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  • Gabriel Reproba
    Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team
    The Most Honest Lawyer in America
    True Christian™
    • Nov 2009
    • 2479

    #1

    God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

    God has smote an eight year old boy to demonstrate to us what Hell is like. From the story:

    WELLINGTON, New Zealand — A boy has died in a New Zealand hospital after being scalded head to foot when he fell into a geothermal pool which could have been as hot as 212 degrees Fahrenheit (100 degrees Celsius), a hospital spokeswoman said late Thursday.


    Witness Anna Kare said the boy was screaming in agony as a teenager carried him to his parents after the accident, according to the New Zealand Herald newspaper. "The boy was yelling 'my hands, my hands,' and I saw all the skin on his hands peeling off," Kare said. "I saw the burns were all the way from his head to his feet."

    Now imagine having this happen to your eight year old son or daughter over and over and over again FOREVER. THAT is what Hell is like and THAT is why we spread teh Word of GOD to save people. We may be harsh with our honesty, but we are trying to save you from the Hell that is demonstrated here for but a moment.
    Yours In Christ,

    Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

    Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

    Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
    Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
    The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
    Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
    How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
    20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
    God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
    Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
    Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
    Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
    There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
    Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

    Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
  • Oakland "Reb" Griner
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Jun 2009
    • 2241

    #2
    Re: God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

    I can just see the hand of Jesus pushing that little brat into the scalding pool for his own good!

    The parents need to take heed and REPENT !!!
    Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.

    Comment

    • Daisy Mae Johnson
      The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
      Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
      aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15708

      #3
      Re: God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

      He probably was paying the price for his parent's sins. I bet they were giving each other oral sex when this accident happened. Disgusting.
      sigpic

      Tweet me Here
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      Comment

      • Ezekiel Bathfire
        Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
        Christ's Rottweiler
         
        • Jan 2008
        • 22901

        #4
        Re: God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

        This is indeed a miracle; a miraculous demonstration of God's Eternal Message, "Lie, Die, Fry".

        To my mind, this is far more important than babies being pulled out of collapsed buildings or surviving a 'plane crash.
        sigpic


        “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

        Author of such illuminating essays as,
        Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

        Comment

        • Marshall
          Righteous and Patriotic
          Highest body count at the VFW
          True Christian™
          • Oct 2006
          • 3330

          #5
          Re: God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

          Thats horrible! Now they have to drain the pool and reheat it. That could cost a lot of money. I hope they billed the parents accordingly.
          God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.

          Comment

          • Billy Bob Jenkins
            Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
            About as Straight and Manly as you can get
            Hates anal sex. And trees.
            True Christian™
            • May 2010
            • 8337

            #6
            Re: God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

            Someone should have raped the youngster with a red hot pitchfork while he was floating in the geothermal pool, and them squirted napalm into his anus, to make it more realistic.
            The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

            Comment

            • SayvedByTheLord
              Sinner Who Has Found the Truth©
              True Christian™
              • May 2007
              • 3151

              #7
              Re: God Kills Eight Year Old To Demonstrate What Hell Is Like

              Originally posted by Marshall View Post
              Thats horrible! Now they have to drain the pool and reheat it. That could cost a lot of money. I hope they billed the parents accordingly.
              Very true Brother. There were probably bits of cooked sinner meat floating around in it.


              Leviticus 26:27-29

              27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
              28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
              29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.

              Comment

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