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  • James Hutchins
    True Christian™
    Just a Regular Nice Guy
     
    • Jun 2009
    • 29453
    #1

    Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

    My Godly Brother, the best of birthday wishes for you from my family. In the spirit of the magnificent holiday and your tireless work scraping heathens up, I have decided to forgive the five bucks you owe me. Instead, take some time to enjoy things.
    A bit of advice, avoid people with sharp objects. Curl up with the good book and enjoy your special day.

    YIC
    JH
    Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
    Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
    Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
    Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
    Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
    Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
    Tags: None
    • Cranky Old Man
      Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
      You kids get off his lawn!
       
      • Jan 2010
      • 22374
      #2
      Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

      Congratulations Brother Gabriel! I just killed your present. I hope you have a great day!

      Matthew 14:6 "But when Herod's birthday was kept, the daughter of Herodias danced before them, and pleased Herod."
      5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
      To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
      James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

        Comment

        • SUV
          True Christian™ Princess
          The Driving Force behind RA12
          Have at it, anytime!
          • Sep 2006
          • 11027
          #3
          Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

          Happy Birthday!




          I mean,

            Comment

            • True Disciple
              True Christian™ Creation Scientist
              Landover Baptist University Associate Professor
              Smashing atheist science one fact at a time
              True Christian™
              • Nov 2009
              • 2445
              #4
              Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

              Happy Birthday, Brother! I'll see you about 7 o clock tonight I think, though I might get a little delayed, as we are rather busy at the lab. Project Habakkuk stuff, you know, it's really consuming a lot of time. Anyway, see you tonight!
              Sweet Lord Jesus,
              I want to pray for those who persecute me, my Lord.
              Please, treat their children as you treated those of Egypt, when they upset you! (Psalm 135:8-9)
              Dash their little children against the stones for their fathers iniquity! (Psalm 137:8-9)
              Hit them on the cheek, and smash out their teeth! (Psalm 3:7)
              Make their death and descent into Hell swift and terrible! (Psalm 55:15)
              Scatter their broken bodies over the streets of their evil cities, like Benghazi, Amsterdam, Tokyo and Mecca! (Psalm 110:6)
              Praised be Your Glorious Name™.

              Amen.

                Comment

                • Ezekiel Bathfire
                  Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
                  Christ's Rottweiler
                   
                  • Jan 2008
                  • 22895
                  #5
                  Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

                  Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
                  sigpic


                  “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                  Author of such illuminating essays as,
                  Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                    Comment

                    • Pastor Ezekiel
                      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                       
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 78556
                      #6
                      Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

                      Happy Birthday Brother Gabe. The work you've been doing with your various projects (including project "H") has been exemplary.

                      Don't forget to send in your birthday love offering.
                      Who Will Jesus Damn?

                      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • Daisy Mae Johnson
                          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                          True Christian™
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 15708
                          #7
                          Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

                          HAPPY BIRTHDAY Brother Rep!

                          I hope you've received the cake I baked you.
                          Attached Files
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                          Tweet me Here
                          My GODLY Bio Here

                            Comment

                            • Jed_Cassidy
                              True Christian™
                              True Christian™
                              • May 2009
                              • 289
                              #8
                              Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

                              Happy Birthday, Brother!

                              A word of advice: Pastor Zeke isn't joking about the birthday tithe, trust me.
                              Matthew 7:15
                              Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.

                                Comment

                                • Levi Jones
                                  Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                                  Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                                  Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                                   
                                  • Jul 2009
                                  • 13930
                                  #9
                                  Re: Happy Birthday, Brother Gabriel Reproba!

                                  Brother Gabe,

                                  I hope your perfect health and stacks of wealth as Landover's legal counsel don't go to your head this year.

                                  Proverbs 21
                                  God hates pride!
                                  Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                                    Comment

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