soda for free." he told me.

                                "Well, that's the least you could do." I glared at him. He just stood there. "I'm not paying for these pizzas by the way. Nor do you get a tip. Let this be a lesson learned, you lazy slacker!" and I slammed the door on his face.

                                Thank you Officer Don for keeping tabs on this miscreant. That kid is always up to no good.

                                Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

                                Comment

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